What has happened to courtesy?

[Stosh 3452]

GWD is correct, kids can't learn courtesy if their parents have no idea what it is. If that be the case, teach it yourself.

 

As I said, I refer to my kids as Mr. ----- and they answer back with Mr. B____. I salute them and they return the courtesy. I treat them courteously and get it back.

 

Lead by example. It's no big deal to set the norm for the troop.

 

Stosh

[packsaddle 753]

From what I see around here, children in general are just as courteous as they were when I was growing up. Maybe it's a regional thing.

[Pack212Scouter 10]

I see your point all the time. And more often than not, it is the fault of the parents. They are just too busy to bother enforcing courteous behavior...or they don't care themselves. Our pack seems to run about 5% boys going out of their way to help. 90% being courteous in general. And about 5% that are defiant about it.

 

What always pleases me though is to see the outstanding examples. For instance, at our recent Webelo Winter Camp, two Webelo 1's (ok...our CC's and CM's) went off and cleaned the two restrooms on their own shortly after our arrival. They weren't asked to do it, simply took it upon themselves as something that needed to be done.

 

My own son (a Wolf) weekly makes sure that our meeting rooms (16 of them) are clean and straightened up at the end of the meeting night while I help wrap up other things. He was never asked him to do this. Both he and a few others that I notice go out of their way to hold doors for people.

 

Whenever I get discouraged, I think of the boys that DO exhibit courteous behavior and remember that it's getting across to at least some of them. Even one success makes it all worth it.

[JeffD 10]

i agree its with parents - and here are my examples.

 

estes rockets:

scouts - wow we had a great time launching these last year

parent: "i dont understand why we bought such "CHEAP LOOKING" rockets"

 

B&G

scouts: yeah!! cake

parent: i dont eat pasta - we need to tell the caterer to put in some chicken dishes (her complaints even caused the caterer to quit and pretty much ruined that relationship)

 

even responding to emails.... this same parent complained to the group that people need to check their email on a regular basis. all this after sending out a nasty email to the group that i didnt take the time to respond to her requests after a couple of days. the reason i didnt respond - i was in the hospital having surgery those couple days.

 

i will say it was a breath of fresh air when some scouts from a local troop attended our meeting. i went to pass out flyers to the groups and they told me that this is a job for a scout to do. so there is hope.

 

 

[Novice_Cubmaster 10]

The biggest discourtesy in our unit is that 50% of the parents don't know what "RSVP" means.

 

The second is the long, noisy interval between "signs up" and the room getting quiet. But its a FAR second place to the RSVP issue.

 

NC

[Gunny2862 11]

In fairness, I don't think many of our Scout parents speak French.

 

But I do sometimes wish they would let me know in advance if they or their Scouts were coming along or not on any given activity.

[OldGreyEagle 5]

What French? As Miss Shirley Feeney pointed out, RSVP means Respond So Very Promptly and I don't need to know French to know beaucop means big as in "this cost beaucoup bucks"

[TigerLisa 10]

I had a similar experience at our Pack overnighter last August...to the point that I was seriously questioning my decision to put my boys in this Pack. It was our first summer with the Pack, and I was still getting to know the parents and kids. We had a marshmallow roast with goodies for S'mores, and I was in charge of breaking up the chocolate bars and handing out the graham crackers and chocolate to the kids. Well, it was total mayhem, with Scouts shoving, yelling, grabbing, dropping wrappers on the ground, and demanding things from me -- as in, "Gimme chocolate!" and "I want more graham crackers!" With very few exceptions, their manners were horrendous or non-existent. Even more frustrating than this was the fact that the parents (who were ALL present at the event) just sat back and allowed this behavior to continue without stepping in to PARENT their kids. Let's not even get into the Scouts waving flaming marshmallows on metal sticks around in close proximity to other Scouts -- it is a miracle nobody lost an eye or had their clothing or hair ignited. I vowed then and there never to attend another Pack overnighter with this group. How sad is that?

 

The complete lack of courtesy and manners can be blamed squarely on the parents. I would not in a million years allow my child to speak to an adult -- no less a Scout leader -- in that way. As a Scout leader, I can only do so much in the limited amount of time I spend with these boys...especially boys in dens other than my own.