belladonna 0 Posted February 23, 2017 Share Posted February 23, 2017 Hello - My son recently achieved his Eagle Rank after a dustup in his troop resulting in us pursuing an EBOR under Disputed Circumstances. The process worked exactly as it should - council got involved and he achieved his rank. The problem we're facing is planning his Court of Honor. The other 3 scouts in the troop opted for a COH during the troop's regular courts of honor, not a separate thing. My son wants to have a larger event with friends, family, etc. Obviously, there's bad feelings with leadership, us and my son. No letters have been requested for him, nobody picked up his credentials, etc. Has anyone had experiences with planning a COH like this? We still want the troop involved and everyone from the troop will be invited. Link to post Share on other sites
Cubmaster Pete 71 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 Can you go it alone, and just INVITE the troop? Maybe hand pick some boys to have tasks (colorguard, readers, etc?) Reach out to the district and council? They can provide help with a ceremony, fill in where a SM should. IMHO I would just write the troop leadership out of the picture. Go it alone. I am sure you will get boys from the troop to show if they are invited with an invitation OUTSIDE of the troop environment. Nobody can stop them from attending. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Eagle94-A1 2747 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 What does your son want to do? It's his court of honor, he should do what he wants. Link to post Share on other sites
Stosh 3452 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 I don't know of any other major celebration in a person's life. The whole class is not expected to show up for graduation from HS, College or whatever. It's usually limited to family and friends The whole class is not expected to show up for any coming-of-age celebrations. It's usually limited to family and friends Weddings? Same thing Birthday, even the biggies? Same thing Promotions? Anniversaries? Why is ECOH any different? Or worse yet, every gets invited and no one shows up. Every boy is to decide how he wants his ECOH to go. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
qwazse 4381 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 (edited) Welcome to the forums! The only thing your son has control over is the invite list. The troop has control over their participation. Your son's friends have control over their participation. Edited February 24, 2017 by qwazse Link to post Share on other sites
desertrat77 1144 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 (edited) I concur with the others: your son calls the shots. Invite the troop if he wishes; if they want to attend, great. If not, so be it. Credentials: talk with the council. Letters: just my opinion, but they are strictly optional. A whole cottage industry has been created over the last 20 years, soliciting famous and influential people who are supposed to write fancy congratulation letters for Eagles they don't know from Adam's house cat. Unless there is a personal connection (employer, neighbor, family member who has done good, etc), the letters are meaningless. But that's just me. Anyway, congratulations to the new Eagle! Edited February 24, 2017 by desertrat77 Link to post Share on other sites
David CO 1783 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 Belladonna, When you are poison, you have to expect that people will want to keep their distance from you. Link to post Share on other sites
Back Pack 431 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 @@desertrat77 Mike Rowe had to go to a copy of his signature since he got so many. You'll love his response for parents who gave him grief over it. https://www.facebook.com/TheRealMikeRowe/posts/1444289945581144:0 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Back Pack 431 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 Belladonna, When you are poison, you have to expect that people will want to keep their distance from you. A bit unfair. We don't know the circumstances. But I'm not sure what she expected (or planned for)what would happen AFTER the contested EBOR. I certainly wouldn't expect any troop to lift a finger in such circumstances. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Stosh 3452 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 A bit unfair. We don't know the circumstances. But I'm not sure what she expected (or planned for)what would happen AFTER the contested EBOR. I certainly wouldn't expect any troop to lift a finger in such circumstances. @@Back Pack Sorry, but I think David CO was making a humorous reference to the screen name chosen. "Belladonna" is a highly toxic poison. Link to post Share on other sites
Stosh 3452 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 (edited) @@belladonna, It would seemI missed it in my first post, so Welcome to the forum! Edited February 24, 2017 by Stosh Link to post Share on other sites
Back Pack 431 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 @@Back Pack Sorry, but I think David CO was making a humorous reference to the screen name chosen. "Belladonna" is a highly toxic poison. I must have missed the smiley face then. Always good to use those so people know you're joking. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
CNYScouter 46 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 Around here when a Scout make Eagle it's the usually parents who write and ask for congratulatory letters. There is nothing stopping you from writing and asking for these When my son made Eagle he made a list of people he wanted to get a letter from. Most have a way to contact them online and I just sent them his information asking for a congratulatory letter. Link to post Share on other sites
desertrat77 1144 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 @@desertrat77 Mike Rowe had to go to a copy of his signature since he got so many. You'll love his response for parents who gave him grief over it. https://www.facebook.com/TheRealMikeRowe/posts/1444289945581144:0 Thanks Back Pack, that made my day! Maybe I'm just getting old. But I don't understand the concept of collecting a bunch of letters from strangers. And in Mike's case, he's wire-brushed by parents because he wouldn't personally sign a letter! After all, their progeny is so very special that he, Mike Rowe, darn well better drop what he's doing and sign a doggone letter! Unbelievably tacky. To go out further on the limb, I'm fairly convinced that the standard 3 inch binder full of Eagle letters, stationed conveniently in the back of room on a conspicuous table for all to see, is created solely for the benefit of one person: Mom. And she's usually the one who ends up doing all of the work to get those letters too. Do yourself a favor and skip all of that. Enjoy the day. Unless things have changed recently, the Eagle kit comes with a letter from National, a certificate for the Eagle, and the medal, etc. Isn't this honorable enough? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Stosh 3452 Posted February 24, 2017 Share Posted February 24, 2017 I'd rather get a handwritten note from a friend saying "Congrats". These letters others get are from people the Eagle doesn't even know. These letters are going to end up in some scrapbook and looked at maybe a half dozen times and the Eagle's grandchildren aren't even know who these people are. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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