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Here's to a good working relationship with the CC. Since the poor guy got himself "stuck in the middle", take advantage of it. I would have him tell the anonymous parents a couple of things: 1. You're grateful that they voiced a concerned. 2. You were discouraged that you made this process so intimidating that they were afraid to talk to you directly, or if they did talk to you, they felt shut out without you realizing it. 3. If the boy can tell you he's having trouble with your expectations for requirement x, you'll help him figure out if you're being fair or if he has a better idea. 4. If there's a way to adjust to his limitations, you will. But (and I've seen this happen a lot) many boys would rather try and do the requirement as it's put to them -- even if they have a disability that makes it nearly impossible to do that way. Giving the boy a week or two to improve his work can sometimes surprise parents, SM, counselor! Part keeping the CC as the go-between is to maintain his relationship with the parents while also supporting you. Part of this is to encourage the boy to keep working with you. And part of it is to train the CC in MB counseling so that when you free up those hours for the Mrs., he can take up your slack!

So lots of us or our boys (or young women venturers) have passed up the chance to go to this Jamboree. Clearly we have our reasons, but then get persecuted for stating them: If you don't want to go because you are sure that you preconceived negative notions are correct, or for whatever reason, there is not need to insult it. Let's put aside any idea that conventions are impervious to insults and usually don't need defending. (The good people of Goshen proved that's not always the case.) I think there is a need to lay out why someone passionate about scouting would not do Jambo. I went to Jambo in then 80s and had a blast. I had attended other youth conferences, and in terms of sheer numbers this was the largest. It was my introduction to two of my hobbies (satellite imaging and minimum impact camping). I brought back plenty of swag, and would show it to my kids from time to time. Result: none were interested in Jamboree. The simple issue: for the time and money they could be at Seabase or touring Italy or they could afford a couple of soccer camps. Of the venturers who did go to Jambo this last time, two could not afford our trip to the Bahamas. Those who did go to the Bahamas and could have probably socked away the $ for this Jambo, went on a trip to Europe instead. Or, it's time to save for college. So if I pull off a trip this year, it will require a shoe string budget. On the bright side, there will be plenty of summits that won't be swarming with thousands of youth!!! And I think a lot of my crew are after small, intimate gatherings. Jamboree is like theater, nice work if you can get it ...

On the road 19hrs to her college, my daughter and the Mrs. requested a reading of the Hobbit. So, we stopped at a Walmart and picked up a paperback. Left it with her to finished the last five chapters on her own. (Pity, the voice of Smaug is one of my favorites.) That's the downside of a kindle, you just can't toss it to the kid who liked the story ...

Don't be fooled by "crows flight" distances. Roanoke is an extra hour (or more) drive away than is Charleston. For those of you with time to kill (?), a flight into Morgantown and a drive down Rte 19 through the mountains is usually pleasant. (Not like the Rockies, but something to see if your are a geologist. Civil engineers: the pull-off on the north end of New River Bridge is worthwhile.) I suspect the folks at WVU would be happy to give potential students a tour of the main campus on your leg there or back. On the other hand, they may already be setting up a booth at Jambo!

... Ya know, the guys who were molesting boys.....not the gay men, ... So, the guys who are in those files because of molesting girls ... they aren't straight? I love how folks like to mix their delusions. While I've met a few homosexual acquaintances who were lifelong mates, I've known just as many who were vile self-absorbed nihilists. For good or bad, they are lumped together in the same basket. When you are asking folks to be more open minded, they don't just think you're talking about the quiet pair of bachelors (or bachelorettes) down the street. They cringe at the thought of the whole kit and caboodle having unfettered access to our young people. And in response the sidle up to BD's table and thank him for a job well done!

Interesting that you did not mention Introduction to Leadership Skills for Troops.

If your troop involves boys in O/A, the other reality to point out is that in O/A elections, this stuff can be a deciding factor. At least in our troop, the obnoxious do not garner votes. Just one more thing to politely advise the boy.

Explain to the store owner the issue at hand. You could make the case that to make up for your error, your boys made sure they weren't selling between midnight and 12:35am! But regarding the SM I'll tell you a quick story. My daughter was excited for her first GS cookie sell, she had her form and we were on our way to take older brother to troop meeting. So I encouraged her to go around to adults taking orders. It was a couple days before sale start date, but what did I know? Anyway we got flack for it. Nobody was mean, just a phone call to my wife. But my daughter was mortified that we broke a rule, and asked why they gave us a form if we couldn't fill it out. (Like homework, start it as soon as you get it, right?) That was the end of her short lived GSUsa career. So if the SM shows up tomorrow, ask him to introduce himself to the boys. Because, if they decide to quit scouting because of an adult's unseemly behavior, they'll be able to refer to him by name. You could also make amends by inviting him and the Mrs. to your Blue & Gold. Dinner covers a multitude of sins in my book!

