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Webelosmom

By the way....moms aren't allowed....

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We moved to a new state (Texas) and my 6th grader and I were looking for a troop to join. My son's friend was in a particular troop, so we attended a meeting. As soon as I walked in the door, I was directed to where the moms were having a meeting. I decided to ask a couple of questions about the troop. I asked about moms attending campouts.....blank looks from the moms... then, "the fathers go camping with the boys...it's a father/son bonding thing."

 

Well, I'll make a long story as short as I can, but apparently this troop was originally part of another troop, which split into two separate troops,mainly over the issue of mom involvement.

 

Now, I don't even really like to camp, but I happen to be lucky enough to have a son who still likes his mom around, and I had camped with his Webelos den. He wanted me to go at least once...I wasn't planning on going on every campout! I couldn't get a good reason out of the SM, he only said "You know....women.....teenage boys....". (???)

 

A friend of mine was looking for a troop for her 5th grader. I told her to be sure to ask this troop about moms camping. They actually brought up the topic before she did: "By the way...we don't allow moms on our campouts." When she asked why, one of the leaders said: "Well, sometimes the men and boys might be around the campfire, and they might be talking about things that the moms shouldn't hear."!!

 

Anyway, we visited another troop that hadn't even heard of moms camping. They had to ask one of their church leaders about it, and he said "Haven't been asked before, but I'd have to say definitely not." We did visit one troop that didn't seem to mind maternal involvement, but they were a little too "high adventure" for my son.

 

We didn't end up joining a troop....that was last year. This year, my son's interest was renewed, and he joined his friend's troop(the non-mom troop)! My husband doesn't travel as much as he had to last year, so he is able to go along on campouts. He's been impressed by the troops leadership and organization. I'm supposed to be going to one of their committee (read:moms) meetings, and I'll try to keep my mouth shut....I've related this whole thing to a few people down here, and basically, the consensus is "You DO have to remember that you're in the south."

 

I am wondering if BSA has any kind of policy regarding this. It almost feels like descrimination: apparently they don't allow female leaders of any kind. (I wouldn't mind helping as a merit badge counselor) They DO let the moms do the bakesales and fundraising! One mom said she's just glad they get to help with SOMETHING, apparently they weren't even included with that, in the past.

 

I have been so stuck on the principal of the whole thing, but I've put my son first, and allowed him to join this troop. They do run a very organized program, and the older boys seem to be good leaders. I hope this post generates some response. I'm interested to find out if others have encountered this, and possibly from those who advocate such views.

 

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I don't have any trouble with moms in particular but I do have trouble with parents in general. I don't see a need for a parent to go on a camping trip unless he/she is a member of the troop leadership corps.

 

Too often, especially with moms, I see them "running interference" for their son. "That's too heavy, let me carry it for you." "You go play, I'll set up your tent." "I'll cook dinner, you guys go do something."

 

I think that a camping trip with 30 boys and 15 adults is a bit silly. It isn't teaching the scouts to survive away from mom. Once upon a time, I had a mom go camping with us and get livid when I told her that she really needed to bring her own tent and let her son sleep with his buddies.

 

If I could afford to donate a school bus to my troop, I'd do it. That way we wouldn't need so many parents to drive and fewer would find excuses to go camping.

 

Take your son camping away from Scouts. Let him show you what he's learned.

 

If you want to be involved with the troop, volunteer for a committee position or go get leader training and become an ASM.

 

 

 

 

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I'm in the south (Georgia) and most troops here do allow moms to camp and be leaders. There is one troop near me that has a website saying "fathers or other male role models are encouraged to camp with the troop". I will not set foot in their door.

 

No, it is not a BSA policy.

 

I really don't know what to tell you since it sounds like you looked at every troop in the area and asked why. I think it is a bunch of hooey. Some boys don't have dads around or dad is not interested in camping. As long as the woman is following the same rules that the men have to, what is the big deal?

