About those eagle Scout parents

[Bob58]

So I finished reading the e-mail from a Star Scout Mom that started "**** has completed his six months of service its time to arrange for a Board of Review...." Third, she copied the whole troop, second, if I'm not mistaken there is the question of a Scoutmasters Conference, and FIRST... why isn't her son making this request! He is the Senior Patrol Leader, is suposed to set the weekly agenda and does routinely ask if anyone needs a SM confernce or BoR.

 

Mom insists loudly & often that "**** will be an Eagle like @@@@@@." (A much older & self-motivated family friend (?) who is now teaching after earning his Eagle and a BA & MA from Ivy league schools.)

 

I'm in favor of buying an extra pin giving it to the mom for the mom & letting the son...

 

Sorry, Any advice...

 

 

[Stosh]

Maybe you can get a moderator to move this thread over to an appropriate category.

 

On the other hand, what do you do with parents that do the same thing for the Arrow of Light for their Webelos boy?

 

Stosh

[evmori]

Earning the AOL & earning Eagle are not even remotely the same. AOL is a Cub award & parents are encouraged to be involved. Eagle is a Boy Scout award & parents are encouraged to encourage their sons. Big difference.

 

How about not scheduling anything until the Scout asks for it!

 

Ed Mori

1 Peter 4:10

[Hunt]

"So I finished reading the e-mail from a Star Scout Mom that started "**** has completed his six months of service its time to arrange for a Board of Review...." Third, she copied the whole troop, second, if I'm not mistaken there is the question of a Scoutmasters Conference, and FIRST... why isn't her son making this request! He is the Senior Patrol Leader, is suposed to set the weekly agenda and does routinely ask if anyone needs a SM confernce or BoR."

 

Respond: "It's great that Johnny is progressing so well! He can talk to the SM about scheduling." Repeat as necessary.

[FScouter]

How would the boy know that the troop adults expect him to arrange for a BOR? The boy's Handbook tells him "your Scoutmaster will arrange a board of review for you" (for Tenderfoot) and is silent for the other ranks.

[Stosh]

evmori:

 

While the Eagle and AOL may have different emphasis, the comparison I was referring to was that in both cases the award can be and often times is earned by the parent and not the boy, regardless of how the program was set up to accomplish.

 

Derby cars are supposed to be built with adult cooperation, but we all know that expectation falls short of it's intended goal as well.

 

Parents who get away with this in cubbing follow their boys all the way through and expect to get it done for their boy doing their Eagle. Unless the interference is stopped early, it will be genuinely difficult once the boy gets to the upper ranks of Boy Scouting.

 

There's a markedly different ideal between encouraging a boy to do something and doing it for him. I've seen AOL parents just as agressive as Eagle candidate parents.

 

Stosh

 

[Eagledad]

>>How would the boy know that the troop adults expect him to arrange for a BOR? The boy's Handbook tells him "your Scoutmaster will arrange a board of review for you" (for Tenderfoot) and is silent for the other ranks.

[evmori]

jblake47,

 

My point in Cubs parents are more directly involved that they are in Boy Scouts.

 

How would he know to ask for a BOR or SM Conference? Maybe that is how his (and most) units handle it? Just a guess.

 

Ed Mori

1 Peter 4:10

[Stosh]

Ed,

 

Yes, you are correct. However, there tends to be an abuse of that especially as the boy rounds out his Cub experience. I would think that in Tiger, Wolf and Bear a lot of interaction between the boy and parents. This would show the boy the development of skills and help parents to understand the Cub program. However, as the Cubs move into Webelos, the parents need to begin encouraging their boys to be more independent while still being close. The Boys need to do more and more "on their own" and parents need to step back.

 

When this process doesn't happen and the parents are as involved with their Webelos as if they were Tigers, there's something wrong. When you have boys earn ALL the Webelos pins, AOL and everything Cubbing has to offer and the boy does not cross over to Boy Scouts, there's something wrong. When the first year Boy Scout can't go to camp the first year because dad can't get the week off from work, there's something wrong.

 

I'm not contradicting what you are emphasizing Ed, but by the time a Cub reaches Webelos II, there should be a substantial amount of independence built up so the boy will feel more comfortable about his new opportunities. This, of course, requires a lot of parental support to make this happen and that parental support comes in the stepping back and let the boy try out his wings.

 

Stosh

[evmori]

Stosh,

 

You are absolutely correct. By the time a boy reaches Webelos, he should be able to fend for himself more & mom & dad should back off more. It seems this doesn't happen & carries over to Boy Scouts.

 

I think we need to remember that a Cub can earn the AOL without earning all the lower ranks while a Boy Scout must earn all the ranks before Eagle.

 

Ed Mori

1 Peter 4:10

[scoutldr]

In a perfect scout troop, the PL will know when the scouts in his patrol are ready for a SM conference or BOR. He should pass this info to the SPL at the PLC. The SPL then schedules it with the SM, who coordinates the BOR with the troop CC.

 

In a perfect world...Mom has no role in ANY of this.

[CA_Scouter]

Hey, I've got an idea.

 

Next time a parent asks for a SM conference or BoR, kindly oblige by arranging one FOR THE PARENT. Do not include the scout.