gungho4scouts Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 With some reservation I'll be attending the parent's (of the den) meeting tonight. As some of you may recall, I "threw" my hands up in a tirade for the mesh of silent communications. But now I can see that it's due to the general cloud of confusion that hangs over the Tiger Program. I'm learning quite a bit while a newbie in the Scouts. Most from the direct results of the guidance on this forum. Not wanting to screw this up for my Boy. I wanted to see if there were some devil's advocates out there that can help me prepare. 1. Apologize for my tirade to those I may have offended. 2. Suggest that we look at the Tiger Cub program in one of two ways. a. Share Leadership 1. Define Share Leadership as; each parent's assigned month would be their's to do what they want. They decide the meeting place, time, frequency and activities. a. As a Den decide what is minimum times the Den should meet for attendance purposes, besides the Pack Meeting. b. A single TDL will act as the resource manager and liaison for the rest of the Den, Pack and District. i 1. All the parents agree to be TDL's during their month. Registering and uniform is optional. 2. The TDL will act as helper to the parent only when asked. 3. No prior submission requirements unless the parent solicits for it. b. Sole Leaders 1. One person would make all the decisions. 3. Collect a pool of ideas for some of the local Go-See-It's. If there is 5 months left as Tigers, then have 10 (or more) Go-See-It's to pool from. 4. We as parents agree on how to handle situations in the face of unbecoming behavior by the Boys. 5. Ask for a consensus to the idea of having the "Gathering" in the gym or outside (depending on the weather) for some energy draining games. a. Allow the parents to mingle for the 15 to 20 minutes. 1. Pack leadership can share information with the parents. 2. Parents can ask questions b. Lets the boys exert energy. c. Give the Boys the sense of being in a Pack. d. Allows the Pack meeting to focus on the activities on center stage because the Boys had a chance to play. There is always more, but 2 through 5 seem to the big ones that plague the Pack. Please shoot any holes into this as you see fit! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperParatus Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 I really can't follow all the numbers and letters, but I clearly like number 1 (apologize). Humility will go a long way in making this a workable situation for you and others. With that attitude, I would hope things will go much more smoothly and all will eventually fall into place. Do emphasize the shared leadership approach so everyone can be involved and no one is overburdened. Good luck to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fotoscout Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 I think you are still having trouble understanding the concept and practice of shared leadership. There is only one Tiger Den Leader, and maybe one (or more) Asst. Tiger Den Leader(s). They are uniformed, trained, and registered adult leaders in BSA. Sometimes they are not trained and sometimes they are not uniformed, but they are still the registered leaders in the Den. Then there are Tiger Adults, these are the parent partners of the Tiger Cubs. Got it? The Den Leader is in charge. The DL (or designee) coordinates the activities of the Den. This is one person, not a shared responsibility. If a parent has accepted to take on an achievement (or elective), the DL will facilitate that activity by making the scheduling announcements as needed. The DL may make den funds available to the parent for the activity. DEPENDING ON THE ARRANGEMENT, the parent may provide the gathering activity along with the achievement activity (or elective) OR just the achievement activity (or elective). The DL is always responsible for the opening and closing. The DL starts the meeting, and ends it. The DL communicates information to the boys and Parents. The DL will turn over the meeting to the parent doing the activity. The parent is not a defacto Den Leader for the meeting. The DL is always in the middle of things, directing the boys attention to the parent when needed. The DL is the one putting the Cub Scout stamp on the meeting. The DL is the one who talks about the Promise, and Law of the Pack. The DL is the one who sings the songs, or does the skits. The DL is the one who talks about good deeds and does silly things with the boys. From the boys perspective the DL is the focal point all the time, except for the time you have turned the meeting over to a parent for an activity. When the activity is over, its the DL who concludes the meeting. Even then, sometimes a parent may wish to step in and do some of this. When I did Tigers it worked like this: Gathering activity DL Opening - DL Announcements , Business DL Activity Parent Closing DL And when the parent had trouble or was running too long, it was the DL who stepped in. When the parent had a flop or forgot, it was the DL who stepped in to wing it. This is a dynamic process; its alive, it flows, and it changes all the time. It is not engineered to the nth degree. You need to develop an understanding of flexibility, and an ability to be flexible n real time. Sometimes the rules just dont fit, sometimes the structure breaks down, and the best laid plans of mice and men oft times go astray. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twocubdad Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 You're re-inventing the wheel. The outline you need to be following is already out there. But you're not far off: 1) The method of shared leadership you are describing is what the Tiger program looked like up until about three years ago. Now, there needs to be one TRAINED, registered, uniform Tiger Den Leader who supervises the program. He or she is responsible for coordinating the portions of the program led by the parents. The parents still have a responsibility to help provide the program. The suggested method is to let them handle it on a monthly basis, as you describe. But the TDL is still there to make reminders and to have a back up plan in case the parent/leader falls through. As you suggest, it is a good idea to sit down with all the parents and come up with an annual calendar. That, too, has already been done, if you choose to use it. Pick up a copy of "Program Helps" from the Scout Shop. It has a year's worth of programs already laid out for you. You can follow that program, or you can pick and choose the ideas from Program Helps that interest you. The most important thing is to make sure the den covers all the den requirements and Go See It's the boys need for their Tiger badge. That's not to say you only have to cover five requirements/outings, but after the five requirements are complete you have much more flexibility to do whatever interests the den. Foto did a good job of covering the basic elements of a good den meeting. Program Helps also gives you an agenda for every meeting along the lines of what Foto describes. Personally, I like my humble pie with a dolop of whipped cream and a glass of milk, but however you can get it down is fine. Bon appitite! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FScouter Posted December 9, 2004 Share Posted December 9, 2004 What foto and twocub said. There's only one Den Leader. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperParatus Posted December 10, 2004 Share Posted December 10, 2004 Soooo...how did it go? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gungho4scouts Posted December 10, 2004 Author Share Posted December 10, 2004 First, took each person aside and personally apologized, and again as a group during the meeting. Everyone was receptive, except for the outgoing TDL who made it very apparent that she didn't want to have anything to do with me or my apology. The "assistant" DL is now the new TDL. It was our e-mails that started this whole ball of wax. The new TDL came prepared with the same outline as I had presented here for review. I've read Foto's, and with this group of parents the dynamic's is more attune to doing it as it was outlined by EagleDad. Each parent runs the meetings on their month, the TDL gives help when and where needed. I've meet with another Pack whose TDL is more in keeping with Foto's description and it works well for them. The overall reaction by the parents at this meeting, I would say EagleDad's version has a greater appeal. The overall meeting went great, got what I think will be a great TDL. [HS Teacher] The only hiccup in the meeting was by the outgoing TDL who announced that she will be leaving the Pack at the end of this month. After getting home, the new TDL called and personally apologized for the outgoing TDL's remarks towards me during the meeting. She wanted to be sure that I didn't think it was a beat up session. Told her that I really didn't come away thinking that. Instead felt that the Den is in capable hands. The positive effect is a commitment by all the Parents to actively attend the PL meetings, and in helping with the decisions that will make the Pack grow and go! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SemperParatus Posted December 10, 2004 Share Posted December 10, 2004 And they all lived happily ever after... (except of course for the mean 'ol TDL) With that turmoil behind you, I hope you can settle down to a long and fulfilling career in scouting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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