Scout Confidentiality

[acco40 95]

As a Scoutmaster, am I obligated to share the contents of the SM conference with the Scouts parents?

 

I've had Scouts tell parents (according to the parents) one thing and tell me another in a meeting. For example, when discussing a position of responsibility a Star scout candidate expressed zero interest in becoming a PL, ASPL or SPL in the future. However, feedback from his parents were that I told him he couldn't hold those positions. I handled it by telling the parents what the requirements were to hold those positions. I did not share with them the contents of the discussion I had with their son. Should I have volunteered that information?

[EagleInKY 14]

I'd say "that's inconsistent with what Johnny has said to me, but I'll go back and follow up with him on it". If Johnny now changes his tune, then we talk about that. If Johnny restates what he told you before, offer to have him correct it with his parents, or you will. If you just tell the parents, I don't think there is any specific confidentially rules that you broke, but you run the risk of losing the trust of the boy.

[Rooster7 11]

You're not a priest. You have an obligation to be completely forthright with a Scouts parents unless there's good reason (i.e., abusive parents) not to be. Every Scout should expect nothing less. Parents are not the enemy and Scouts should not be given the impression that they are anything less than who they are - the adults who are ultimately responsible for their upbringing and well-being.

 

This is a pet peeve of mine: Organizations and individuals, who are given temporary trust of a child, yet chose to withhold information about that child from his/her parents. Unless they have a legitimate reason to be concerned about that childs safety, this should never be the case.

 

As to the expectation of confidentially - Why would a Scout have this expectation unless Scout leaders are overtly stating it as a troop or personal policy? We should never give a Scout the impression that we his confidant for secrets that is a duty/privilege reserved for his parents. That being said, we should share with the parents as much as we reasonably can it should only be limited by our time and energy available to do so.

 

[EagleInKY 14]

Rooster

 

I agree with you that we should give feedback to parents. I'll often give feedback like "Johnny and I had a good talk today, he's really maturing", "Bobby is making some improvement, we just need to get him to control his temper when things don't go his way", "Billy still interupts a lot, I just wanted you to know that I called him aside and asked him to be more careful"...etc.

 

However, in the specific case mentioned by the stapler guy, I would rather take it back to the scout and let him come clean. In this case, it sounds like the scout is trying to work the parents against the SM.

[scoutldr 739]

If troop elections are properly conducted, why is there even a question? The boy was either elected to a POR, or not. If he's nominated in an open forum, and declines, then everyone knows the score. The SM does not "allow" nor "disallow".

[Herms 10]

In our SM conferences we don't discuss anything that could be considered confidential. (A Scout is Trustworthy). If a parent wants to sit in (they usually don't) we ask them to sit quietly and if they have questions or comments to visit with us after. Many times we have both the SM and ASM there during the conference, so it I guess in that case you would have someone to corroborate your version. However, I think I like how EagleInKy would handle it.

[FScouter 24]

I don't think it's fair to subject the boy to a two on one Scoutmaster conference. What's the point?

[Bob White 20]

I can think of few converstaions I have had where one party or the other doesn't have some expectation of some level of confidentiality depending on the subject.

 

I can understand that when a scout has a conversation with a leader that a certain level of confidentiality is understood and expected. Much as a person would expect from an employer or other authority figure. However the moment that the scout tells an untruth about our conversation that expectation is out the window.

 

In this case I would have brought the scout over and in front of his parents say "Your parents have some questions that directly relate to the conference we had. Do you have a problem with me sharing that conversation with them?". I would ask the scout to stay and add anything you might miss.

 

Even if what the scout had said was positive, I have always asked their persmission to share it with someone else just as an example to the scout as to how he should treat others.

 

Certainly anything he shared that would seem to affect his safety of welfare or that of others I would have a responsibility to share with the appropriate people.