Sm or ASM signing off on own child?

[joeleeper]

Is this ok?

 

This is my sons first year in Boy Scouts.

I am a registered ASM, and have signed up to be a MB Counselor for many Merit Badges.

I have avoided Counseling my own sons Merit Badges because I didn't want him to be questioned on this when he gets higher in rank.

 

I haven't found anything written in stone saying you cannot, but I did not want to cause problems for him later.

 

Thank you,

Joe Leeper

[nldscout]

Not onlty is it approved for you to coucil your own son, its in the advancement R&R as being ok

[evmori]

Joe,

You are permitted to sign-off on your son's merit badges. There is no BSA regulation saying you can't. I do feel like you do and what you are doing is perfectly OK.

 

Ed Mori

Troop 1

1 Peter 4:10

[joeleeper]

nldscout-"its in the advancement R&R as being ok"

 

What is the Advancement R&R?

 

Joe Leeper

[FScouter]

From the book Advancement Committee Policies and Procedures #33088D:

"An approved merit badge counselor may counsel any youth member, including his or her own son, ward, or relative."

[joeleeper]

Thank you

 

Joe Leeper

[acco40]

The only requirement that a family member (father/son) can't sign off is for the Board of Review.

 

Now what is allowed and what is good practice is debatable. I am a Scoutmaster (SM) and a merit badge counselor (MBC)and while I have signed off as a MBC on some of my sons MBs and a few rank requirements, I have not given them SM conferences because I feel that I do that anyway (informally) at home and that they need to get in the habit of interacting with other adults. Not all agree with that approach mind you.

[EagleInKY]

Like you, I have a son in the troop as well. I try to avoid signing off his requirements as much as possible. In fact, all of our ASMs are that way. They'll do it when they need to, but if someone else is available, they'd prefer them to handle it.

 

Unfortunately, even though the majority of us live by that first point in the Scout Law, there are those that don't trust us. Not just us, they usually don't trust anyone. You'll eventually run up against that parent that thinks you are favoring your son. If you've avoided signing off on things for him, it just makes it that much easier to defend yourself.

[Torveaux]

I find a similar undercurrent as a WDL. My son is just more interested in Scouting and his advancement than most of his Den. In all honesty, I expect more from him vis-a-vis meeting his requirements than do the other parents. The way I see it, the point of the requirements is for him to learn something, not simply to mark off items toward a badge.

 

It seems that from talking to most (not all) other leaders, it is not uncommon for leaders as parents to expect more. Now, this can go too far as well and as it applies to the Merit Badges the leader/parent must be a bit more even-handed as the other parents do not have the authority to 'sign-off'.

 

If anyone complains, I suggest handing them an adult leadership form and the dates of the next training sessions in your district.

[EagleInKY]

Actually, Torveaux, most of the ones who complain are the last ones you'd want to be involved in the leadership of your troop. The complainers I've run across share the same traits. (1) Socially immature sons who do not interact well with others. Sometimes the problem is medical, while others are just immature. (2) Have a desire for their son to get special treatment. I know he's not First Class, but he wants to be SPL... etc.

 

IMHO, if they get in charge, they will make the exceptions for their child. In one case I know of, one of these folks took over as CM. Lots of questionable things happened after that.

 

As a SM with a son in the troop, and as a son of a SM himself, I can honestly say that the majority of us are harder on our sons than on anyone else. But I'll also say that I believe 4 out of 5 SM/ASM sons are the cream of the crop in the troop. Why is that? I'm not sure. Perhaps it is that - since mom or dad is so involved - they are as well. Perhaps it is that they get a greater understanding of the overall program because they get it at home too. Perhaps the apple just doesn't fall far from the tree. Not sure, but it sure seems to be the case.

[Lynda J]

In our troop we don't sign off on our own childs rank advancement. We all agreed to this. It just looks better to me. Less chance for someone to complain along the way.

 

As far as merit badges. I do counsel Kevin. In fact he is working at the shop this summer and working on Auto Mechanics. He has it almost finished. Right now he is removing the radiator on a Mercedes 300E.

[ASM59]

Although perfectly acceptable to sign off on your own sons advancements, I tend to agree with some here that this may not be the best practice. If you look in my sons handbook, youll find only a few Tenderfoot requirements signed off by me (one of our Troops ASMs). There are no Second, First, Star, or Life requirements signed off by me. This is pretty much a rule of thumb that we use in our Troop. I am a Counselor for 8 merit badges, but I have counseled my own son in only 2 merit badges in his 4 years as a Boy Scout. I agree with EagleInKY that not everyone looking at my sons handbook would trust that he did the work if Dad signed off on most or all of his requirements.

 

A side note; I take it one step further, in that on outings I tend to let one of the other Scoutmasters attend to any direction or discipline that my son may need. In doing so, no one can say there is favoritism and my son does not feel like I am riding him the whole time on outings (which would be the case as I would expect so much more out of him).

 

Just my thoughts

 

ASM59

 

[DonM]

Our troop also has an informal agreement that parents don't sign off on advancements or Eagle required merit badges for their own boys. This discourages the occasional parent who wants to speed their boy through. Still, if someone pushes it, we would allow it to be done.

 

In smaller troops, this can be impossible, though, as you may not have enough qualified MB councellors.

 

And I do sign-off (and perform) the SM conference on my boys although I have them go to an ASM for a seperate conference as well.

[SWScouter]

ASM59 wrote, "I tend to let one of the other Scoutmasters attend to any direction or discipline that my son may need. In doing so, no one can say there is favoritism and my son does not feel like I am riding him the whole time on outings."

 

I think this can be a two edged sword. On the one hand, it may accomplish what ASM59 suggests, but on the other, it may appear that the son is favored because the son seems to get away without discipline while the other boys don't. I think this warrants a careful balance.

 

SWScouter

[Torveaux]

Actually, EagleinKY, I expect that those same types will beg-off any attempt to get them to committ their time and energy to the Troop/Pack.

 

You are right, of course, that if they accepted it would be worse.

 

I find that people who bend/break the rules tend to be the first ones to accuse others of doing the same.

 

You are also spot-on about the kids of leaders. Rather a chicken-egg sort of thing to a degree. In some cases (like mine) the parent gets involved heavily because it is important to the boy. My brother-in-law is an Eagle, has 3 Eagle brothers, is and SM and son of an SM. His boys are well on their way to Eagle as well and are fine young men. Is is genetics? Is it environmental? I guess all we can do is provide the best program we can and try to move more of the slacker-types into the category of productive citizens.

 

Hmmm...perhaps that could be some good lesson material for various 'Citizen' badges.