Laurie

The BSA did not receive and distribute child porn. One individual working for the BSA pleaded guilty to doing so during an investigation. There is a big difference, and though one individual's actions may reflect on the BSA, we can do something about that. We can say we don't agree with the type of activity Mr. Smith is alleged to have taken part in, and we can continue to deliver the program. One way to deal with public perception is to keep perspective and not shy away from telling others how good a program this is...even when something admittedly awful happens.

I've been thinking that it would be good to hear more before making a judgement. If this is true, then it is indeed a sad day for the BSA. No, the BSA as an organization did nothing wrong, but there are those who do judge a group by one person's actions. Perhaps it this article should be a reminder to us all that we need to use care in all we do, for what we do does reflect on the BSA.

As for the ACLU, I don't care for that organization, but I also don't see how they'd take this one man's alleged actions and somehow try to use it against the BSA.

Do you have a supportive CM, or would the CC be the better person to ask to help with this? I have had DLs come to me as CM to ask for help, and I have gone to the CC or CR for advice at times, so would this be appropriate?

Ok, then here's what I've done to help den leaders the past two years, and what they began to do on their own. If you don't already send home a den newsletter, this would be a good time to start one. You have the perfect opportunity, as you are approaching the time when Webelos badges will be completed and possibly earned. Put the requirements in the letter, and let the parents know that reviews will be done during the den meetings. Keep it simple, but this puts every family on the same page, and it does not put you in the middle of this family issue. Do you see something like this working?

p.s. I agree with Eamonn. This mom is not a help if she's not willing to follow the program -- and she isn't if she's expecting her son to advance without completing certain requirements.

Edit: I agree with Bob; his advice is better yet. Do let the parents know of the possible roadblocks. So many don't know, and it is clear that this is an issue that this family needs to be aware of.(This message has been edited by Laurie)

The most recent requirments for the Arrow of Light Award:

1. Be active in your Webelos den for at least 6 months since completing the fourth grade (or for at least six months since becoming 10 years old), and earn the Webelos badge.

2. Show your knowledge of the requirements to become a Boy Scout by doing all of these:

* Repeat from memory and explain in your own words the Scout Oath or Promise and the 12 points of the Scout Law. Tell how you have practiced them in your everyday life.

* Give and explain the Scout motto, slogan, sign, salute, and handclasp.

* Understand the significance of the Scout badge. Know its parts and tell what each stands for.

* Tell how a Boy Scout uniform is different from a Webelos Scout uniform.

* Tie the joining knot (square knot)

3. Earn five more activity badges in addition to the three you already earned for the Webelos badge. These must include:

Fitness (already earned for the Webelos badge)

Citizen (already earned for the Webelos badge)

Readyman

Outdoorsman

At least one from the Mental Skills Group

At least one from the Technology Group

Two more of your choice

See Webelos Handbook, page 74 for the activity badge groups.

4. With your Webelos den, visit at least

* one Boy Scout troop meeting,

* one Boy Scout-oriented outdoor activity.

(If you have already done this when you earned your Outdoorsman activity badge, you may not use it to fulfill requirements for your Arrow of Light Award requirements.)

5. Participate in a Webelos overnight campout or day hike.

(If you have already done this when you earned your Outdoorsman activity badge, you may not use it to fulfill requirements for your Arrow of Light Award requirements.)

6. After you have completed all five of the above requirements, and after a talk with your Webelos den leader, arrange to visit, with your parent or guardian, a meeting of a Boy Scout troop you think you might like to join. Have a conference with the Scoutmaster.

7. Complete the Honesty Character Connection.

* Know: Say the Cub Scout Promise to your family. Discuss these questions with them. What is a promise? What does it mean to keep your word? What does it mean to be trustworthy? What does honesty mean?

* Commit: Discuss these questions with your family. Why is a promise important? Why is it important for people to trust you when you give your word? When might it be difficult to be truthful? List examples.

* Practice: Discuss with a family member why it is important to be trustworthy and honest. How can you do your best to be honest even when it is difficult?

I had a family member come to me over this very issue. I still haven't a clue what the family religion is, but apparently the family was divided. I asked this person if the boy had been practicing his religion as his family taught it. Yes was the answer. I then asked if there was any reason the den leader couldn't ask this boy the very question I had just asked. Not a problem. I asked what was the concern. The family felt a particular faith might be needed, so it was a misunderstanding. I can't see this boy advancing if he has not completely requirements that are very clearly spelled out. Has the dad remained silent on this issue? Could this be a misunderstanding on the part of the mom?

