MB Counselor Issues

[vcrew66]

Looking for feedback:

 

Having been approved as a MBC, I've approached our local troop to offer my services. However, at this time, the only scout interested in any of the mb's I'm certified to teach is - my son!

 

Is it required by the BSA that I have to teach a group of scouts, or may I teach my son alone if no one else is interested? He's ready to go, the SM has approved it, and I haven't found any official BSA policies about having to teach a group.

 

Also, do we need to have another person present if we work on the mb's at home? My schedule would make it almost impossible otherwise!

 

Thanks...

[Lisabob]

I'm curious, what merit badge are we talking about here?

 

There is no formal rule barring you from working with your son. That said, many troops discourage the practice under most circumstances. Part of the purpose of the merit badge program is to help kids get to know a range of adults (the adult association method of scouting), and working with mom & dad doesn't further that purpose. Not to mention that even the merest whiff of favoritism can be extremely problematic in a troop. That's not to suggest that you would actually treat your kid any differently than someone else's kid - but perception matters sometimes.

 

So, if it is a common merit badge for which there are lots of counselors in your area, I'd say you might want to encourage your son to find another person to work with. That way he gets the benefit of multiple views on the topic at hand. (For example, I counsel some of the citizenship badges. My son already knows how I think about a lot of the issues involved. He'd benefit from hearing other perspectives.)

 

On the other hand, if it is an uncommon MB for which qualified counselors are tough to find, go for it.

[packsaddle]

Ideally the boys decide which MBs they want to pursue. Then they speak to the SM and a decision is made as to which counselor. At that time you would be contacted by the boy with his request.

 

OK, that's not the way it often works in practice. IMHO it is best NOT to do the MBs in groups, although such seems common practice. But if you do it with a single boy, you do need to have another person present (parent preferably). They don't have to be involved but I've had them sit in because they were interested (Oceanography, for example).

You and the boy can arrange to do this in whatever venue works best.

It's possible that your newness to the scene, combined with some historical inertia will make things go slowly. That's OK. Just make yourself available and let them decide.

[Hal_Crawford]

We had an issue a few years ago. A new dad/scouter in the unit signed up to be a merit badge counselor for a large number of merit badges. It seemed unusual at the time but there was no rule against it and he presented solid creds for all the (80+) merit badges so I as CC signed off and the district merit badge czar did as well. This was mistake number 1.

 

At the time I advised him not to counsel his own son... no rule against it but it is bad practice.

 

At the time our merit badge procedures were sort of loosey goosey. Scouts found their own counselors and then brought the blue card to the scoutmaster. Sometimes it was a blue card already signed off as completed by the merit badge counselor. Since no one had abused this system no one thought much about it. Soon the new counselor's son brought in a completed blue card for a MB signed off by his dad. The SM accepted it. Mistake #2. Soon there was another, and another. When concerns were raised the question was always a "is there a rule against it?" "No, but it is bad practice". "But there is no rule against it". The MBC was retired fromd a government agency based in Northern Virginia, had a very strong personality and did not take no for an answer.

 

You can guess how this turned out. Soon there was a 14 year old scout with 21 merit badges. Some were from summer camp, many from his dad and one or two from another troop MBC. By this time the concerns had moved to the district level with scouters lining up on both sides. Issues got personal. There were angry e-mails, arguments in the hall outside the district RT. It was ugly with a capital U.

 

Ultimately the kid quit scouts before earning Eagle. He was a nice kid and really wasn't the problem. Collateral damage.

 

As a result of all this we learned that the SM should be the gatekeeper for merit badges. No one starts a merit badge without the SM assigning the counselor. The district no has a limit on how many MBs one can counsel. Lessons learned the hard way.

 

vcrew, I doubt you would do things like the MBC above but please... avoid any appearance of impropriety and don't counsel your son.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[kenk]

Its been well documented that Scouts may use their fathers as as merit badge counselors, so long as the fathers are registered as MBCs.

 

MBCs must follow youth protection measures, so they need to avoid one-on-one counseling, but, of course, this would not apply to the MBC's own son. Two-deep leadership is technically only required on "trips and outings", and not necessarily for meetings, including MBC sessions.

 

Still, if I'm the only adult leader present, I prefer to have another adult present, and if not, I prefer to have at least two non-related youth present (not counting my son as one of them). That's just my preferences though.

 

In my view it is OK to be the MBC for your own son. Make sure he follows the same requirement expectations as would any other Scout - not more and not less.(This message has been edited by kenk)

[Eagle92]

I have to ditto what others have said. Unless you are a specialty MBC, i.e nuclear science, Vet Med, that has few to no MBC, I would not work with your son.

 

Now if you are the only MBC in the area, I would do something along the following

 

1) have a small group work on the MB with your son that way no sense of favortism can be exerted.

 

2) work with your son and have him do all the work, BUT have him

present it to some else who for approval. Every unit/distict/

council is different and some will allow the SM or CC to sign off

on the MB, others it's the district adavncement chair.

