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Has anyone seen a good new campfire skit?

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  • Has anyone seen a good new campfire skit?

    The campfire skits at our district events have been recycled so many times that there are few surprises for even the newest boys. Has anyone seen a good new campfire skit that they would like to share?

  • #2
    Well this is an old one by my standards, but I haven't seen it in years. I was reminded of it today teaching Basic Life Support classes. It's the CPR skit.

    Two scouts are walking along when they run into someone lying on the ground. They go through the motions of doing CPR in a very exaggerated way, and count extremely loudly with the counter screaming "BREATH" and giving funny faces while doing it. This goes on and the compressor says, man I am getting tired, don't know how much longer I can take it, and the breather says, "ok, ok SWITCH!" and the victim become the breather, the breather is now doign compressions, and the compressor lays down and becomdes the victim.


    • #3
      Here's one we came up with:
      The World's Worst Job
      A Scout is lying on a cot when his alarm clock goes off. He reluctantly gets up, shuffles over to the mirror, sighs a lot, acts like he is getting dressed, and goes to the office (a table with a phone on it) and sits at a chair next to the table. He pauses and the phone rings.
      He answers it saying "Hello? Yes. (pause for about 1/2 second) Yes. (pause)Yes. (pause)Yes. (pause)Yes. (pause) (this goes on for about 10 - 15 seconds, then he starts getting upset) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) (louder and more upset)YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) (REALLY LOUD NOW)YES. (pause) YES. (pause) (starts hitting the phone) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) (slamming the phone now) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES. (pause) YES YES YES YES Why can't you ask something else? YES YES YES YES STOP IT STOP IT YES YES YES YES (Kicks his chair) YES YES YES YES (screaming it now) YES YES YES YES YES (one final scream and runs off stage. Another Scout wearing horned rimmed glasses and a dark trench coat comes on and holding a cell phone to his ear asks "Can You Hear Me Now"?

      (dress it up how ever you want. It takes practice, but it goes over really well)(This message has been edited by OldGrayOwl)


      • #4
        Thanks Eagle92 and OldGrayOwl! Come on everyone else, there must be lots more ideas out there!!


        • #5

          Many skits are re-hashed, though since some of our Scouts are Boy Scouts for 7 1/2 years. Many refreshed skits are timeless.

          I usually like the talking dog, but I've seen the punchline frequently change to keep it timely as "Maybe I should have said Joe Dimaggio" to "Pete Rose" to "Mark McGuire" and now "Derek Jeter".

          I don't know how old or recent this skit is, but I've only seen it recently. There is also a similar version on You Tube. But I was rolling at the version that was done at NYLT.

          Dead in a Ditch.

          Every time the Scouts say "Dead in a Ditch". He is normally writing it down on a notepad (or his palm) so this Scout will say it loud, slow and very pronounced.

          The Summary is a four Scouts in two imaginary cars have a car wreck in front of the campfire.
          Three Scouts fall to one side, one Scout falls to the other side.

          Two more Scouts come driving in as though they were state troopers, a rookie and a senior cop (making siren noises and swirling their flashlights). As they are writing up the police report; and the dialogue continues the senior cop says to log it as "Dead in a Ditch". The rookie cop that can't spell writes "dead in a ditch" for three of the Scouts. Often asking the smarter cop how to spell "ditch".

          Finally the senior cop (Scout) tells the junior rookie to record this final Scout as dead in the Boulevard. The rookie cop writes and says "DEAD IN A...." The young rookie ask, how to you spell Boulevard. The senior cop, starts, "Bea... Boa... Bu..." Then they both grab the final dead Scout and drag him to the other stack of three Scouts, and the senior cop says, "Dead in a Ditch" as the junior rookie writes it down.

          Scouting Forever and Venture On!
          Crew21 Adv


          • #6
            Remember Jackie Gleason and "Big John"?

            A scout walks into a pretend bar/saloon( or in this case..a soda shoppe) . He looks at the bartender/counter person and says :"Everybody hide, Big John is coming!"

            "Everybody else sayd "OH NO! NOT BIG JOHN!" The bartender, who is new to town doesn't knoiw who Big John is, asks " Who is big John?"

            The scout who ran in sayds:" He the biggest , toughest meanest peson you ever saw!"

