Liz

Neither are we. For the most part, BSA's litigation has been damages from when an adult from gender A assaulted a child from gender A. Mixed-gender or single-gender units don't have much bearing on that. In my many years in Scouting, twice I've been in units where there's been a youth-on-youth sexual assault at a Scouting event. In neither case did it involve mixed-gender units, or even "linked troops." In one case the offending youth was kicked out of the event, the unit, and the program immediately. In the other case, well, since it's ongoing I can't comment on it here, but let's just say it hasn't been handled expediently and may not get handled at all.

"If you are a little larger than when you were a college student, then consider sizing down for your daughter. " - You just made me spit out my beverage on my laptop. LOL. I wish I were only a "little" larger than I was in college. I am, however, about 4" taller than my mother. I was teeny as a child, and I remember my mom tucking me in and crying on my 12th birthday because I was not yet 5 feet tall and she'd stopped growing at age 12 so she didn't think I'd ever hit 5 feet. I grew almost 3" the following year, and approximately another inch per year until I was about 16 or 17, then slowed down and finally stopped when I got pregnant with my first kid at 19. I topped out at 5'6" before a car accident and spinal injury took part of that last inch away from me. My sister is 5'5" but was tall as a child and followed my mom's growth pattern of stopping growth at age 12. I think my mom is 5'2". But my dad is 6'3" Or was, pre- osteoporosis. Anyway, my girls aren't genetically related to me or anybody else I know, or to each other for that matter, so it's all guesswork anyway. 🤷‍♀️ I'm definitely not going to buy the 30". Just toying with the idea of whether to go straight for the 40" sash. I think I had a 30" for my oldest child, which was not real tall, and I ended up upgrading and moving all her merit badges to a longer sash very quickly. I started out with the 36" one for my 2nd kid, and he was 6'3" by the time he aged out of Scouting. I don't remember it ever looking too short on him. But I'm not real sure how often he wore it at that age. The older kids were very active in the OA and wore that sash a lot more often than their merit badge sash. It's also possible that he just stopped wearing it when it got too short. LOL.

I suppose that's possible. I always figured you start going down the back side of the sash if you fill it up, and the sash length should have more to do with the height of the Scout. My daughter is unlikely to fill up even a 30" sash and I'll be (pleasantly) surprised if she is motivated enough to reach Life rank. But I think she'll do Scouting until she ages out, and then I'll let her decide whether to apply for an extension (she is autistic and has some very significant learning delays & moderate social delays) but I think at that point she probably won't be interested. I'm more concerned with making sure I get a sash is long enough it won't look silly on her when she's 16 or 17 years old.

So the Sash now comes in 3 sizes - 30, 36, and 40 inches. I think it only used to come in 30 and 36 inch sizes. Am I remembering right? So the 40 is probably only for fluffier Scouts? Is 36 still considered the best size for most kids? My daughter is 10 and is already 5 feet tall, and pretty slender. She will be crossing over in a few months. It's hard to know whether she'll stop growing in a few years like many girls do, or whether she's going to maintain her 100th percentile for height into her teen years. But I have a hard time believing she'll ever be tall enough to need a 40" sash. Thoughts?

Once you are in the OA, you have lifetime access to it and can re-join it at any time as an adult. If you haven't yet, this is a great time to renew your OA membership and yes, rock that ancient lodge flap!

Well, maybe "less culturally charged than a script that refers to the young Scouts as 'Braves'" would have been more descriptive of what I'm looking for. It is true that pretty much everything we do has cultural origins from somewhere. That is unavoidable. But I'm not really worried about a group of white kids (all the families in our Pack currently are as pale as the snow, as the fact is we don't live in a very racially diverse community) doing something that heralds back to Vikings or the ancient Celts. I am concerned about the perception that as we stand on the soil that was previously occupied by the Kalapuya Nation until our own (well, my own) direct ancestors arrived about 170 years ago and displaced them, we specifically call out Native American traditions and pretend that what we are doing is copying what they did, when in fact we haven't done a lick of research, made up the ceremony ourselves, and wouldn't really have any cultural right to use theirs even if we did know anything about what their traditions entailed. I'm not one to see cultural appropriation behind every rock and bush, but at the same time, I think it's always appropriate to be sensitive to our neighbors.