Tell your boys that there are folks who want to put a bunch of BS in the BSA.. Your doing your best to keep it out of it. There are some things they can do ... Carry a rope in their back pocket, when boy starts on his high horse, say "10 seconds" throw rope down, and say "bowline.Tie it now." If outside, "find north, now". Toss the boy your compass, ask "what's the bearing to the next tree". If the boy knows his stuff, they can be annoyed. If he doesn't (more likely) then they'll know what the real rank is under the patch,

S947, there's no age limit on calling scouts on their bad behavior. If they're foolish enough to post it on the internet that Al Gore and I built, they'll hear from me. I figure they friend-ed me for that very reason. 2C, sometimes it comes down to a "reality check." I'm not "doing it all" so that I can do scouting, and even then if one adventure goes over budget the next one (e.g., Jambo) doesn't happen. My responsibility as an advisor is to point that out to the kids and suggest they content themselves with only their highest priority activity before paying the crew a deposit. To adults, I don't feel quite so inclined. I've had to be direct once or twice, but it falls on deaf ears. (E.g., for high adventures, deposits are non-refundable. You cancel? Not my problem. It's your job to sell your share to your replacement.) I just try to keep the "needy" ones as far from the treasury as possible. Not the "poor" ones. There's a difference, you know.

See if parents who were scouts in the late 70s have their leadership corps emblems. Duplicate. Put on sleeves. They looked better anyway. IMHO, the device should be a ring (or arc) that fits around the usual patrol patches. So troop 1's VPat might be flaming arrows, but troop 2's might be bears. Or a troop with age-based patrols might promote the bears to VPat one year and and the flaming arrows the next. Or you could be allowed to be member in your original patrol and the VPat at the same time. (I think that was the original intention.) However ever it is set up is SM's prerogative. Just seems to me whatever patrol(s) should be identified in one place. Anyway, as long as the boys are recognized for "amping it up," it's all good.

BD, folks just don't relate to the need for a boy to hike and camp. They can relate to the "importance" of preserving their middle class dream. Ya know what's totally awe inspiring? These are probably the folks who will rant endlessly about the latest public figure's financial foibles .... Check some of their old FB statuses just to see. I might suggest that FB strategy to a guy who just got his car repo'ed. I know half his problems and can guess the other half, but he's too proud to out and ask for help.

All's good if Socratic is really your style. If not, there's no harm in being more direct like 2C suggests. After "laying out the charges" I can think of two approaches: Don't shut the door on the kid advancing. Just ask him, "Are you sure you want to go before a 1st class BOR next week? Or do you think you should give it another month so your scout spirit -- especially when it comes to obedient and courteous -- could shine through?" Put it on his honor like he claims at every meeting's opening. Remind the boy that he can always ask you or the ASM if he's doing a better job. Call it an "SMC on the fly!" In this case, the BOR would include a discussion of the problems and ask what he changed, or what he's resolved to do from now on, to now be worthy his rank. If you must be a gate-keeper (and from this side of the net it's hard to tell). Give him some concrete tasks. The most important thing is that he goes and apologizes to the PL and APL for making their job harder than it needed to be. If there's some other reconciling to do (like demonstrating cheerfulness about the patrol name/yell) you can give him a list, but don't overwhelm the kid. You tell him as soon as that's done, y'all can move on. In this case, the BOR would not bring any of this up with the kid. Obviously, you can combine the two. P.S. - Does he know he left his book in your car?

I'm having a hard time remembering my SPL days, but I think I was "Mini SM" by virtue of the pleasure I got helping younger scouts. I wasn't about to be bothered by an organizational chart that put some PLs between me and the rest of the troop. I also loved to hear myself talk, so pontificating in front of the entire troop would have suited me. I've seen all three among the SPLs in our troop. I don't think I favor any one style. But I think if we can put some categories out there - ones that boys know about from having a few years of scouting under their belt, we might be better able to help a boy reflect on his own leadership style.

Noooooooooo!

We do share some values. If you find yourself wandering on your own in he wide world, the hospitality of an Iranian national is possibly the warmest you'll ever receive. An the notion that Israel, for it's Godlessness and injustice to foreigners, would be overrun by eastern invaders has its origins in the Old Testament, not the Koran. We are talking about fallen empires that the Western world treats as little more than a backwater billage. The man is playing on a very ancient theme. He needs his base to continue to feel the rejection of "the Western upstarts", but he also needs a little empathy from the West.