            Everybody starts to leave, except the bartender/counter person who is doing last minute cleanup.
            JUst as te bartender starts to walk out, a big guy rides up on a brahma bull and dragging a mountain lion on a leash. He gets off the bull, punches it and knocks it out cold. He then picks up the mountain lion, slaps it silly and says "SIT!" to it.Then walk into the saloon.

            The bartender is scared silly. The man says ( in a deep loud voice):"Give me a shot of whiskey!"

            The bartender pours him a shot and hands it to him. The guy slams it down and then say:" Gotta go, Big John is coming!"

            so you may have to change the scenary and setting. Use the smallest scouts to start with, and maybe your biggest adult for the guy on the bull.


            • #7
              Who is the Scoutmaster?
              this is something we came up with, it does take more than minimum preparation, but is a real knee-slapper

              The skit begins with a uniformed Scout/Scouter standing on stage when another person enters the stage, preferably wearing a hat with the word PRESS written on an index card and placed in the hat band.

              Reporter: Are you the representative of Troop XXX in XXX?
              Scout: Yes sir. Are you the reporter I am supposed to meet?
              Reporter: Yes I am. My paper thinks a story on your troop would be interesting, its supposed to be very unique.
              Scout: Yes, after all, we are the finest troop in XXX Council!
              Reporter: Well, I am glad you are proud of your troop, now tell me about the leaders.
              Scout: Lets see now, WHO is the Scoutmaster, WHAT is the Senior Patrol Leader and I DONT KNOW, the Quartermaster.
              Reporter: Well thats just great. I dont think you are the right person for this.
              Scout: And Why not?
              Reporter: Do you know the leaders names or not?
              Scout: Yes I do.
              Reporter: OK, then who is the Scoutmaster?
              Scout: Yes.
              Reporter: I mean the guys name.
              Scout: WHO.
              Reporter: Who is your Scoutmaster?
              Scout: Right.
              Reporter: Wait, Repeat what you just said.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: Youre asking me?
              Scout: I am not asking you, I am telling you , WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: But I am asking, Who is the Scoutmaster?
              Scout: Thats the mans name.
              Reporter: Thats whose name?
              Scout: Yes.
              Reporter: Well, out with it, tell me
              Scout: WHO.
              Reporter: The Scoutmaster.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I can see I am getting nowhere with this.
              Scout: I am answering your questions honestly.
              Reporter: Hey, I was a scout once. Made it to star when a boy is ready to advance a rank, he has a Scoutmaster Conference right?
              Scout: Yes.
              Reporter: So, Who does the conference?
              Scout: Exactly!
              Reporter: Wait you are confusing me, what is the Scoutmasters name?
              Scout: Actually no, WHAT is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: But I am not asking you who is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: Thats what I am trying to find out.
              Scout: Well dont change the subject.
              Reporter: Me???
              Scout: Now take it easy.
              Reporter: The Scoutmasters name is what?
              Scout: WHAT is the name of the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: I am not asking who is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Scout: WHO s the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I DONT KNOW!
              Scout: Oh, thats the Quartermaster, but we are not talking about him.
              Reporter: How did the subject change to the Quartermaster?
              Scout: You mentioned his name.
              Reporter: I mentioned his name? Who the Quartermaster?
              Scout: No, WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: Stay away from the Scoutmaster, OK?
              Scout: You started it
              Reporter: What is the Scoutmasters name?
              Scout: WHAT is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: I am not asking you who is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I DONT KNOW!
              Scout: He is the Quartermaster.
              Reporter: There we go, back to the Quartermaster.
              Scout: Well, I cant help it.
              Reporter: Say, Lets stick with the Quartermaster.
              Scout: Sure.
              Reporter: So, What is the Quartermasters name?
              Scout: What is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: I am not asking you who is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I DONT KNOW!
              Scout: The Quartermaster.
              Reporter: Does your troop have a Scribe?
              Scout: Sure, every good troop has a Scribe.
              Reporter: The Scribes name?
              Scout: WHY.
              Reporter: Oh, I thought I would just ask.
              Scout: Well then, I thought I would just tell you.
              Reporter: OK, Who is the Scribe?
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: What is the name of the Scribe?
              Scout: WHAT is the name of the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: I am not asking you who is the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Scout: WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I DONT KNOW!
              BOTH: The Quartermaster
              Reporter: And the Librarians name?
              Scout: LATER.
              Reporter: Oh, just forget the Librarian. Do you have a Troop Committee Chairman in this troop?
              Scout: Of course, we wouldnt be the finest troop in XXX Council without the finest Committee ChairPERSON.
              Reporter: OK, tell me the Troop Committee ChairPERSONs name.
              Scout: TOMORROW.
              Reporter: You dont want to tell me now?
              Scout: I am telling you the name, TOMORROW.
              Reporter: Not today?
              Scout: TOMORROW.
              Reporter: When tomorrow?
              Scout: When?
              Reporter: When Tomorrow are you gonna tell me who is the Troop Committee Chairman?
              Scout: Now listen, WHO is not the Troop Committee Chairperson, WHO is the .
              Reporter: Please dont say WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Scout: You are asking the questions.
              Reporter: I want to know what is the name of the Troop Committee Chairperson?
              Scout: WHAT is the name of the Senior Patrol Leader.
              Reporter: I DONT KNOW!
              Both: The Quartermaster.
              Reporter: You know, I have a son that would like to join Boy Scouts.
              Scout: You do?
              Reporter: Yeah, I think the only way to find out these peoples names is to have him join the troop.
              Scout: I am sure he would be a fine addition.
              Reporter: Well, I think I will bring him to your nest meeting.
              Scout: That would be great!
              Reporter: And while I am there I want to talk to the Scoutmaster.
              Scout: I would think so.
              Reporter: And I take my son and talk to Who?
              Scout: Now thats the first right thing you have said.
              Reporter: HUH??? I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT!!!
              Scout: Well you should talk to WHO.
              Reporter: Oh, I talk to WHO?
              Scout: After all, WHO is the Scoutmaster.
              Reporter: I talk to WHO
              Scout: Yes.
              Reporter: So after I talk to WHO, the Scoutmaster, I then talk to the Senior Patrol Leader and his name is WHAT?
              Scout: Yes sir.
              Reporter: And then I talk to the Quartermaster .
              Scout: I DONT KNOW.
              Reporter: OK, WHO is the Scoutmaster, WHAT is the Senior Patrol Leader and I DONT KNOW is Quartermaster.
              Scout: By George, I think youve got it. Youre the one who said we were unique I thought you knew about the names.
              Reporter: But doesnt that cause a lot of STRESS?
              Scout: STRESS, thats the guy keeping track of rank advancement.
              Reporter: Lets see, WHO, WHAT, I DONT KNOW, WHY, TOMORROW, STRESS, they are all names? Holy Smoke!
              Scout: Thats our Troop Chaplain.
              Reporter: Stick a fork in me, Im done!
              Scout: STICK, hes one of our Troop Guides.
              Reporter: Im leaving. This is NUTS.
              Scout: NUTS, Thats our Unit Commissioner.


