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Last year on this day, our Troop lost a scout to Suicide.  This could have absolutely destroyed our Troop, and we lost some, but that is ok.  The majority rallied around each other, and stood strong.  I'd like to tell you, that was a hard day for us, and myself.  I personally called every parent and let them know before they found out from another source.  Bad news travels fast.

The lessons I learned when my best friend died of suicide a decade ago helped me to help these guys process their feelings.  We brought in a counselor for them all.  

Anxiety induced depression, depression, or who knows... these all can be dangerous.  Keep an eye on your scouts.  Talk with them, let them tell you whatever they need to get off their chest.  Be there for them.  Some kids really feel they can't talk to parents.

Ask me questions if you like.  I'd like to offer my services to others where I can.  Its not a fun topic, and it hurts, but talking can save someone.

 

 

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34 minutes ago, arronisoutside said:

Last year on this day, our Troop lost a scout to Suicide.  This could have absolutely destroyed our Troop, and we lost some, but that is ok.  The majority rallied around each other, and stood strong.  I'd like to tell you, that was a hard day for us, and myself.  I personally called every parent and let them know before they found out from another source.  Bad news travels fast.

The lessons I learned when my best friend died of suicide a decade ago helped me to help these guys process their feelings.  We brought in a counselor for them all.  

Anxiety induced depression, depression, or who knows... these all can be dangerous.  Keep an eye on your scouts.  Talk with them, let them tell you whatever they need to get off their chest.  Be there for them.  Some kids really feel they can't talk to parents.

Ask me questions if you like.  I'd like to offer my services to others where I can.  Its not a fun topic, and it hurts, but talking can save someone.

 

 

I know it's my faith, but you are there for a reason. God bless you.

Reading about your gift, I reflected at a time when a scout came to a meeting late  and out of uniform. We leave the uniform requirements and choices up to the scouts, but this was an unusual occurrence with the scout. So I asked him how things were going. He confessed (blurted out) that his parents just dropped him off from announcing they were getting a divorce. I knew from other life experiences that divorce ranks way up there when it comes to shock. I didn't know what to say, but I felt that he wasn't ready to join his patrol yet. So we went outside and sat on the curb while he talked.

If your in this scouting stuff very long, you find that some of it is very hard. I'm so grateful for the arronisoutside's who can work the hard stuff.

Barry

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What a hard time, thank you for being there for the boys.  I know it helped me to be involved as Scoutmaster when my father passed away last year.  Scouts needs to be a safe place for all of us. 

Sometimes it is a scout that doesn't camp and you find out it is because dad is out of work and he doesn't have boots.  Discretely, I found out shoe size and some clothing sizes, then gave him an old backpack of mine filled so he could camp.  He was in tears and gave me a hug, I told him to enjoy and don't be afraid to talk with us.  Mom and Dad still stop me in stores and tell me thank you and that he is still scouting.  

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19 hours ago, arronisoutside said:

Last year on this day, our Troop lost a scout to Suicide.

What a tough situation. I'm just assuming (hoping) the suicide did not happen during an a Scout outing - correct?

Our troop went through a suicide years ago (I was Scoutmaster back then, too - first time around).  The troubled boy had been in/out of rehab and counseling. His parents had spent a fortune and tried everything they could think of. It was a very sad outcome. For the funeral, the troop prepared a photo collage of Scouting adventures where he was present and everyone signed their names to it. I was asked to give a prayer at the funeral service.

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I will tell you, that my friends suicide ruined me for a year.  It, not to mention that I was the one who found him in the back of his dark house just 4 houses up from mine.  Its been a decade now, and after all that pain, I am very thankful to have had the experience in order to help out my scouts.  Not much good comes from a suicide, many times just destruction of multiple facets of life, but in this case, one thing positive came from it.

Its a tough go, but in all honesty, I don't believe that anyone would back down from helping a scout through something as difficult as this, as leaders we sometimes trudge though the difficulties to make the path easier.

Thanks for the feedback guys.  Again, I pray that this never happens to anyone, but if it does, know that things can be ok and let me know if you need any guidance.

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29 minutes ago, arronisoutside said:

I will tell you, that my friends suicide ruined me for a year.  It, not to mention that I was the one who found him in the back of his dark house just 4 houses up from mine.  Its been a decade now, and after all that pain, I am very thankful to have had the experience in order to help out my scouts.  Not much good comes from a suicide, many times just destruction of multiple facets of life, but in this case, one thing positive came from it.

Its a tough go, but in all honesty, I don't believe that anyone would back down from helping a scout through something as difficult as this, as leaders we sometimes trudge though the difficulties to make the path easier.

Thanks for the feedback guys.  Again, I pray that this never happens to anyone, but if it does, know that things can be ok and let me know if you need any guidance.

I think it would be great to have your thoughts on paper about how to best deal with it as a resource.  Hopefully something that never gets used.

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16 minutes ago, arronisoutside said:

Would this be a good article in "Scouting" magazine?

 

YES, anyone have a connection to Bryan?

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8 hours ago, mashmaster said:

YES, anyone have a connection to Bryan?

His contact info is all over the website.

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Related would be death for other reasons as well.  I know that when we lost one of our Eagles years ago to an Air Force training accident, and we were asked to be honor guards, it was really hard for many of his friends from his time in the unit.  For me, it was more so, in that he and I had been friends beyond his youth time and his mother asked me to do a eulogy.  Still probably the hardest thing I have ever done as a leader.

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42 minutes ago, qwazse said:

His contact info is all over the website.

Indeed; on the website there are a number of ways to submit ideas or contact the editors:

To submit story ideas: https://scoutingmagazine.org/contact/story-idea/

To send a letter to the magazine: https://scoutingmagazine.org/contact/letter/

And the regular "contact Bryan" e-mail. I've had a decent amount of success reaching him with this e-mail: scoutingmag@gmail.com

 

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