rpushies 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 How in the world did we get to the point that Scouters are making jokes about child abuse? Do these people not understand the pain and suffering a child must endure for the rest of their life because of that abuse? Someone please explain to me how a Scouter can go through Youth Protection Training and then make such inconsiderate and insensitive comments! Comments made on a public forum devoted to Scotuing. Making fun of child abuse is just down right sick! I am shamed for having even read the comments! Yours Truly in Scouting, Rick Pushies Link to post Share on other sites
nldscout 18 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 Take a chill pill dude Link to post Share on other sites
bt01 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 ???????? Link to post Share on other sites
rpushies 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Author Share Posted September 17, 2005 RE: MandatoryTraining again Posted: Friday, 9/16/2005: 8:16:53 PM quality -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "I have 9 YPT cards, one for every year of JLT training I've done and all except one have all the corners, after all they are like the totin' chip card- right?" and then this post RE: MandatoryTraining again Posted: Friday, 9/16/2005: 8:34:36 PM quality -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "Exactly STL, you are allowed to abuse up to 3 scouts before you have to go through training again" Then I wrote, "As a victim of child abuse, the post: "Exactly STL, you are allowed to abuse up to 3 scouts before you have to go through training again" and the previous posts about having corners taken off are VERY OFFENSIVE! HOW DARE YOU MAKE A JOKE ABOUT CHILD ABUSE! You should be ashamed for making such insensitive comments. CHILD ABUSE IS NOT FUNNY!" "Take a chill pill dude" nldscout, do you relly mean that? Am I to sit back and whatch people make fun of abusing children and remain silent? Yours Truly in Scouting, Rick Pushies Link to post Share on other sites
FScouter 24 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 Ricks thread is in response to a smiley-face comments in the Mandatory Training thread where it was suggested that corners cut off the YPT card for child abuse is similar to corners cut off the Totin Chip card and it is OK to abuse up to 3 children. The fact that Rick is upset proves that child abuse makes a life-long impact on a child. It may be easy for another to make light of child abuse and it may be easy to tell victims to just get over it. If your neighbors house burned down, would it be funny to joke about playing with matches? If a fathers young boy is run over and killed by a Mack truck, would get over it be an appropriate response? A victims pain is personal. Respect it. Link to post Share on other sites
Venividi 35 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 I agree with Fscouter. Being Courteous and Kind come to mind. I am sure that no malice was intended when the comment was made. But when pointed out by someone the insensitivity of it, it is worth considering the other person's perspective. As Fscouter says, the person deserves respect. Link to post Share on other sites
anarchist 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 I almost did not post here because it is sure to go bad (as it were) An now from the otherside of the planet... FScouter has posted well, and insightfully... But that being said, humor is often wrapped around tragedy...someone once said humor was mankinds way of keeping from going crazy... rpushies great pain is clear, but the respect FScouter asks for has to also extend to the general membership (society)...is joking now forbidden or just limited to "knock knock who's there?". People make innocent comments for grins and all of us have to understand that for each joke there is probably someone's dire experience being give the short end of the "respect" that was due... That anyone (except an abuse survivor) could not see the humor that was offered is hard to imagine. As Venividi points out however,consideration needed to be acknowledged...let me appologize for the pain you felt...I am sure harm was not meant. Every day we say things that have little real meaning ..."I'm gonna kill my son when he gets home" or "I would like to use that boy as an anchor" (overheard on my last canoe trip)and someone might take offense but ...It should be enough to know (I think) no one was trying to tread on toes (here). and yes rpushie, Nldscout did probably mean it (chill pill) but him not knowing your history, I would not hold it against Nldscout. That such a comment would bring out such a strong reaction shows your pain has never been overcome. I would hope you are still working with talented people to learn to deal with your horrible experience. You live in a society that habitually treads on toes and you need to continue to develop the tools to help you deal with that. Humor touches on all facets of the human existence and it is not going away. starvation, murder, floods and famine, and even child abuse, injury, it all finds away into humor ... into "jokes"...sometimes the laughter is a salve on wounds that can't be healed, sometimes it just helps us from going crazy...there is usually nothing meant by a joke... anarchist Link to post Share on other sites
FScouter 24 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 Those that engage in off-color humor need to expect that there will be those who will feel offended and disgusted. While such jokes may be inevitable, what is even more offensive is to blow off a person's personal objection with a comment like "get over it" or "chill out". Link to post Share on other sites