              • #8
                OGE, great retooling on the old Abbott and Costello bit!! Thanks!


                • #9
                  Thanks for that one. True story in the 189os in New Orleans, a horse that died on Tchopitoulas Street (pronounced Chop a tool us), the police officer couldn't spell Tchopitoulus, so he, the owner, and several bystanders drageged the caucus to the next street that he could spell.


                  • #10
                    The Cast: a Promoter, an "Ugly Man" under a big box or blanket, a "Fall Guy" (either prearranged so no one is hurt, or someone deserving of embarrassment. It is good to know FG hasn't seen this skit before), some off stage voices, and two or three Stooges.

                    Promoter comes in leading the UM, under his blanket or box.
                    P speaks: "Ladies and gentlemen, I am PROUD to present for your edification and enjoyment, the UGLIEST MAN IN THE WORLD!!! He is SO ugly (voices off stage ::HOW UGLY IS HE??), that the army uses him to test the courage of their soldiers! He is SOOOO ugly (HOW UGLY IS HE??), that his momma used to tie a pork chop to his neck so the dog would play with him! Yes, he is SOOOO ugly (H U I H??), the National Institutes of Health once considered using him as the National Ugly Standard!! etc. ((lay it on thick))
                    "Now, ladies and gentlemen, I challenge anyone in this audience to gaze upon his visage, if you dare! You sir! Will you dare to look at him?"
                    First Stooge: "I'm the bravest man here!" ((he strides proudly up, peeks under the blanket, and runs screaming from the stage, into the woods)).
                    P: "All right, who's next?"
                    S#2: "Aww, it's a bunch of hooey, It can't be that bad, I don't think anyone could be THAT ugly, it's a trick, it's a... "((he peeks under the blanket and faints dead away, falls on the floor)).
                    P: ((proceed as above, as many times as seems necessary. Then, the Fall Guy is brought up)) You, Mr. Scoutmaster! You're the bravest man we know! Won't you look at this poor creature and prove everyone wrong? Come on, it's important for our Scouts to have faith in their leaders...!! (etc.).
                    ((Mr. Fall Guy eventually comes up. If FG#1 refuses, choose another.)) (( When FG peeks under the blanket, the UM jumps up and runs screaming from the stage...)).


