Jump to content

wdfa89

Members
  • Content Count

    87
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    3

wdfa89 last won the day on August 1 2018

wdfa89 had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

65 Excellent

About wdfa89

  • Rank
    Junior Member

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Not Telling

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. wdfa89

    OA Camping Qualifications

    I agree w/all the perspectives offered. I would also offer this is eligibility to stand for election, not membership to OA itself so I might be inclined to lean towards putting them on the ballot--if these are the 2 days they need to make 20 their peers will know, or their overall participation w/the troop, and will make the appropriate assessment on their worthiness. I absolutely believe in standards and not reading more/less into requirements or adding/subtracting as well but in my humble opinion (and as an ASM and advancement chair) I feel sometimes (and absolutely NOT saying this is what is happening here) we adults act as if we are awarding the MoH and I tried to come down on the side of what is most beneficial to the scout. Again, not to lower standards or make things easier than they are supposed to but I know how motivating various honors and.or recognitions can be (and 25 years in the military adds to this opinion) and I tend to go more not less. but just an opinion from an anonymous guy on the internet.
  2. wdfa89

    Investiture Ceremony?

    We had the same problem/issue/expense. Now we hand out Troop numbers at the Xover and when they make Scout w/ the Troop they get their necker and slide. A little less grand of a welcome but the costs of no shows was unsustainable as we were getting 15 or so Xovers a year and probably only netting 8 or so after a few months.
  3. wdfa89

    How to deal with a difficult leader?

    alrighty then. my apologies. I must have read your post wrong or more into it than was there.
  4. wdfa89

    How to deal with a difficult leader?

    You lost me here. The other stuff (well except for the phone) is, I guess possibly open for discussion on the best way to deal with the boys. anyway until he is removed his opinion could be considered. But I am a grown up. No one is going to tell me where to tent, let alone that I must tent with another adult. Certainly ig f that isn't the previously established policy/procedure (which I could then opt out of an event if I do not wish to comply). I would have told him to stuff it right then and there, or enjoy his big tent all by his lonesome. Actually you lost me at the "he gave me crap..." We are all volunteers here, trying to do our best. I am not taking any crap off another volunteer. good natured ribbing sure or useful. constructive criticism sure--I am not perfect and can learn plenty from more experienced folks. But genuine crap umm nope. Again, I am a grown up and unless we are in some official capacity where I sort of have to take it (and since retiring from the military I can't imagine that scenario anymore) I am not going to suffer fools who think they are in charge very well. I would have had zero problems asking him to kill the phone or go to his car if he has to watch. Our troop has a zero electronic policy at scout events (other than calling home if needed). The grown ups try real hard to set the example on that. The language would be a no brainer to me. Again no problem going to the mattresses straight away on that. But if not losing him (and his boy) outweighs the other stuff then I think you are hosed. You have surrendered the leverage and are stuck IMO.
  5. I think it is about scholarships. The irony is except for the revenue sports like men's FB and BB there are very few full scholly's available. Except for a few truly exceptional folks in the non rev you might be looking at a partial. And the coach cares not a lick about your academics beyond staying eligible. Many friends whoi had kids play a D1 sport and it was a like a job. they hated the sport by the time they finished or at best saw it as a means to an end. The joy was long gone. My oldest was a pretty good softball player but no way she could get an athletic scholarship. However her ACT brought in plenty of scholarships. Academics usually is the best (and easiest to control) in getting help paying. Scouts is our Alamo. We will dump any/all other activities before we let that go. It is the only activity, or one of the few, where your participation isn't linked to performance. You are allowed to fail. Strike out 3 times--grab the pine. Dump your kayak 3 times--when you are done laughing w/ your buds get back in and try again. My kid loves soccer/baseball but I have never seen him smile like he did at summer camp out on the lake w/ his buds. And scouts, when done right, is one of the few activities where the adults sit over there and let the boys do their thing, work out their disputes, enjoy the moment, and not get "helped" until they ask. No refs, no "coaches" projecting their hopes/dreams/past failures on the kids hoping a big league GM sees their masterful coaching and offers them a gig w/ the big club. And any kid--rich or poor--can participate. In fact, we will help equip a poor kid if need be, with good stuff. Try getting anyone on a travel team to let a teammate use this years $350 carbon fiber bat.
  6. Parent first. do what is necessary to protect your kid. And based on what I have read this PLC/SPL is cabal of future kavanaughs. You may be the SM but I wouldn't take that as a suicide pact for your family. I wouldn't waste a lot of time worrying about how best to make sure these boys learn and grow--that can be their parent's (and someday probably state appointed counselors) job. And if they care the CC/DE/COR. There is a rot if the SPL would do this and no one on the PLC would stop it and, in fact, just laughed. Not going to be surprised when the parents of these little angels claim 'wasn't my kid' or 'he would never do this' or figure how to blame your son. In my experience misifts like this are usually enabled at home. IMO this troop is toast. Even if this is resolved in the most favorable manner to you and your son, are you ever going to trust these boys--alone w/ your son. And would you if it isn't resolved in a favorable manner. I am all for teaching and learning and helping boys become good men but I learned some hard lessons as a commander--there is a difference between a mistake and a crime. This may or may not be a crime but it sure isn't a mistake. If it were my son, we would be gone and I would be looking for maximum accountability (in any and all appropriate forums) for the future defendants.
  7. wdfa89

