Chadamus

@Col. Flagg

 

Okay, I just gotta ask: Do you really think @The Latin Scot's members have their own troop emblazoned, custom made, hand crafted Scout socks?

Nah, just a typo. I'd bet my necker on it.

Clothes lint! It's free, light, and readily available. (Especially to families with kids!)

To give credit where it is due, a Life Scout in my son's Troop brought a ziplock bag full of the stuff to a campout. I thought it was a great idea so I now save a pinch after each load of laundry.

Great thoughts, everyone! Thank you! Keep 'em coming!

It bothered me, as well, when my son dropped out of scouts when he as at Star rank.  It surprised him that I did not.  My focus was on helping all boys, not just my son.

My son has seen and heard about my passion for Scouting for years now. I doubt he'd be surprised if I continued on. I feel like once I agreed to take the SM position, I was in it for all the boys, not just mine.

I had an interesting interaction a couple times.... when as Treasurer I have felt compelled to attend a meeting because I know I have business...but he was either sick or just didn't want to go...This happened mostly when he just didn't want to go, he strongly objected to my going as well.  I'm not sure, but I think he didn't want attention called to the fact that he was ditching.  I can't say I was joyed about going without him but I did.

 

We have some that are at every meeting and on every trip with their sons.....kinda like 3rd year WEBELOS, or really better than that but they are often interacting....

and others that are always there but do a fairly good job of minimal interactions, letting other scouters deal with their sons....

The first time I went to a meeting without my son (sick) was surprisingly satisfying. I understood the appeal of sticking around and being part of the unit even after one's son ages out of the Troop. There are (hopefully) many years before I'm in that position, but I can see myself being that kind of leader.

I should also mention that from the very beginning, I have asked his permission (as well as that of my wife) before accepting any position in his Unit. It was important to me for him to understand that this is his journey, and that I would only ever be around as much as he wants me to be.

Torchwood, I respect that. I had not considered doing so, partly because I was "voluntold" I would replace the current SM when it was time, and also because I feel like I can do right by the boys. I'm looking forward to the opportunity. As I mentioned earlier I will be talking to my son and will be interested to hear what his answer would be if it were up to him whether or not I was SM.

Thanks for that perspective!

Only and ASM here. In my troop, we pawn our kids onto other adults. I know my oldest is glad about that b/c I tend to be harder and expect more out of him than others. Now when he is home, I will remind him of things he needs to do occasionally, i.e "Do you think ( insert names of missing patrol members) need to know what is going on since they missed the meeting?". And he will ask me for advice

I'm trying to remind my son less and less as he grows, but I've definitely done my share. We also pawn ours off. It took my son a bit to understand why I will not sign off anything in his book.

The only time my sons complained (as well as my wife and daughter) was when I talked too much about scouting at the dinner table. To give the whole family a break, scouting discussions at home were very limited.

It's a fine line for sure. I find myself biting my tongue at times for fear of push-back. I haven't received any yet! 

Thanks, Barry.

I have seen some parents/sons who are together all the time while at scout activities. I had to recently ask my sons if they feel like I'm around too much or if I give them enough space to do their own things. They both said they feel comfortable with how much space I give them. So that was a comfort. 

One of my big concerns is that I will almost always be there. Once of the appealing things about Boy Scouts for me was that my son could do Scout things without mom and dad around like in Cubs. 

The other thing, respect the fact that your son will probably the one coming early and staying late to meetings on your account.

Good advice, qwazse. I do see the extra time investment from the current SM and son. To his credit, I've never heard one complaint about it from the son.

My dad was Scoutmaster of my unit. He was harder on me to make sure I was prepared than he was on the other scouts. The reason, I thought, was because he didn't want to be embarrassed by me being unprepared. The real reason that he was trying to raise the level of scoutcraft within the troop and wanted a few scouts able to demonstrate these skills and lead.

 

I felt like he was always looking over my shoulder. He wasn't. When I really looked he was taking the time to circulate, talk to the PLs and just let the guys know he was around.

 

He didn't hound me about advancement. Many times he reminded me to take extra time to enjoy things instead of rush through. He didn't play favorites, and would have to remind himself not to be harsher on my than he was on anyone else. There was no way Scouts thought I got away with anything. Quite the opposite.

 

He gave me my space when I asked, but was always there when needed. Many times it was me who suggested we not see each other during summer camp and he honored that request. I'd seen him having lunch with other kids, but he was always available for a coke or an ice cream before camp fire.

 

It wasn't until my Eagle COH I realized exacty why he'd spent so much time doing all these things. It wasn't for the troop, the other kids or even himself. It was all for me...just to be "around" and watch me grow and learn, even if at distance. He some how found time to document seven years of my scouting career from afar. I never knew he was even at some of those events, yet I finally knew by the fact he had thousands of pictures of me and my friends.

 

If you can manage to be a Scoutmaster and still be around for your son, you'll have done your job. Talk to him. See what he wants. Listen to his wishes. Don't parent while at scouts, save that for home.

Back Pack great feedback, thank you. My son has asked me on more than one occasion if I've noticed how the current SM and his son don't act like father and son. Me response was "What are you not seeing to make you say that?" and "Why do you think that is?" He initially thought it was the SM that wanted it that way, then said maybe that's how the son prefers it. I'm glad he's already thinking about the dynamics of the relationship. The conversation he and I eventually will have should be a good one.

To the current and former Scoutmasters who have simultaneously had a son in the Troop,

to any non-Scoutmaster who has observations about the relationship between Scoutson and Scoutmaster:

What challenges have you experienced or seen? How did you overcome them?

What are the pros and cons of such a relationship?

What I'm most interested in is how different can the Scouting experience be for a boy whose dad is the Scoutmaster?

I ask this as an ASM who will be in this situation eventually.

I have some thoughts/concerns of my own i'll gladly share, but for the time being I would rather listen.

Thank you in advance!

The OP didn't ask our personal opinion of what makes a good Eagle, he asked for help on official nights of camping.

 

Barry

+1 for the reminder Barry, but as you well know these threads frequently take their own paths. Reminds me of MattR's post questioning whether or not we're really helping anyone. Which, as far as I can tell, was answered most appropriately by MattR himself on page 1.

15+ nights per year is normal (expected??) for many Troops. Some Scouts don't make all events so let's say we half that and round down to 7. Even then after three years you'd be at 20.

having less than 20 nights of camping in a tent or under the stars after being in the program for almost 7 years is unacceptable.

Agreed.

The Catholic school curriculum is significantly different than the one offered by public schools in my neck of the wooks. Cursive penmanship to give one minor example. A religious education is a major example. Your mileage may vary obviously.

According to post #3, the MB counselor and SM are one and the same.

As a parent faced with a $10,000+ tuition decision in a few months, I can say cost can be a major reason for some.

Similar experience here, Stosh. Back when I first registered I received no response. I later learned the only responses given are when an application is denied. Regardless, I took the initiative to follow-up on my application so I could be prepared when a Scout showed interest.

But NJ we must talk about the fact that they're talking! ;p

Several adult leaders in my son's Troop have continued to volunteer long after their son's time as a Scout has ended. This leaves me in the wonderful position of being able to sponge up years worth of experience, stories, advice etc. Is this culture normal?

I'm not trying to be the moral authority for anyone TAHAWK. Because one can discriminate, doesn't mean one should. Just sayin'.

So religious discrimination?

GSMOM73 & bsaggcmom thank you for the clarification. I did not know Girl Scout units do not have Chartered Organizations.

Fehler, these 'alternate facts' are why I asked previously: what is being opposed?

Edited for spelling.

☺ I know which side of the argument you're on. But that's for a different thread.