                    • #11
                      WEll, not sure if any of you saw this one, but it went overreal well at our last pack campout.

                      A den will come to front center and one cub gets on his hands and knees. He is a lawn mower.
                      Then the Den Leader comes up and says : " Okay boys, this yard is a mess, we really need to cut the grass!"

                      So one of the boys walks up to the cun on his knees and pretends to pull on the starter cord. The cub on his knees make a weak motor sound and stops.
                      Each cub in turn does this.

                      Then the Cubmaster walks up and says :"What's going on?"
                      Then one cub says : "WE were going to cut grass, but can't get the mower started."

                      The cubmaster says : " Let me try." and pretends to pull the starter cord. When he does the "mower" scout starys Running really loud and takes off , and one of the scouts says :" Oh, all that was needed was a big jerk!"


                      • #12
                        One Scout a customer is sitting at a table in a restaurant. Another Scout is the waiter who comes to take his order.

                        The customer orders a hamburger. When the waiter brings it, the customers finds a hair in it. The waiter apologizes and brings another. This is repeated three times.

                        Finally the customer demands to see the cook. The waiter goes to get the cook who comes out looking baffled. The customer tells him there have been hairs in every hamburger he has been served, and demands to know how the cook makes his hamburgers.

                        The Scout playing the cook pretends he has a ball of meat in his hand by tossing it up and down a few times, then put it in his arm pit and closes his arm to his side, then catches the flattened hamburger when he opens his arm.

                        Laughs and groans to follow!


                        • #13
                          The best skit I have seen in recent years was actually a staff skit, but it could be pulled off elsewhere. It went like this:

                          2 Scouts, one a lifeguard (LG), and the other the waterfront director (WFD)

                          LG (looking at watch, then shouting out acoss the lake): OK, 5 o'clock! All boats: it's time to come in!

                          a few moments pass
                          LG: Row boat #9, we're waiting on you!

                          a few more moments pass, LG begins to really act impatient
                          LG: Hey guyes, we want to go eat! Come on in!

                          WFD walks up
                          WFD: Hey Joe, what's the hold up?

                          LG: It's row boat #9; they won't come in.

                          WFD: Row boat #9? We only have 7 row boats.

                          LG (first puzzled then frantic): We only have 7 row boats?....Row Boat #6!!! Do you require assistance?!?


                          • #14
                            Needed Material

                            Boys Life
                            A can of SPAM wrapped in newspaper
                            Big Cardboard Cut-Out of an Hourglass (3ft tall)
                            Blue Towel