Unfortunately, having experienced a sudden tragic loss of one of our boys, I can "ditto" what Beav said. It might only be one or two kids that need professional counseling, but your SE, if he's had the heads up that your troop was on the scene, should be able to "fast track" that. (Without our council staff's intervention, one of our boys would have had to wait an additional 4 weeks to see a counselor!) There might be someone qualified to come talk to parents and help them be on the look-out for signs of post traumatic stress disorder. Stuff like that where you might think "We'll muddle through on our own." or "We didn't bear the brunt of it, so we don't need/deserve any help." That's where keeping your pros in the loop can actually pay off. A lot of the "talking it out" is for the parents. We had the boys get together the day after. They mostly laughed and played games while us old folks met upstairs and shed a few tears and shared some worries. You'll find that a year from now there may be a parent who doesn't want your troop to go back to that trail. If adults manage to talk that through in advance, it might help folks accept emotions that might re-surge down the road. Of course the boy's own troop will have the worst time of it. Getting your troop together might help you all figure out the best way to extend them your sympathies. Anyway, we'll be praying for y'all.

PL of PLs: takes cue from SM, mainly directs the leadership core of the troop. E.g., he will fill out a duty roster with patrol names, put it someplace central, make sure PLs get it done. Gets on them pretty quickly when something isn't happening as expected. Mini SM: gets to know each of the boys. Works with them as individuals. E.g., he will fill out a duty roster, and announce it to the entire troop at morning flag. Expects boys to work as a collective. Sees patrols as merely convenient groupings. Mini Advisor: trains the PLs but otherwise hands off. E.g., he'll hold a leadership cracker barrel, put a blank duty roster on the table and ask the PLs to sort out who would do what when. He might help the PL with a "tough case", but otherwise will make some suggestions on how to handle things and leave it up to the Patrol to figure out the best course. Those are the three I can think of. Just thought it would be neat to compare notes. What makes yours one way or the other. Is age, character, troop size, or troop culture your driving factor? If a boy is very much one type, how much effort do you put into helping him change?

Our district tried a "new scout orientation" Saturday program for a couple of years. But really, the best new scout reference I can think of is a courteous and friendly older scout! For parents, courteous and friendly committee members are a big deal. We have a troop website with the link to a troop handbook, but it's really the personal touch that helps us adapt from year to year.

And what exactly are you worried about? That you'll get a percent decrease in base pay? That your reputation as an easy going MBC is ruined forever? You know what happens when you do something (anything really) for someone (anybody really)? Someone is not going to like it! Thank the CC, and tell him/her that you'll do some soul searching and in the future you'll do your best to adhere to the letter of the requirements. Talk to the SM and tell him that you've heard rumors of boys thinking of quitting on your account and ask him to touch base with the CC about it. There may be other issues, and you might have been the first name the boys mentioned. Every now and then parents take something they hear and blow it out of proportion. Now if there was a specific requirement that's up for interpretation, give your district advancement chair a call or talk to those other counselors. Meanwhile, for which MBs can I send my son to you?

It is possible to be a venturer at some distance from your crew, but that usually is based on an established relationship, I would suggest you put the lad in touch with his council venturing committee. Maybe someone in the area is thinking of starting a crew, or maybe there's a crew putting together an adventure and they need one more person to make it work,

Both strategies should be considered. Don't write off the current troop. The boy might want to ask the current SM if he can still serve if he attends meetings less frequently. For example, QMs often need to put in hours outside of meeting maintaining equipment and tracking gear. A quick report every week to the SPL the day before the meeting might help the troop run more efficiently. Find out if any of the boy's Monday night friends might be interested in visiting a troop or crew. (Remember, venturers who already have First Class can work on Eagle with their crew advisor filling the SM role until boys turn 18.) Understand that this may also be his way of saying he wants to be less active in scouting. Be prepared to accept it for what it is and support the boy accordingly. I had one set of parents want to get their boy integrated in our crew, but after a few meetings, he concluded life was all about the band for him.

A humble DL taking WB? That doesn't happen in our unit. Hope you enjoy the weekends, at the very least you should meet some guys who've dealt with similar situations with varying degrees of success. Whatever you do, don't make this person's issues creep into your ticket. Your goals should be for your position as DL. It's the COR who does the final sign-off on all applications. They can be the "heavy" and say to a candidate, "I've checked sources, and at the moment there are doubts about you're being a team player, so I'm not signing you on as committee member just yet. I would like you to sign on as a scout parent and give it a year to prove them all wrong."

A hike through bear country might help. Oh, you're cubs ... First of all, be positive. Scout shop? "Yes, but when it's open it has the neatest stuff. Worth rearranging one's schedule for a visit!" Talky CM? "He may be long in the tooth, but what preacher isn't? We'd be nothing without him, so it's worth hearing what he has to say." This might not change her. It might change the boy. But your respect for the folks, adults and kids, who are putting their all in the program needs to be loud and clear. At the very least it will keep your attitude positive.

An independent's observation ... An elderly lady, a poet, in the building where I work gave me a bunch of posters that she made herself praising "Captain Obama". (Seriously, that was the title of one of her poems.) I have lots of pro-Mitt friends, but none of them have gotten that syrupy in any of their public statements. So I give cult-of-personality points to the dems.