The one thing I don't get about the uniform for camping is that it ends up covered up. Then no one can see the shirt, though the pants are still visible. I actually like the way the uniform holds up (except for the pilling at the collar), but it would be nice to be able to identify who is who in the cold weather--when the shirts usually get covered up.

I remember when our son first went into a troop, and then we he moved to a different troop. I had plenty of questions, but I didn't know who to direct them to. How about a "who to call for ____" list as well as a phone list. Also, since Cubs and Scouts is so different, a brief summary of the goals of the troop might help parents out. I was recently asked to work up something for this troop for new parents, but I haven't begun it yet. The above two items are at the top of the list. I'd love to use your list too--it covers a lot.

Congratulations to him, and I'm truly happy you two shared in this special achievement!!

Kristi, I don't have an app handy, but isn't only the CM signature required for a youth to join? The adult apps need a CC and CR or IH signature, but I thought the youth didn't need that. When I was CM, the CR was not at meetings, I knew he'd be at a troop meeting once a week, and we could meet for a few minutes to get his signature when necessary. He also would sign anything sent to him via postal mail, but that ended up not being necessary. Would these be options for you?

You are the CM, right? I never thought of the CM as having power, but rather as having the privilege of awarding the boys their advancements and helping in planning the pack meeting. Part of that was encouraging the den leaders too. Though I was the one who secured a CR for the unit I used to be in (at the request of the DE), and though I recruited people to leadership positions (but directed them to the CR and CC for an app and approval), there were some things I had to learn to let go. Regardless of whether the CR is CR or not, there could be the expectation of special treatment. There are families that are just like that. One thing that I found helped in the expectation of advancement, even when not earned, was to talk with the CC, ask for permission to share a problem I was having, and with permission, did this: I used the Cub Scout Leader Handbook as a reference, keeping it handy for anyone who wanted to look at it, and I told the committee (which always included DLs) that I found myself focusing too much on the award and not enough on the process, and that the following items helped me to regain focus. That led to a brief discussion, some print-outs of resources that brought the purpose of Cub Scouting to everyone's attention again, and then the DLs began to adjust some of what they were doing and to encourage parents as well. As CM, I felt this was the best thing I could do to help stop this problem. It was brought up at a pack meeting too, briefly, but in a positive way: I congratulated the boys on their hard work and thanked the parents for allowing me and the leadership team to work with them as they helped their sons reach their goals in Cubs. There will always be problems, some units having more than others, but how they are resolved makes a big difference. Hang in there, and try to have some fun. CM is a fun position--or can be

And... For those leaders (like the CR who may not attend all meetings), I asked the CC if someone would mail out materials shared during the committee meeting. I was asked if I would do so. This way everyone gets the same info. What they do with it is up to them, but there are resources to use that should help unify the leaders in keeping focus.(This message has been edited by Laurie)

ScoutNut's right about the budget. I have drafted the budget twice for a pack, and it is not unusual to budget for only part of what a boy will earn and leave the rest to fundraising or donations or other ways of covering costs. The pack I was involved with did not draft a policy that funds could not be refunded, but some packs that I know of do this. This is why it is so hard to advise anyone from other units on how to deal with finance issues.

I'm happy to help and agree with FScouter in being sorry to hear of your experiences. Encourage your son, and use this as a teachable moment. I don't say this lightly. We've had some tough times, and your situation echoes some of what my own sons experienced, and I encouraged our sons to be sure to understand responsibilities that they may have in order to avoid disappointing others in the ways in which they've been disappointed. Good luck, and welcome to the forums.

The belt loops are not a restricted item. You could buy them yourself for your son. They cost about $1.25 each. If that is all he is missing at this point, perhaps it would be worth the expense to you to get them for him?

As for reimbursement, I'm afraid I can't help with that one.

Eamonn, thank you. I have no desire to work from behind the scenes though my "way back behind the scenes" could look that way. At this point, I'm just tying up loose ends, but along with the new CM and the CR together.