                            Announcer: We have just created a new product for Boy Scouts, we call it 'The Scoutmaster 1.0'. A fully animatronic scoutmaster with a built-in computer system that can do everything a normal scoutmaster can do, but Better!
                            (walks off)
                            (scouts 1-3 come in carrying Scoutmaster 1.0
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 pretends to be 'turned off' by having his head down and slumping forward)
                            Scout 1: It's here it's here! our new Scoutmaster!
                            Scout 2: Power it up!
                            (scout 1 pretends to push a button on Its chest)
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 stands up straight and looks at the scouts)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Hello Scouts (everything he says is robotic sounding and monotone)
                            Scouts 1-3: Yes!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: You've Got Mail!
                            Scouts 1-3: Cool!
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 hands scout 1 the Boys Life, scout 2 the letter, and scout 3 the can of SPAM in the newspaper)
                            Scout 1: I got my Boys Life! Cool!
                            (walks off)
                            Scout 2: I got a letter from my mom!
                            (walks off)
                            (scout 3 rips off the newspaper)
                            Scout 3: (disappointedly) I got Spam!!!
                            (he shows the audience the can and walks off with his head down)
                            (Scouts 4-6 run up)
                            Scouts 4-6: Scoutmaster! Scoutmaster!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: What's wrong scouts?
                            Scout 4: There's a man coming to our campsite!
                            Scout 5: Yeah, a weird man! What do we do?
                            Scout 6: Look here he comes! (he points)
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 moves the scouts behind him)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Don't worry scouts, I'll handle this
                            (wierd man starts to walk in)
                            Weird Man: Hi there! I was wondering if i could borrow some firewood
                            (Scoumaster 1.0 charges toward him and pretends to punch weird man in the face, weird man falls down and stays there the rest of the skit)
                            Scouts 4-6: WOW!!
                            (scoutmaster 1.0 walks back towards the scouts)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: You're safe now scouts! Now go have fun!
                            (scouts 4-6 run off)
                            (scout 7 runs in holding his arm)
                            Scout 7: Scoutmaster! Scoutmaster! Help me I cut my arm!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Is it Bleeding?
                            Scout 7: Yes it is, now help me!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Let me think...
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 picks up the Hourglass and turning it over and over for 15 or so seconds)
                            (scoutmaster 1.0 puts the Hourglass down)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Is it bleeding badly?
                            Scout 7: Yes! Yes, it's bleeding very badly now help me!
                            (scout 7 is now on the ground in pain)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Let me think...
                            (scoutmaster 1.0 picks up the Hourglass again and repeats what he did before)
                            (scoutmaster 1.0 puts the Hourglass down)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: You need first aid! Now! Uploading First Aid Program.
                            (scouts 1-3 run back in)
                            Scouts 1-3: Help us!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: What's wrong scouts?
                            Scout 1: Help! Jimmy fell out of the tree!
                            Scout 2: Drew's boat sank and he can't swim!
                            Scout 3: What do we do?
                            (scouts 1-3 continue to ask him 'Help us' and 'What do we do' over and over)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: OVERLOAD! OVERLOAD! OVERLOAD! SCOUTMASTER SHUTTING DOWN......
                            (Scoutmaster 1.0 goes back to the 'turned off' position)
                            Scouts 1-3: OH NO! What do we do!
                            Scout 2: I know! Let's re-boot him!
                            Scouts 1 and 3: Yeah!
                            (they sit the scoutmaster down, take off his boots and put them back on)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Hello Scouts!
                            Scouts 1-3: Yes! It worked!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Illegal shut down detected! Scanning for viruses...
                            Scouts 1-3: No!
                            Scout 1: What do we do now!
                            Scout 2: We need his Help!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: ONE PERCENT
                            Scout 3: Come on now! This is taking forever!
                            Scout 2: Hey don't you know a thing about computers?
                            Scout 1: Yeah, but I don't know what to do here!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: TWO PERCENT
                            Scout 2: How do we make him stop that so he can help us!
                            Scout 1: I don't know! Didn't you read the manual?
                            Scout 2: No I thought you did!
                            Scoumaster 1.0: THREE PERCENT
                            Scout 3: This isn't working!
                            Scout 1: Oh I remember! You push the F4 Key!
                            Scouts 2-3: Yeah!
                            (they all push scoutmaster 1.0's nose at the same time)
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: Hello scouts!
                            Scouts 1-3: Yes!
                            Scoutmaster 1.0: How cacacacaca can I I I I hehehe help yo yo (he says it like he is malfunctioning)
                            (scoutmaster 1.0 picks up the blue towel and puts it over himself covering his face)
                            Scouts 1-3: OH NO!!! IT'S THE BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!!!
                            (scouts 1-3 run out of the area)
                            THE END!


                            • #15
                              this is one the boys came up with after the first time we did "Who is the Scoutmaster", one word of caution, this skit needs constant revision. You can tell when this one was written and would not near be as funny or well received if done today as it was when it was first performed. Take a look at is, change it, come up with your own scenarios.

                              A hint to the older scouters, that which is on CAPITALS are the name of singers or musical groups. If your troop likes country, go that direction, punk goes another or whatever you have. The first time the troop did this skit, the youth (under 25) were rolling in the aisles, the old guys were like "huh? What? WHy is that funny?
                              For many its the first time the skit was written for them, not recycled through 10 or 15 times or more.

                              So, without further ado, I present,

                              Whats the Name of this CD?

                              Scout 1: Hey Walter (or other name), how are you doing?

                              Scout 2: Fine, You know I really like Summer Camp, but I miss being in touch with music

                              Scout 1: Yeah, I know what you mean, but the guys in my troop try to find things related to music all around us

                              Scout 2: How do you do that?

