MBC, parents nearby

[GKlose]

Stosh tells an interesting story about counseling a Scout in Bugling MB, but with a parent nearby.

 

It reminded me of a story about one of my experiences, not long after I started as an MBC -- so I was pretty much a rookie.

 

Turns out it was a teen, but a new Scout. Had just joined a troop and was working on his first MB. This was for Photography MB, maybe the first time I'd counseled it. I offered to meet the Scout at his home, because he said they were digital pictures and that I figured it would be easier to see his work that way. His parents were both there, and in some ways, it felt like at first I was counseling all of them, because none of them had been through a merit badge before.

 

But the experience was so much better than that. It became really obvious that dad was a talented amateur photographer, who did his digital processing in Aperture (the Apple Photoshop-like program), and produced coffee table books from his work. It was also obvious, from the photos, that the two of them would go around and take pictures together. We started talking about all sorts of things, and I think I probably picked up as much from dad as they did from me. It was really a fun experience, and I left wishing that I'd be invited on one of their shoots sometime.

 

Then there was another time -- I was invited to a small, Cooking-themed camporee to counsel a few Scouts on Cooking merit badge that weekend. One Scout was profoundly disabled, but was still working on it, with his dad there, helping keep him focused, and more or less hand-holding him through the process. But at one point, the dad and I went off into a discussion about nutrition. He seems to read as much as I do, and had read several books on nutrition that I haven't read (and he hadn't read some of the ones that I have). I'm glad he spoke up -- there again, I think I was learning in the process too.

 

I've also been present when my sons have met with counselors. I always vow to remain completely quiet, and away from the action, unless the counselor addresses a question to me directly.

 

Guy

 

 

[qwazse]

I think there's a distinction between substance and form. In both instances, the parents were bring up discussions on content (rather than dickering about the meaning of the word "report").

[moosetracker]

If starting the Family Life merit Badge with a scout, I like to ask a parent attend the first meeting. This is so that the parent as well as the scout hears what the SCOUT must do, and understands that the FAMILY must be involved in family project, and the family meeting.. Along with other things like I always suggest that when the Scout comes to the part of discribing their own worth to the family, they ask their family the question. It is hard to toot your own horn, and the family can see values in you that you may never had even thought you performed for them. Also a parent has to approve the individual project the scout does for the family..

 

The Family is so included in that, it just seems a good idea to make sure both scout and parent(s) understand when to get involved, and when to let the scout do their own thing.

 

Don't have any stories where the parents floored me with their knowledge on the subject. Not that I am so wonderful, just parents did not show that much of an interest in the subject.

 

PS.. You can now stop beating up on son & fiance. I feel bad they took so much heat for that.. As Beav.. said it is a normal mistake people will do at least once, weather at a MB session, or in not backing another leader when you should stand together.. Other mistakes were made that night.. I also made a mistake on how I wrote it up on the forum, that put so much heat on them. You learn, you move on..(This message has been edited by moosetracker)

[Tampa Turtle]

I have actually said "Dad you can stand over there and I will send him over when I am done with him." Takes practice, at least for me.

[Stosh]

There is always a delicate balance between what some parent/outsider has to offer and whether or not their expertise is welcomed into the MB conversation.

 

This example is not related to MB per se, but it does give a good lesson. As a reenactor, I attend events other than my passion (American Civil War) and there was one occasion where a reenactor was explaining in a seminar, the uniform worn by the Waffen SS soldier in Germany during WW II. After the presentation he asked if there were any questions or comments. One elderly gentleman offered up a bit of advice as to how one piece of equipment was worn which was contrary to the reenactor's presentation. The reenactor politely let the spectator know that after extensive research, photographs, diaries, etc. that this new information was not correct. The gentleman stood there quietly and just smiled. The reenactor thought that reaction to be strange and asked the man where he came about his research. The spectator simply said, in WW II he was a Waffen SS soldier.

 

After that I have always started every MB session with the question "Why are you taking this MB". Many times I have found that it's because the family is involved in the topic and I then use that interest for the boy to add information from his personal experience into the lessons and or parents are allowed a comment or two in the discussion. If he is just taking it because he's interested that's a whole different story and the family may not be interested in getting involved in the process.

 

Keep it mind that MB's aren't just for scouts, too. I had a group of canoeist/kayakers heading up to BWCA for a week. They came to me because I was a SM and asked if I could give them lessons on maps and compasses a skill they would be needing for the trip. I bought a MB Orienteering booklet for each person and taught the MB. They thought it was great!

 

If the only reason one takes a MB to get a check mark in their BSA handbook, please disregard this posting. On the other hand if the reason a scout is taking the MB because it's a stepping stone towards more current family involvement, potential own family involvement, friends, clubs or organizations he may join some day. Then one might want to store this information in the back your mind for future reference.

 

Stosh