[SR540Beaver]

vcrew66,

 

I would avoid being MBC for your son. In our troop, we don't allow it except in one situation. We periodically will offer a merit badge as a class. These are usually Eagle required MB's where we want to ensure the quality of instruction and are always done on a day different from troop meetings or outings. When an MBC is teaching the MB as a class, their son can participate. Outside that, we don't allow their parent to be their MBC. Same goes for Scoutmaster Conferences and BOR's. An ASM will do the SM conference for the SM's two sons and a parent can't sit on their own sons BOR. As Lisa basically said, in many cases, perception is reality. You might not do anything wrong, but if you put your self in that situation, you could be accused. I would advise my son to seek out a different MBC as that is part of the design of the whole MB process.

[dg98adams]

In our Troop, as new adults come in, they are offered MBC forms.

 

So we have a mix of MBC's. There is some over lap, and some not. I am the only Swimming/Lifesaving/Computers MBC for the Troop (I'm a YMCA & BSA Lifeguard, & Computer Scientist), but I have signed up for others that are also covered like Auto Mechanics, home repair, etc....I have avoided other Eagle required MB's since we already have most covered. My son worked his "swimming" at camp, but I would have held him to the same book requirements as the others in the Troop I did over the winter at the Y.

 

I am also the organizer for the district merit badge trail drive. My son took "Computers" with a mixed group, but I was the MBC, again the same requirements.

 

In our Troop we make an effort to have more than 1 MBC when we work on group-things that can apply to Troop outings. Canoe trips, ski trips, climbing, etc...

 

We do have a policy that the SM has to approve a Scout starting a MB, and an ASM provides the card, and enters the info into the Troop Master and prepares advancement reports.

[John-in-KC]

ACP&P has no rule against us counseling our own children.

 

I've known parents who MB counseled their kids... and it sure looked like they pencil-whipped the app.

 

Yes, I did the counseling and facilitated EagleSons learning for a couple MBs, but when it came time for test and signoff, another counselor did that.

 

Frankly, Adult Association Method works better if another adult can do the MB with one's own son.

 

Good safe Scouting practices mean working with at least 2 kids, and working someplace where 2-deep is clearly in evidence. I've done more than a couple MBs at IHOP just for that reason.

 

As someone else noted, when a boy says he wants to begin a MB, the SM has the responsibility to assign a Counselor.

[eisely]

I concur with the other posts that counseling one's own son is to be avoided, depending on the full circumstances. I would do so only with the full knowledge and concurrence of other responsible leaders in the troop.

 

An example of a special circumstance is when I performed as MB counselor for Canoeing MB on canoe treks. I did this for two of my sons on different treks. There were other scouts on those treks who also earned the MB. It was an ideal opportunity to add a MB to an outing and I was the only qualified adult on the outings. I discussed it ahead of time with other leaders and there was not a problem.

[NeilLup]

Hello,

 

An important point of the Merit Badge program -- arguably more important than the skills knowledge of the specific merit badge -- is the process of contacting a stranger, talking with them, arranging approval, etc.

 

As others have said, unless it is a very unique merit badge, your son will gain that benefit only if he contacts someone else.

 

Perhaps sadly, the merit badge program isn't for you. It's for the kids. It is a shame if you don't have any kids to work with but that happens. I had it happen to me.

[CalicoPenn]

Lets cut to the bottom line.

 

You're a Merit Badge Counselor.

 

Your son wants to earn one or more of the badges that you counsel.

 

Your son's Scoutmaster approves of you as the counselor for your son.

 

There is no official policy that states a parent can't counsel his/her own son.

 

So what's the issue? Despite lot's of advice from foks who suggest you shouldn't do so, there is no policy that say's you can't and the Scoutmaster approves - and your son is taking a risk that you'll actually be tougher on him that you might for someone who isn't your son (which, in my experience happens far more often that a parent being more lenient).

 

So what to do? Go for it - and enjoy the time with your son (heck, it's not bad practice for when someone else might come calling). If your son starts to rave about how much great stuff he learned doing the merit badge, you just might get more people from his troop interested too.

 

Calico

[evmori]

I agree that counseling ones own son for MB's should be avoided. While everything might be on the up & up, there is always that chance something will be questioned & there is no point putting a boy in that position.(This message has been edited by evmori)

[scottteng]

I agree it just does not look real good if they get to a District Eagle BOR and their parent is MBC for a majority of their badges. I am the parent of a 14 year old with at last check 35 merit badges. I have counseled him on exactly one that being Reading and if you are familiar with it it is not the most difficult to earn especially as I am also his main teacher as we home school. I made him work for it and in a sense he still is working on reading as I did not let him stop when he finished the MB requirements. He does not really want to take any more MB's from me says other counselors especially camp ones are much more user friendly.

[scottteng]

I agree it just does not look real good if they get to a District Eagle BOR and their parent is MBC for a majority of their badges. I am the parent of a 14 year old with at last check 35 merit badges. I have counseled him on exactly one that being Reading and if you are familiar with it it is not the most difficult to earn especially as I am also his main teacher as we home school. I made him work for it and in a sense he still is working on reading as I did not let him stop when he finished the MB requirements. He does not really want to take any more MB's from me says other counselors especially camp ones are much more user friendly.