Stosh

Welcome to the forum! I would notify the other leaders that friended the scouts and have them unfriend. It's throws their status as scout leader in jeopardy. I no way would I accept a friend request. Even when I receive email from one of the boys I ALWAYS ACKNOWLEDGE the email by responding with their message attached. If nothing more than, I got hour email, I'll get back to you as quickly as I can and blind carbon copy to at least 2 other leaders. I do this even with Venturing Crew scouts over 18 years of age. It's a situation one does not want to get any where near in this day and age.

@@Back Pack Ya slipped in without saying "Hi", so I'll welcome you properly!

First of all, welcome to the forum and thanks for not just lurking. I would notify the parents immediately of the boy's FB accounts and the 13 year old age limit. A scout is supposed to be working on his honesty and lying about his age and publishing that lie on the internet is a cause for concern. I would in no way acknowledge or make contact with the boys, only the parents. It's up to them to handle their son's activity.

Why is anyone going to all the hassle of signing charter agreements when they mean absolutely nothing? They aren't agreeing on anything. They don't always provide a meeting place. They don't always pay their charter fee. They don't always even try to run the program according to BSA policy. It's kinda like buying a Burger King franchise and then selling Egg McMuffins and Big Macs. See how long that lasts in the real world of honest people.

In my first meeting orientation with the boys they are told that if anyone complains to me that they are being bullied or threatened in any way, the person causing the bad feelings will be kicked out of the troop immediately. I get a verbal yes of agreement from every scout every year. When asked where the boundaries are in regards to this, it's "Take care of your buddies." and if belittling others and making them upset is how one takes care of their buddies, then they need to be moving on down the trail, but not with this troop. No In all the years of working with youth I have never had a bullying incident reported to me. I tell my boys if someone does anything inappropriate to you, tell your PL or another scout. If they don't listen, tell the adults in the troop. If they don't listen tell your parents and if they don't listen, tell a teacher, a neighbor, the pastor, and if NOBODY listens, DIAL 911, THAT person will listen! If one has to have a written policy in my troop. 1) Take care of your boys. 2) If one isn't going to do that and makes the lives of those around them miserable there are no second chances. Once and you're out. No discussion. This applies to all three of my rules for the troop. 1) Safety first, emotional safety is just as important as physical safety. 2) Look and act like a Scout. Duh! 3) Have fun. Victim isn't having fun. Bullying breaks all three rules at the same time. YOU'RE GONE! No one has ever tested my resolve on this issue.

"Luddite" here that has been into computers since I started with Fortran programming, punch cards and chain printers back in the '60's..... I for one would NOT use social media for communication. If one wishes to communicate to scouts and parents use a website and the WebMaster and SM are the only ones that can change it. Put a link on it for email communication back from the parents/scouts and you're covered. Make sure the email link is not anyone's personal email, but a generic account that WebMaster and SM can monitor. WebMaster is responsible for communication with the scouts, SM is responsible for communication with adults. It covers the bases, ain't purdy, but it gets the job done and is such that the worse thing that could happen is the generic email account will fill with "stuff". One can set up the email account to accept only emails from registered scouts and parents and all the "stuff" goes away.

Well, I guess I am the evil twin. The suggestion was made just yesterday that in keeping with the 2-deep, even though it's not a BSA activity, she invite a friend along. Great minds travel the same roads.... unfortunately for us ours seems to be a dirt path with poison ivy on both sides.

It's always good to have rules because when push comes to shove, the rules can be relied on as more important than people. After all, in a court of law it doesn't make any difference what people think or feel, it's what's in the fine print of the contract that counts. Anything beyond that is agenda manipulation and political spin.

Heritage Girls competition? No active units in my neck of the woods.

I was told there was a major interest in starting a new Venturing Crew in a nearby town. The Mrs. and I went over at the high school and had an informal gathering of a dozen+ students who said they were interested. No. problem I tried setting up a recruitment time but with the end of school, the excuses kept flowing in. Now that school is out for the summer I set up a time with a two hour slot for them to stop by and sign up. in that 2 hour time slot NO ONE showed up. One gal emailed me about being interested, and the Mrs. is taking her under her wing and introducing her to the outdoors through other community organizations and clubs. She already has a kayak outing lined up with a group of women who kayak regularly. I was told there was to be 20+ youth interested in starting this crew. Looks like a lot of hype and no substance. Is this typical or did I just run into a lot of adult generated fantasy?