rpushies 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Author Share Posted September 17, 2005 To Everyone, Eric (meamemg) posted an apology to the post I took offense with and I accept his apology wholeheartedly. I have included my response below. Anarchist, In response to your comments: "and yes rpushie, Nldscout did probably mean it (chill pill) but him not knowing your history, I would not hold it against Nldscout." I don't hold it against Nldscout. My response was, "Take a chill pill dude" nldscout, do you really mean that? Am I to sit back and watch people make fun of abusing children and remain silent?" I did not call him names or make accusations, I just asked questions. I admit to being hypersensitive to issues relating to the abuse of children. Some days more so than others. Although I expressed my anger in my posts, it was just that an expression of anger. I did not threaten anyone or call them names. I just shouted out my anger, the anger of a little boy caged in the body of a grown man. If my anger offends, I am sorry. Yours Truly in Scouting, "little" Ricky Hi Eric, Apology accepted! Actually I went and took a look at a number of your other posts once I calmed down a little. I realized that I probably took your post in a manner that you did not intend. You appear to be much too good a Scouter to make such a comment with any malice intended. I don't apologize for my response, although it was probably a little over the top. Let me explain a few things. As a boy, Scouting was my sanctuary. When I was involved in Scouting, I was not abused, I was not told to go wait on the front porch with my packed suitcase for the people from the orphanage to come pick me up, I was not made to kneel on uncooked rice in the corner because of my bad behavior and I was not physically in fear for my life. Now this is pretty powerful stuff for a little kid to deal with. When I went to a Scout meeting in my uniform I automatically had a group of friends, I had adults that helped me, the adults always kept me safe and I had fun! Fun was pretty important stuff for me. If we moved to a new town there was always a new group of friends waiting for me at the troop meeting and a new group of adults to keep me safe. Scouting was a powerful influence on me. So, when it appears that one of my fellow Scouters is making fun of children being abused, well I go a little nuts. We, Scouters protect children! There is no joy for a child that has been abused. It does not go away, ever! You just do the best you can day by day. Yours Truly in Scouting, Rick Pushies Link to post Share on other sites
anarchist 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 rpushies, I am glad this is "working out"...I too, as a boy found a safe and nurturing place in scouting. I was blessed with a "nature" that helps me deal with my problems (for better or worse) ...and I have learned to understand that even scouters aren't perfect..."mistakes" are (or seem to be) a central element of the human condition. I hope you know that I didn't accuse you of calling nldscout names ...I was just asking you (in a somewhat lefthanded way) not to think he was a bad guy ... and "little" Rickie... about your Anger ...I was I not offended, by the time I jumped in you had gone on record with an understandable reason for your "outburst". Anger from a "victim" should always be understandable...and once recognized acknowledged and soothed (as much as possible) I do not look for any great "growth" or break-through from this thread. I only hope that we all contine to see that some times unknowingly we step on toes - but it does not mean we are bad people, sometimes we need to apologize - even for unintended harm,... and we always need to forgive. YiS anarchist Link to post Share on other sites
scoutldr 732 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 I think this thread has been valuable. Thanks, Rick for sharing. Now let us all remember this at the next troop meeting or camping trip. The little scout that is being a pain in the patoot, or the kid who shows up wearing the wrong color socks, or the kid who is gigged on "scout spirit" at his BOR because he only came to 74% of the activities (probably through no fault of his own)...just may be dealing with HUGE issues that you and I have no clue about. For some youngsters, scouting is the only "safe haven" and source of friends they have. Let's not make it overly burdensome or complicated. Link to post Share on other sites
rpushies 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Author Share Posted September 17, 2005 Hi anarchist, You wrote, "I hope you know that I didn't accuse you of calling nldscout names ...I was just asking you (in a somewhat lefthanded way) not to think he was a bad guy ..." No fears, I was just trying to let you know that although I did not like the comment from nldscout, my response was an attempt to engage the conversation further so I could understand. Thoughts of other responses bounced around in my head till I realized that would not be nice. So, no bad guy identified in any of these posts. I appreciate all the compassionate responses. Making such personal information known leaves me feeling a little vulnerable. You guys know a lot more about me now, than I will probably ever know about you. That is the way things are in life sometime! By the way, I just found out some very interesting information about why I have gained so much weight over the years. It seems the reason for my weight gain is due to the large amount of knowledge I have gained over the years. So I'm not fat, I'm just really intelligent and my head couldn't hold anymore knowledge so it started filling up the rest of me. (If only it were so!) Well rounded Scouters take heart, we're just a lot smarter than the skinny people of the world! See I still have a sense of humor, honest I do. Yours Truly in Scouting, Rick Pushies Link to post Share on other sites
anarchist 10 Posted September 17, 2005 Share Posted September 17, 2005 Hey rpushies, did you hear the one about the DE??? they gave him prune juice and cabbage for supper... and he woke-up the next morning ... a Scout Master anarchist Link to post Share on other sites
nldscout 18 Posted September 18, 2005 Share Posted September 18, 2005 To all of you trying to answer for me, I have one thing to say. BUTT OUT! I do not need you defending what I say. I meant exactly what I said, there was nothing said here that anyone should have gotten all wrapped around an axle over. So chill. Link to post Share on other sites
johndaigler 10 Posted September 18, 2005 Share Posted September 18, 2005 nld, The point is - you don't get to tell other people what wraps them around axles. It's not about over-sensitivity or defensiveness -- it's about putting your own little world on the shelf for a second and realizing that other people - for us that often means children - view the world differently, and find joy and pain in different places than you. Even after all that chat between your first and second posts, you still dish out that post?? Amazing!! I hope you're better with the boys! But I'm sure that this little post isn't enough to wrap you around an axle. . . jd Link to post Share on other sites
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