What I hope for is that the change in DE will lead to a change in thinking and that those who would like to stay in Cubs can do so, even after their youngest sons bridge. And Unc, I happen to be friends with the new DC (another change in the district), but I haven't told him that I miss Cubs. Maybe I should? Right now I'm putting together a CD for him of many items I had drafted over the past two years to help out the pack. He is interested in them, so it's nice to know that work done can continue to be helpful.

anarchist, what a fun time that must have been for you! As for feeling young, no worries there--I've an active 3-year-old at home, and so long as I can keep up with her, I remain impressed with my ability to get around at my old age (and according to my sons, at 40-something, I am wayyyy old!)

Thanks for the encouragement to stay involved. I am surprised at how much I miss Cubs. I knew I would, but due to some not-so-pleasant circumstances, I should be relieved to be done. Most people in the district move on from Cubs once their sons bridge. Then they stay with Boy Scouts for what seems like forever There seems to always be a shortage of Cub Scout leaders in any capacity due to turnover and bridging, so I had hoped that I could help in some way with that issue, but it's not to be. It was asked who told me I had to move on. The DE did, though he's now the former DE, so maybe this will change. Anyway, I posted here because I figured fellow Scouters would understand that my heart is with Cubs even when I no longer am.

Congratulations! And since it appears you and Eamonn are meeting up at Jambo, have a wonderful time celebrating together

Will you be planning camping trips and outdoor events for your den? If so, OWL would seem more appropriate for you.

BALOO is a more general outdoor course, mostly about planning. I took it but did not take OWL, so I can't compare the two. In my situation, BALOO was more appropriate and I suggested our WLs take OWL instead in the event of a conflict like yours.

Though my Cub Scout involvement came to an end almost a month ago, I must be going through withdrawal! I miss it. My sons and husband are actively involved in a troop, and I'm a committee member there, but my heart is with Cub Scouting still. There's little need for me in the troop, which I think is a good thing, for there are many active adults and even more active youth. I'm surprised at how much I miss the boys and the program planning. Watching a show with our daughter, I saw some very simply, inexpensive, but fun crafts and models that could be adapted for Cub use. I get questions still from the new leadership of the pack, and I love helping in seeking out ideas, solutions, whatever. For reasons best not to go into here, that particular unit is one that I do not have a future with except behind the scenes--way behind the scenes. Today I ran into a boy who is a Wolf, and he made a point of talking with me, talking to my daughter (he knew her name which totally blew me away), and asked about my son who recently bridged. He seemed to want to keep talking, but I had to go. Truth be told, I'd have liked to keep talking with him too. I was the CA and then CM, but the pack was small enough that I got to know every family. What surprised me is that this boy was very shy, didn't talk much, and yet today he sure did talk. I hope in some way I was a positive influence on him as well as the others. I wish I didn't miss Cubs so much too. My life is chaotic, it's just that busy, yet there's a special place in my heart for Cubs--specific ones and the program as a whole. It was not fun, not all the time, but it sure was worth the time.(This message has been edited by Laurie)

Now, you claimed there were some schools that didn't belong on that list, but you never told me which ones.

The point is moot now, anyway; the Illinois ACLU was able to use my list of 300 government charters in Illinois to send a letter to National to stop all such charters, and that's what the BSA is going to have to do.

So, would I be correct in understanding this to mean that it doesn't matter if the list was correct or not, so long at is served its intended purpose?

I would show the den leaders this resource, be willing to help them learn to use it(ie they don't have to use all of it but can choose elements), and let them know that this is for two reasons: it helps them spend less time planning and it helps with a theme for the pack meeting. I did this two years ago, and it is because I thought this looked helpful and because the den leaders were all working so hard with one common complaint: planning took too much time. The den leaders used parts of the program helps at first, but it took almost two years for the theme to catch on. The theme never did become a big part of the den meetings, but it helped with the pack meeting (props, skits, songs by dens).

I'm not following all of your post, but since Tiger Cubs must have an adult partner with them, wouldn't you be driving the Tiger friend along with his parent? That would eliminate the concern you have.

Dad...or Mom Funny story about this. Just this past week, I had the pleasure of providing an induction ceremony for the incoming CM as my last official Cubbing duty. One of the first things he did was to present our family with the BSA Family Award that we had earned this past year, so the whole family headed up front. After the closing, a parent came up to me and said he had no idea that our older son was my son. Another overheard and said the same thing. Our son has helped the pack the past two years, serving for a time as den chief, and though he always called me Mom, apparently that was missed and he was "just another Boy Scout". So, I guess I do ok with avoiding favoritism!

Thank you Torveaux.