I am definitely just looking for something short, and just didn't really want to write it myself. I found something I think will work with some minor edits. Many cultures worldwide have historically used symbolic face painting, including (but not limited to) NA, Celtic, and African tribes. So I don't see any reason why such a ceremony should be tied to any particular culture other than Scout culture. It seems much safer in terms of not stepping on the toes of people whose culture the participants don't belong to, to just make it about Scouts and not about NA cultures. I was surprised to find that most of the scripts I pulled up on the Web were comparing the Scouts to "braves" and the face painting to a NA ceremony. 😕 I want a script because with social distancing it's going to be the parent performing the face painting. I don't want to put the mom on the spot to make something up while holding some face crayons in her hand. LOL! Thanks! I think I've got something now.

Hey! Our previous Pack did face painting at every rank advancement, and our Cubmaster had a set of scripts from *somewhere* that I really liked. But now that I search for face painting scripts for Webelos I'm finding stuff that is full of half-assed and stereotypical Native American references. I wouldn't necessarily mind NA references if it was done well, but to avoid even the appearance of cultural appropriation I'd prefer a face painting ceremony script that is culturally neutral. That is what we had - no references to or copies of any specific cultural face painting that I recall. I have messaged my previous Cubmaster but I'm not sure I'll get an answer quickly enough as we had a kiddo earn Webelos at the very last minute and we have a Pack meeting on Monday! He had a set of these scripts that he made copies of, and they had diagrams of the different face paint designs for the different ranks... he got them from somewhere. Help?

Come to think of it: babysitting could be considered a “career.” My son has babysitting duties as part of what pays his room and board at my house. If he wanted to volunteer (he doesn’t) that shouldn’t be a barrier to doing so.

I never said not to share opinions. Just that this wasn’t what I was looking for. I’m not inclined to dictate what people can and cannot post in reply. Opinions are at least interesting. The policy, as you state, is clear and doesn’t give exceptions, even logical ones. But the FAQ definitely makes a few exceptions, and in the example of a sleepover, it says “if” the friend is a Scout then the policy should be followed. Fortunately we have 3 adults in our household and 2 of us are registered Scouters. But I have no issue abiding by the example in the FAQ. We recently had a Scout come over for a sleep-over, but because her mom (also a Scouter) is single if my daughter were going over to their house I would stay over too in order to comply. I’m fine with that. The challenge I’m having is where in between the “this is the exception” and “this is the rule” should the line be drawn. Clearly the BSA intends us to make exceptions. I’m interested in whether they’ve documented anything to tell us where the line is, as they’ve only given us two examples of exceptions.

The policy states no one on one contact with registered youth inside or outside of Scouting. The FAQ makes exceptions for if it’s necessary to your career or if it’s your own child; but those are not part of the written policy and in fact by the letter of the policy they are contradictory. FAQs are not intended to answer all questions about policies, just the frequent ones. So the lack of clarification on adult family members other than legal guardians doesn’t mean much, if anything.

I was exposed to porn by an older sibling’s boyfriend. That guy was a creep but was not a Scouter. I’m very aware that abusers are usually close friends and family members. But that doesn’t change the fact that close friends and family members sometimes have to be trusted to be alone with kids. I guess that written line in the sand is as imaginary as I was afraid it might be?

Really? So what are they? Where is this clear line drawn? Can you point me to the right paragraph because I can’t find it. That is why I’m asking.

I’m not convinced it does, but I’m looking for a written guideline for where that line should be drawn. The change is subtle, but it’s now called out that unless you MUST be one on one for your career (for example when I worked in special ed I had to spend a lot of one on one time with youth) as a registered adult leader you’re supposed to avoid one on one time with children even outside of Scouting. It seems obvious to me that this can’t apply to parent/child situations. but what about adult siblings? Does it matter whether they are in the same household? Cousins? Nieces and nephews? Grandparents? 3rd cousins twice removed? A neighbor that is “like family”? Where is the official written line between “don’t put yourself in a one on one situation with a child” and “nah, don’t worry about it, it’s family.” ?

So here’s an interesting question. How far does the new rules about YPT for leaders not being one on one with registered Youth outside of Scouting extend into families? If my adult son or daughter were to decide to become a Scouter, or register to do a merit badge, would that mean they could no longer babysit my kids (their sisters) who are in Cub Scouts? Hypothetically, what if my kids’ cousin or aunt or other extended family member wanted to volunteer with a Scouting unit? Suddenly overnights at Aunt Patty’s are a thing of the past? For that matter, is it OK per the current rules for me to be at work today and my husband who is COR in a local unit to be alone with the kids during their virtual schooling? I’m not particularly fishing for opinions (of course I’m not saying you can’t share your thoughts) but what I’m searching for is written documentation of how far we are supposed to take these rules in activities or relationships that don’t have direct correspondence with Scouting. Obviously there has to be a line somewhere; it’s absurd to expect Scout leaders to not be alone in a room with their own offspring who are Scouts. But where IS that line, officially?