    Council Merger

    we were in the council that last merged w/ gslac (lewis and clark). at the troop level I would be hard pressed to say there is a discernible impact beyond a changing council strips--especially for the boys. I think any "conflict" has been at the adult scouter level and in that respect gslac is the daddy rabbit and they run the show--on the other hand a fair amount of dead weight imo was cleared out of the l&c side of the river. and we now have better access to all of the programs/resources on the mo side. there has not been a wholesale closing of camps. i think one was tferred to the Y or some other non profit but that was in motion prior and made sense from an facility mx/upgrade & use perspective. Even the OA hand wringing about shutting down our lodge has been staved off for the foreseeable future. not saying this new merger is a good idea or will turn out same, but I reckon unless you are a wheel in the adult scouter system it will be fairly transparent.
  8. ok it wasnt just me. I saw and thought same things. to be expected, of course. looking forward to the Boys now welcome in Boy Scouting issue ha ha ha
  9. wdfa89

    Would you say anything

    didn't think you were flip at all and I have seen and recognize the power and utility of redemption, forgiveness, and second chances. MattR has raised some very good points as well. and I appreciate your perspective as well. It really gets down to if one thinks a person has the will and capacity to change/reform and/or the faith the PTB will ensure corrections will be made--and if you have the patience to let that play out--hard to do when it's your kid for sure. BL: hope for the best outcomes but have a plan for the worst ones.
  10. wdfa89

    Would you say anything

    not necessarily. depends on the bad choice. and you don't get to learn on my kid. I really don't feel the need to provide another opportunity for someone to screw up with my kid. and I really don't want that to happen to others either
  11. wdfa89

    Would you say anything

    I wasn't clear--he doesn't have to leave the troop, as you said his kid is in there, but he does need to leave his position. He needn't have any interaction with any boy other than his son. He needn't wear a uni again IMO. But as hard as it would be, if he pulls this again and the Troop doesn't follow thru (and quite frankly, he shouldn't be in a position to do this again so I think you have a problem already) and you can't be there all the time to protect your kid (I get it--I have a job and 2 other kids and my own life) then you have to consider all of your options if the troop has made their choice.
  12. wdfa89

    Would you say anything

    I wouldn't be very patient on this. I would speak directly w/ the SM and/or CC, possibly the CO rep if the CO is involved in the Troop (some are/some aren't). The yelling and screaming (coupled w/prior behavior) has no place and this "asm" no longer needs to have a role or presence at Troop activities IMO (again assuming the facts as presented in the thread are 100% correct and no reason to think otherwise). I would ensure I was present at any activity where my son and this guy were present. I would strongly consider changing units if the Troop isn't going to remove this person. That is my official how to handle it scoutlike. Honestly, if it were my kid, this ASM and I would have a talk and that would be the last tiime he gets w/ 100 yards of my son let alone speak with him again.
  13. wdfa89

    Sloooooow advancement

    IMO he is not sloooooow at all. I am sure there are some faster, but I have boys who have been in the troop a couple years + who are still Scout or TF. They are happy and coming to events. all good. he is doing fine. I am an advancement chair and I see this quite a bit. It is a big adjustment, IMO, from Cubs where the parents/leaders make sure everything is signed off and the program runs on basically a syllabus to boy scouts where the boy needs to drive the accomplishment, and bring his book around (which means having the book, knowing what needs to get signed, and then getting it signed) it can take a year or so before they find their rhythm on that. Then it can go like gangbusters. Sometimes it takes motivation, like seeing all the cool stuff that only 1C and above are eligible for, or a couple buddies make rank. or they just enjoy the activities and fellowship and that is enough. as someone already said they all move at their own pace and define their own journey. now that doesn't mean every now and again you can't talk to him and ask how is it going, and, if he is interested talk about getting stuff signed off (for ex, my son did want to advance but sometimes needed a gentle reminder about what he did on the campout or who he might see at a meeting to get stuff signed--but arms, or farther, length direction--more about helping him learn the procedures then specifically directing actions)
  14. wdfa89

    Denied a court of honor.

    ok I have read this whole thing, really surprised at how fired up uninvolved, anonymous folks can get about stuff. If I were the OP....kid made eagle. he is entitled/deserves an ECOH. As a parent I absolutely see wanting to get that for him. So much so, I would see to it myself (which is how our Troop does it anyway). It is obvious there is some issue driving the cmte to not put the event on. I doubt you will ever get the answers you are looking for. I also doubt you will ever get them to do as you wish and/or put on the ceremony. And further, why would you want to force folks to do something you want to go well against their will. do you really think they would, under duress and quite resentful, deliver the special ceremony your son deserves? I would swallow my anger and move on. Invite the Troop. who wants to come will come. I am not saying you are wrong for being angry, or wanting an explanation, etc. I am not even saying there are 2 sides. I will accept your version as the whole/complete unfiltered truth. it doesn't matter. You are not going to get what you want and I just can't see it is worth the high BP to get it. Even if you were to "prevail," whatever that would mean, I think it would be a hollow victory. A crap ceremony by folks who still would find your son unworthy. who need/wants that. Forget the Troop and give your son the ceremony you think he deserves. Life is just to doggone short and this is supposed to be fun/enjoyable. maybe I have mellowed, and there probably was a time when I would have relished going to the mattresses over something like this but in the end it is just a waste of time and detracts from what actually matters here.
  15. wdfa89

    Required Worksheets?

    Our troop does Scout BoRs. We know and acknowledge it is not a requirement. If any Scout or Parent points that out and says they will not we would not argue the point or hold a grudge. As adv chair I do not hide the fact it is not rqd and tell parents as such. We do it to give the boys additional opportunities to practice a) sched/attending the BoR, coming in full uni w/ their book, speaking w/ the panel and an opportunity to provide the troop feedback on their journey to that point--especially since these are our newest scouts. It also gets our adults a chance to meet our new scouts and it is great way for me to increase my pool of adults and train parents on BoRs. And I explain that to all my new parents, again pointing out while what we are doing is additional/optional--it is not required and their kid is a scout after the SM conf. We have not held up any kid because we couldn't/wouldnt get a scout bor done.
×