qwazse

First, you should ask where they've posted a registry. You'll want to save up for their gift. Second, the rules weren't meant to undermine a healthy lifetime relationships. Needless to say they can't bunk together until they're married.

"I'm not about to be bothered by the burrs up other folks' butts, including yours." Quote that around our council and someone might just ask if you've been talking to me! I hope your SM has the same attitude. In other words, he credits the work that folks do for boys and discounts personality conflicts among adults. Above all, he respects committee members in proportion to the service they give. In some cases, that service amounts to one hour a month (or maybe less), but if that's an hour doing what nobody else wants to or can do, it means a lot. (Just think about the man-hours you could waste in committee deciding who would do that one job!) And sometimes the boys benefit from someone with a troop connection puttering about council. A boy may have a project that spans several districts, there might be an opening on a council contingent that a boy might like, or you just might have the heads up on training opportunities. So, if the SM has no current beef with the guy, call him. Ask him what he's been doing lately and if he needs to still be on the troop roster for his position at council. Support him as best you can. The other two MCs? Ask the SM about having a conversation where he slips in that first line.

BD, only if our SPLs. Can get paid for the job! Otherwise, I think our adults are actually helped by getting a sense of our boys' progress. I know in youth sports we sometimes pay referees, but scouting is a different kind of sport.

It's not exactly DADT. It's asking a youth to not cave in to society's pressure towards sexualization (of any orientation) before he/she can even afford the costs of sexual activity. (Otherwise, the government or my insurance plan pays.). I've done that for several youth and, oddly, they seemed to have listened at least until they were officially adults. If a youth tells me, "I don't care about the costs, or my religion, or the norms you're trying to foist on me." I might just reply, "Well, scouting just might not be for you." Not a single youth has told me that. So I'm just being hypothetical. If one ever does, I'll let you know a few monts after the fact..

And here my worst worry was some venturer telling my she's pregnant, due date 9 months post our last camp-out! It's clear to my youth I'm stridently pro-virginity. And, since sexual preference does not seem to be as "locked in" as some would propose, I'd ask the boy if he's able to hold that thought until he's 18 and his other scouts have matured enough to join in that conversation. The closer to adulthood, the more direct I would be about BSA policy and encourage the boy to reconcile his stance with that. Hopefully that won't mean leaving the organization, but it may.

They are youth. They are rarely fully functional! This is the first substantial leadership role for most of these boys. I've been in organizations with seasoned adults, and they never quite succeeded until we all agreed that there's some growing to do in all of us. Getting boys to accept that is a lot tougher. So to each boy say something like "I'll be patient with you if you'll be patient with him!" Actually I have know idea what the right word choice will be for your boys. I've seen different SM's do it differently. The fact that they even were making the effort to listen and encourage seemed to make a difference. Needless to say, positive reinforcement as these boys complete tasks (including showing up for meetings, showing due courtesy, etc ...) is essential.

Nice to hear your progress. These 15 year olds, you should have them as part of your self-assessment. Maybe not right away, but in a few months. So, you may want to throw a little humility in the mix. "Guys, I am just starting out as SM. You're my most experienced scouts. I won't have any idea if I'm doing a good job if you aren't out in the field to evaluate me. I need you to stick with us, especially during this Webeblos cross-over stuff. That may sound like I'm asking a lot of you, but if you do, how can I make it up to you?" Think in terms of rewarding trips just for the 14+ crowd. Whitewater, caving, climbing. Or just a "leadership patrol" weekend to themselves. Then, tell them they let their SPL down. They owe him an apology. Leave the MB separate. Just tell them that as part of the course, from here on out you expect them to contact you and arrange an appointment for any requirements to be reviewed. I think that would be a plan the boys' dads can get behind.

I think the extended discussion was more than the boy deserved. I usually have them read the descriptions in the book, and they may come back to me if they found one they can make it work. I have a pair of leaders in the crew right now who don't want to hold a particular position. They don't want to take ILSC! My reply: There's work to be done. When you all want to sit, read the leadership manual and divide up tasks, I'll consider your position started as soon as you start the first task. I don't care if there's a name for it. All I care is that you decide what jobs have to get done for the sake of the crew, and we move forward from there. Obviously, you might need to find out what else is eating at this boy. For example, burn-out is clearly at play in my high school youth. Sometimes a boy has no time, or has been put down hundreds of times for trying to do a job. He might need some help prioritizing or overcoming.

qwazse: Your riding the bus with your venturer is not an issue. You really have no idea the potential for romance on Port Authority buses, do you? I bet between our Pack, Troop, and Crew, I bet I could find some well meaning scouter who would make a tempest in that teapot. But suppose I drove into work that day. Now an issue? I think not. Giving a ride to my daughter's buddy "off the clock" trumps a lot of scouting regs. But, in the same week, another venturer was dropped off at a meeting. Before anyone else in the crew arrived, we sat outside in view of the cubs and parents coming to their meeting. We didn't go to our meeting room until another youth and his mom arrived. And knowing she needed a ride home, I asked that family to drive her. In other words, seeing a chance to make YPT work (and get home in time to watch the Steeler game), I took advantage of it. I would suggest that repetition is a factor here. If one adult is repeatedly seeking out one-on-one contact with youth, you have a serious problem. If the youth and adult have earned a high level of trust, and the situation is unique, you have a less of a problem. But if a "unique" situation happens often, you may need to shed some light on it.

