Do you think that if your son does something wrong

[troop_358_potlatch 10]

at a troop meeting that you were not aware of even though you were there, that you should be told right away? This happened to me,my son made a mistake at a meeting, but I was not informed at the time. I was told about it days later at a parents meeting in front of all the parents that were there. I felt that the ASM should have told me when my son did it, rather than in front of the other adults.

[Bob58 10]

Frankly, I hope that your son was corrected appropriately and the ASM was only advising you of the situation. Sooner would have been much better. Confidentially BEST. AS you seem to realize there is a right way and a wrong way to make sure everyone is on the same page once someone decides to correct a mistake. If it was a health or safety issue it could have been presented in a way that would have made your son proud to have already been straightened out (enlightened?) Instead,an unthinking leader rattles your cage and could have embarrassed one of our young members. I hope that all is now well.

 

I attended an adult trainimg program which made a great deal of its professionalism and collegial attitude, right down to "Pomp and Circu,stamce" at the closing. Yet when they missed recognizing three attendees the person at the microphone ad libbed, "We'll make sure that anyone who was not registered on time will still receive their certificates. We have to check your paperwork so get it in on time!"

 

The speaker was dead wrong. All three had been early registrations. One of them has told me that he will not attend another training if the same group is involved in preparing the program. Sometimes we just make it hard on everyone!

 

Bob

[eisely 13]

I am less concerned about the lag in telling you about the incident than the manner in which the information was conveyed to you. I don't think SMs and ASMs are necessarily obligated to run up to a parent every time a kid makes a mistake. IMHO that could create an unfortunate impression on the scouts and the parents. However, if anybody is going to inform a parent when a kid makes a mistake, it should be handled confidentially. The committee shouldn't even get involved in such matters unless the adult leadership is proposing something drastic such as suspension or removal from membership.

[Scoutmaster Ron 12]

I suppose that if my son was loud or not listening I wouldnt need to know about it and that the appropriate person in the troop had informed my son that his behavior was not appropriate that would be ok. However if it was more serious than something like that than YES and at the parents meeting I would have said "Thank You for bringing this matter to my attention and that I was not aware of this allthough I was at the meeting and in the future I would appreicate it if it was brought to my attention right away and not presented to me in a forum such as it is being now.

This way your letting people aware that you share their concern and that you want to be told of something like this right away.

You may want to get Bob White's take on this matter sometimes he has a different spin on how to deal with matters such as this

[Bob White 20]

Well since you asked....

I can see where there ia an apprporiate time for each action, and a good leader will know when to escalte to the next level. I would always try to solve behavioral problems with the scout first. There are a lot of ways to do that, Scoutmaster Conferences, counseling, training, encoraging and rewarding proper behaviour.

 

If that didn't work I would involve the parent and mor often than not I would talk to the parent and the boy together.

 

Only if that did not work and the behavior was such that it caused a danger to the boy or to others would I go to the step required by the BSA youth protection program for safety matters and have a confernce between the parents and the troop committee.

 

Nowhere in this process do I as the scout leader punish the scout. That is not my responsibility or training, and I do not volunteer my time to punish other peoples children, (you would have to pay me and pay me well to do that). Punishment is the parent's task not mine.

 

Thanks for listening,

Bob White