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Humourous Merit Badges


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The badge requirements we don't want our sons working on:

 

Applying nail polish and makeup

Having your "colors" done so you can look stunning

Making fancy outfits for your action figures

Fashion shows

Color coordinating your tent and sleeping bag

 

 

A Few we do want them to learn:

 

What a belt is for -- no one really wants to see your underwear

Soap and water CAN be your friend

Why you should pack underwear for summer camp

Things you should not say in front of you MOM (no matter how funny it is, Mom MAY not be as impressed)

Sleeping (at night!)

Yes you can clean up after yourself at all times!

Showing off your body noises at Grandma's family dinner is NOT a good idea, save it for the campout

You will survive the weekend without your video games

Do not roll your eyes when you are being lectured especially by a female

How to use the washing machine for cleaning your uniform (I love the line of "your mama ain't in Boy Scouts)

 

Some things the boys learn on their own:

Ropes and tape can provide hours of entertainment

Eating out of the pot you cooked in saves dishwashing

Anything can be used as a projectile in a catapult

The ability to burp the alphabet (I hear about my son's friends who have mastered this, what pride their parents must have)

Anything can be a toy

Any situation can quickly be turned into a game, possibly the type that drives adults crazy

How to look innocent when saying "but you didn't say NOT to do THAT"

How to look interested and concerned when your mother or teacher has "a talk" with you

Ways to avoid soap

How to turn ordinary objects into weapons

 

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How About a Grocery Shopping merit Badge, requirements would be to locate and explain why sweetened condensed milk is neither with the regular milk, or the baking goods. The scouts could explain the ettiquette of not blocking the aisle when seeing a neighbor/relative for more than 20 seconds. They could explain why coconut comes in both cans and bags and what each one is good for, They could explain just what the heck Marzipan is

and the difference between real vanilla extract and imatation extract and when either is best used. Why is Bown sugar both dark and light and they would have to know that confectionary sugar is not a brand name, but what some people call powdered sugar.

 

My foray to the local market for baking goods was somewhat vexing this year. Anyway, Merry Chrismas to you all, whether you want to or not, suit yourself, you always do....

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