A high performing troop can get gold even if they don't have perfect recruitment. You might not improve your score every year and still be repeatedly gold. (And yes, it does bug me that gold was put higher than silver.)

I think for us it boils down to getting scout parents on the trail where they can see things in operation. But, at the same time keeping them in the 'old farts patrol' so they can be observers. At the same time we discover how different parents interact with the boys and begin to separate the oversized patrol leaders from the folks with a knack for coaching. We also make it clear that these boys benefit from a diverse group of adults and not every ASM need be on Avery outing.

Oops. Double post.(This message has been edited by Qwazse)

Just looked at the troop score card for 2012. Not bad. Pity there isin't a line for the SPL's signature. Can't find where it mentions "the corporation"?

Oh snap! One of my venturers came to my office and we commuted home together so she could have dinner with my daughter who was in town for the weekend. We even sat in the same seat and talked about the weighty matters of life and backpacking trips (not there's a distinction)! Between changing busses downtown, we should have dashed to HQ and turned ourselves into the SE. My bad. Guess I shouldn't blab about it. Oh wait, her mom called her while we were in transit! The young lady told her "I'm on the bus with Mr. Q.". I even said "Hi." THERE'S A TRAIL OF EVIDENCE! Worse, mom, took YPT. I'm so screwed.

Geocaching Eagle requirements update Winter camping Leave no trace Hornaday awards Religious awards New merit badges - meet the councilors Tax law and the volunteer Thos were some I really appreciated. Get knowledgeable people to do them. Don't let announcements and beading ceremonies consume all the time, have fun.

Don't totally write off council. They may be able to negotiate a fixed price which will at least ease your paperwork burden. If nobody makes profit, but bunches of boys have fun, it's a win either way, right?

Thanks E. balanced reporting is hard to find. and thanks E732 for the summary of Degenres' show. Saves me watching. So are true friends in the Internet, pity the mom. If th SM and CC were trying to break the tradition of hazing, I can see how this kind of project would get pushed forward. I can also see how two adults in a go-your-own-way troop like this might be naive enough to think they could shelter their boys from a national firestorm. I've explained to boys that they might not make rank for less controversial reasons, and they all still went forward with their projects. If the SM knew about the issues, maybe he could have done something similar. It might still cause the same firestorm, but everyone would be better prepared for it.

I'll fill in late teen a little more (applies to both sexes): Sets own unique (and sometimes unobtainable) goals. Takes religion seriously (either being for or against it or decidedly neutral). Takes political stances. Knows more than the rest of us! Holds down a job, or dives into academics, or otherwise takes responsibility of family.

E732, I do give it to my crew officers to complete. It is a good reflection tool. Haven't looked at the troop version in detail, but I'm sure a PLC of older boys could work with it. A younger group might think it's a "to do" list or maybe a test or just another trick to get them to sell more popcorn. They would need your guidance to keep it from overwhelming them.

We still have a long way to go. Our boys strongly dislike separating into patrols. I pointed out to them that we were "stretching" the regulations by keeping in 12 person group in a wilderness area. (I told the two smallest boys that they counted as 1, so by weight we were just 1 over e limit.) They can expect to make individual hike plans adjusted for the age of the boys.

I like raising youth. It's fun. People that would rather not be doing it treat me like some kinda saint, so it caters to my ego. Being able to use that as an excuse to get out regularly is just gravy.

It's what a troop or crew that could care less about JTE does for a weekend every month or so. Seriously, if you're wasting time splitting hairs over the definition (or how someone else is using it) give it to a youth in your unit to fill out for you.

You forgot the part about throwing him out, qwazse. You know, the men and women of good character throwing him out for not belonging. You forgot that part. Didn't forget. Just counted it gain. I also did not call the "decade completing requirements" phrase a flagrant lie. I accept that well-meaning folks may use hyperbole to make a point, or they may treat cub-scouts (which has nothing to do with Eagle requirements) as part of the trail. The boy may have been "led on" by his SM, but what is more important: getting a badge under some delusion that we are one big happy family, or doing good work according to your conscience in a broken world?

OK, y'all know our troop tries to put it's best foot forward but is a bit dysfunctional regarding patrol method. One practical issue is interaction of physical and psychological distance. 300' in these parts could put adults a ravine or a ridge-top away from the boys. Well, after a rough day of hiking in Dolly Sods, WV, we came upon an open meadow beside a small brook. After filling their water bottles, the 8 boys gravitated to the center of it and began set-up. I managed to guide our 4 adults to the far corner to pitch out tents. This was a big step for our SM. But once we settled in, we could enjoy watching the boys frolic through the tall grass, and on occasion they would stop by and chat. I visited their camp at the end of the evening, and everything was in decent order. The SPL was pointing out constellations and the Milky Way to the boys who were still awake. It was a truly pleasant experience.

ASM, sounds like your adult was over-officious. That may be his personality, or he may have had to endure enough nit-picking from scouting zealots in his life that it became easier to use the shirt off vs. on as a symbol of 'neighborly' vs. 'BSA/YPT/PTA-ish'. There was no need for it. Either the boy was safe with him or he wasn't. And your leader was at the same risk of accusation with or without the shirt if the boy was up to no good. Gsd, I just drove two venturers home from an outing. After I dropped the closest one at his house, there was 15 minutes of 1-on-1. It was a good opportunity to talk about college, girlfriend, religion, family. So, definitely get your daughter's friends in that car with you. Those conversations are worth the gas money.