 

 

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Oh My! Good thing my wife is not there, she would be there with backback on at the start of the campout with BSA rules in her hand demanding where it says moms can't camp. You should push the envelope and demand to become an ASM. GO CAMPING! I will not let my wife read this post because she will be on a plane for Texas with backpack!!

 

ASM1

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The BSA does not bar females. However it does not require them to be included. It is a choice left to the Chartering Organization.

 

Bob White

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The BSA does not bar females. However it does not require them to be included. It is a choice left to the Chartering Organization.

 

Bob White

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DAMN! Bob White, wrong twice in the same day. (marking this day on the calendar) It is not left up the the charter organization. Parents are encouraged to attending scouting events under BSA guidlines. If it were left up to the CO, it couple be possible to ban single female parents from becoming SM'a or ASM's. ERROR! Not possible!

 

ASM1

 

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ASM1, check again. The CO approves the SM and ASM applications. The Mormons do not allow females to lead the BSA groups.

 

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ASM1

Don't smudge your calendar up yet. Sctmom points out a clear example on how the choice is left to the CO. If you take a look at my response to the other other answer you thought incorrect you will see that I'm 2 for 2.:)

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Well, As a CO, I beg to differ. It is clear that BSA policy be adheared to strickly. There is no BSA policy barring females from becoming SM's, or ASM's. I think everyone needs to read the chartered agreements between your CO and the BSA. They are all the same standard form.

 

ASM1

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ASM1 and Sctmom, I would have loved to show up with my backpack and stir things up! But, as my husband reminded me, joining the troop is for my son, not me. I've asked him if he cares that I can't go camping, and, being a little more independent this year, he says he doesn't mind. I also wouldn't want my son to be ostracised by the other boys due to my actions.

 

I didn't plan to coddle him, though. Like I said, what bothers me is the principle, or the lack of reasoning involved.

Sctmom your question, "what's the big deal?" is exactly what I want to know. The sad thing is that the attitude of the other moms seemed to fall into the following categories:

1. Relief at not having to participate

2. Agreement that female adults, adolescent boys, and camping

equal potential trouble (very very sad...not to mention

sickening...)

3. Can't this woman just drop the subject?

I've taken the merit badge training (while visiting another troop) so I could do that.

It seems funny,more than half of our cub pack's den leaders (including myself) are women..a lot of this pack filters into the troop I'm speaking of.

 

 

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Another point. My wife, with backpack on, is a ever present Morman disgruntled victim of female discrimination. I took her from a troop of Mormans who can not drink coffee, or alcholhol. Yet the night I took her from this Troop, her Scoutmaster was drunk. Spare me the hipocracies of the Mormans. She is still devoted Morman, but she also knows she is but a pawn to their movement. I am Methodist, you know them, where we all work together for the betterment of our existance on this Earth.

 

ASM1

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"It seems funny,more than half of our cub pack's den leaders (including myself) are women..a lot of this pack filters into the troop I'm speaking of. "

 

Reminds me of our pack being in a parade last year. The boys rode their bikes. The men drove the trucks to carry the Tigers and younger siblings. The only adults walking with the boys, helping with bike problems, keeping up with the boys, etc. were moms (some registered leaders, some not).

 

I don't know where you are originally from, but don't buy that "it is the south" bit.

 

I agree that you shouldn't rock the boat if your son is happy. It is for your son. Go volunteer for Girl Scouts! You don't have to have a girl to volunteer.

 

 

 

 

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"Well, sometimes the men and boys might be around the campfire, and they might be talking about things that the moms shouldn't hear."!!

 

Maybe I'm wrong on this one. I am the SM in our troop and I would not allow these conversations anywhere on scout functions. I know the boys will tell them in their tents but not where the adults are present. Our role as role models does not fit with this statement.

 

We do allow the women in our troop to attend our outtings. I do, however, tell them to be cautious about correcting the scouts and also that we do not allow a parent to correct their own child unless it is a matter that needs addressing immediately. The boys do not have a problem with this.

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