I've talked with a few of the parents already and gotten a variety of different "reasons" (i.e. excuses) for their boy not going into Boy Scouts. Some of them have identified valid issues, increase in time commitment, location change, added expenses, etc. After contacting everyone, I can make better judgments on how to approach the families a second time to address more of their concerns. The 10 families that had no contact with our troop other than an invite to the AOL classes are of primary concern because they just might have dropped because of the unit, the leaders and the fact that they didn't want to go where their WDL went. They will be some of the first ones I contact.

Kids today get the complete run down in health class in grades as low as 3rd. Maybe they ought to have a unit on how babies get fed and that should take care of the whole issue. Children today are a lot more savvy today than back in my generation. The pregnancy rate is up, but, hey, they are getting the education on the subject a lot sooner than we did, too. It always amazes me how much effort adults put into "protecting" children from what they already know.

@@qwazse Well, I "talked" to the three leaders. 1) There was no Webelos den leader, the pack did one pack meeting and one activity per month. That was it. I picked up 4 scouts from this anyway. Never saw a pack that poorly run. 2) The leader was burned out, dropped out of the program and took her son with her. The boy was super gung ho on Boy Scouts but when mom left so did the boy. I picked up 4 scouts from this anyway. 3) The leader was set on going to another troop. 5 of 15 followed him. Other 10 are on my list. Half of the boys had a poor experience in Cubs. That's a hurdle I have to overcome. The reason I did pick up 8 boys is because I went back, became an ad hoc WDL and worked with the boys that wanted to come to get their AOL. All but 2 stayed with the program and crossed over.

Welcome, glad you're not just lurking. Always good to get new perspectives and ideas.

Change? What change are we discussing here?...some new fangled way of feeding kids or breast feeding which has taken place for some time now?....like since when dirt was young.

Sorry Tampa, only SM's get time and a half for summer camp.

35+ years ago all my children were breastfed. Now those children are breastfeeding their children. This process is not some new social fad or political, moral or ethical issue. The Scout Law has been around for the past 100+ years and what totally surprises me that in this day and age it is a female SM that ignited this whole issue. If it were some guy SM I would wonder from under what rock he crawled, but it totally flabbergasts me such a reaction would be drawn out of a female SM. I apologize for my judgmental reaction on this subject, and I certainly agree this is not something that needs to be on a national level of discussion.

@@skeptic The Forbes article goes into detail on those issues. Look at the post I added when I responded to Matt. While not knowing about a person's past is unfortunate, it does not absolve one from being civil. Instead of taking the woman aside and talking about it, maybe it should have been handled by the CC and committee. The SM should be focused on providing the program for the boys, not monitoring the activities of the parents. A heads up to the CC should have been the full extent of the SM's participation in the matter.

But they sign a charter (contract) with BSA that they will run the unit according to the principles and policies of the BSA. So it's not a one-sided ownership issue. A church cannot charter a BSA unit and then run it like a 4-H Club.

Yep, that pretty much sums it up. If Mamma ain't happy, nobody's happy! The really unfortunate thing about it? She's right!

And I was emphasizing that when adults do prohibit it causes more problems than they think they are solving.

I guess we'll just have to agree to disagree.

Other accounts say she was shamed and embarrassed by the SM. In video interviews she says the same thing. One just has to find the media outlet that they like before they make comments on the forum, I guess. http://www.forbes.com/sites/tarahaelle/2016/06/06/breastfeeding-mom-shamed-at-sons-boy-scout-meeting-bsa-response-inadequate/#735b6ae01d05 Even after re-reading the article in Forbes, I still think the actions of the SM publicly humiliated and embarrassed the woman without cause. I will go so far as to say the SM displayed gross disregard and insensitivity to this woman and needs to apologize for her totally lapse in Scout Spirit of being helpful, friendly, courteous and kind.

The UC is the initial contact person between BSA and the unit. The COR is the initial contact person between the CO and the unit. If the unit is banning parents from the program, both the BSA and CO need to be aware of it and those two people would be the ones with the responsibility to initially investigate the seriousness of the situation. If the CO is banning people from their property, then it's time for the unit to find a new CO who won't interfere in the program they are supposed to be chartering and promoting. The only way anyone is going to get to the bottom of the situation is for the UC and COR to investigate and report back to their respective organizations as to what is going on.

I've never found any place in BSA literature where adults are to assign buddies, tent-mates or patrol membership. I've seen it done many times in various troops, but I've seen a lot of problems with it over time as well.