imachristian13
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@@JoeBob - I'm actually well past the hurt in this. I will ask you what I asked @@HICO_Eagle. What would you do differently in the "approach"? -
@@HICO_Eagle - While I do thank you for your comment and sharing your message on your scenarios with your Autistic Scouts, I do want to comment on an aspect of your commentary that is far off the mark. Tell me how you would have done this differently. Our Son was invited to visit the Troop by his own friend who was involved and whose father is a family friend as well as an ASM and a Commissioner. After the initial visit and before committing to joining, we sat down (my wife and I) with the Committee, SM and most of the ASM team (including the two ASMs we've been discussing all al
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Your point is well taken with one critical exception. Saying that "this is more than I can handle" would have been fantastic! Even though they had agreed to take on our son, they always had the out - it was written in the Committee minutes that way at MY insistence so that everyone was clear. All they had to do was say "can't do it anymore...now what?" Instead, they took all of the negative steps that have been discussed all along. We are moving ahead. They have chosen to continue to be inappropriate in their actions BUT that's OK...we are all about moving ahead.
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It actually only became grounds for the 2 ASMs to raise a negative tone toward our family - not expulsion from the District. SM is worn out - can't serve the other boys if he has no ASMs anymore. That's what would happen if he spoke up we believe.
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What little we know? What don't you know? The expectations of his autonomy were actually too low.
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To reiterate - we did not demand this obligation - we asked for their commitment and they agreed that they were willing to make the effort. And, as an aside, enough with the quotes on our training them, OK? When you are fully trained in how to do something, describing it as such is fully proper.
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Hi - thanks for commenting. I won't tell you that you don't understand. I will tell you that you didn't pay attention to something I've been saying all along. The beginning of our relationship with this troop was a sit-down meeting between the SM, the ASMs (including the 2 involved in our concern), and the majority of the entire Committee. At this meeting, we - in essence - asked permission for our son to join the troop. We explained what they would be dealing with from his point of view as well as our intended level of involvement. Had they not agreed to take on our son, we would not be i
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While I do recognize that you are playing Devil's Advocate, I think you are missing one important thing. Our son had BOTH parents onsite for every meeting. We had been as interactive in the meetings as we were permitted to be by the other ASMs and SM - always stepping in when our son went outside of the parameters that the boy leaders could handle (or the ASMs for that matter). The only time that there has been any concern is on local service outings or local campouts - both of which were approved by the SM and ASMs for us to step out so he could have a bit more normal of an experience.
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What makes kids who don't play video games and/or who obey their parents earn the label of "Stepford Children"? Is it that much of a stretch that this happens?
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Quite the contrary. The now-former troop members were very strong in how they interacted with our son. When that wasn't working, the SM and ASMs (even those two) encouraged the SPL, PL, etc. to seek us out as well as other opportunities to learn about how to make everything work. The issues we had came, primarily, when the scenario grew past the abilities of the available members; thus, requiring adult involvement. I have to ask something to all of you here. The basis for how to interact with our son when he is in crisis is not complex. As an adult, unless you are having a bad day yourse
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Well, Dr. Qwazse, here's my thoughts... Our son has been in on the discussion from before we switched from Royal Rangers to BSA. We were "wrong" because we trusted the adult leaders to communicate properly with us. We were wrong because we believed that the adult leaders would keep their own commitment to assisting us in making our son's experience positive. We were wrong, lastly, for not recognizing that - despite our being right there in front of them at (almost) all times - these folks were displeased with how things were happening. There are no issues with the boys of the troop -
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@@DuctTape - I certainly understand the Devil's Advocate angle. The problem is that I am usually the one playing that role in our community. Before posting these threads in the first place, I have already played all of the visible sides out in order to present a fair (and as unbiased as possible) view. The response from the district and from the SM - coupled with the reactions we have received from other SMs when we request a visit (usually "Oh...you are coming from THAT troop?") - I think I'm on solid ground. We are moving on either way.
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Hey folks! Your sense of humor and solid advice - each and every one of you - really helped me get through these past few days. I really appreciate the willingness to help.
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Humor me on something? Would you go through it and point me to the 11 points you see? I'm so jaded to it, I'd love to see what you see. If it's not a lot of stress. Thanks.
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A couple of thoughts. First, I'm not sure if there is anything else lying underneath. Second, the reason I don't know is because these folks didn't tell us any of this until last night. Third, we didn't come in the door and say "we are here, we will train you." We were invited in by another scout and his family. We sat down with leadership to determine that they were interested in trying this out. We told them that our goal was to share all we knew to help them succeed for all of the boys' sake. Like you, I despise those who expect "special treatment" for our type of kids. We are onl