                              Scout 1: Well, its like at the trading post, whatever the total I always give them 5 cents more than the total so I can get a NICKELBACK,

                              Scout 2: Whoa NELLY, thats pretty good, you like always buying a candy bar that costs 2 quarters ?

                              Scout 1: Yeah, thats 50 Cent, Hey you kids in the front row, quit talking and behave like scouts

                              Scout 2: Yeah, do we have to call for an USHER to throw you out?

                              Scout 1: Can you believe the menu? BLACK EYED PEAS three days in a row

                              Scout 2: Yeah, thats not right, thats stupid, its outrageous, its LUDICRIS! Did you see those dumplings they made? They looked more like a LIMP BIZKIT than
                              anything else

                              Scout 1: And if your in a hurry Whats that?

                              Scout 2: Oh easy, RUSH,

                              Scout 1: I heard a kid in your troop is really homesick, he woke up last night screaming

                              Scout 2: Yeah, he doesnt think anybody likes him and feels like an OUTKAST

                              Scout 1: You know what we call the glow of the fire after the flames die down?

                              Scout 2: EVANESCENCE?

                              Scout 1: When the sun rises they say day breaks

                              Scout 2: And when the sun sets, THE DARKNESS falls

                              Scout 1: Sure are a lot of bugs around here, do you have any repellent?

                              Scout 2: Sure I do, its 12 percent deet, they call it D-12, repells anything

                              Scout 1: I would love to pull a prank on your father, the scoutmaster

                              Scout 2: Give it up, no way you can TRICK DADDY

                              Scout 1: Did you hear the Houston Rockets starters (or other basketball teams) all went sailing together after the season? They got in some bad weather though and went through a series ofstorms, they ended up on an unchartered desert island

                              Scout 2: Ok, that explains the Head line, Typhoons MAROON 5

                              Scout 1: I really like the Camp Director this year, he is a really nice guy

                              Scout 2: Yeah, I know what you mean, You could say he is a PRINCE among men I hear the flies a JET in the Air National Guard

                              Scout 1: Hey, I just got a letter from home, my mom judges show dogs as a hobby

                              Scout 2: She does? Thats neat, what breed of Dog ?

                              Scout 1: Yeah, her specialty is the Spaniel breed, you know like Cocker Spaniel, Springer Spaniel, Irish water Spaniel, those kinds of dogs There was quite an stir at the National Spaniel Show last month my mom says

                              Scout 2: What happened?

                              Scout 1: Well, the headline in Spaniels Monthly says it all, BRITTANY SPEARS Number one rank I am not sure about the E-Con Director though Did you hear next year he is are combining the Space Exploration merit badge
                              with Environmental Science next year year

                              Scout 2: Dont tell me, for three days you have to observe an ALIEN ANT FARM

                              Scout 1: Well, watching ants, even alien ones wouldnt be as bad as watching bees, those things hurt when they STING, By the way, what happened to your shirt? Its
                              awful dirty, did you get in a mud fight?

                              Scout 2: Oh,no it got STAIND in a PUDDLE OF MUD while I as running through LINKIN PARK it was feeding time at the zoo and I wanted to see the GORRILLAZ eat

                              Scout 1: I am not sure about the Camp EMT either

                              Scout 2: Hows That

                              Scout 1: I got a bug in my eye and it hurt, he said I should just flush it out with my own tears

                              Scout 2: You mean he wanted you to cry?

                              Scout 1: No, not cry, but open and close my eyes real fast

                              Scout 2: Oh I see, he wanted you to BLINK 182 times a minutes

                              Scout 1: I guess the Staff/Leader Soccer game got a little out of hand last night

                              Scout 2: Yeah, I hear 3 staff members were issued a YELLOWCARD

                              Scout 1: What do you call your neighbor next to the guy three houses from you,

                              Scout 2: Thats, easy, he is THREE DOORS DOWN

                              Scout 3: Hey what are you guys talking about?

                              Scout 2: Ryan here is telling me how to keep music in mind by using musical group names in general conversation

                              Scout 3: Oh no, not U-2 !!!
                              (turns to the audience)

                              Heres one we all can do,

                              If a guy who works with silver is called a silver smith, and a guy who works with gold is a goldsmith then a guy who works with arrows is an:



                              (they get ready to leave the stage)

                              Scout 1: Hey, did you think this skit was funny?

                              Scout 2: I am not sure, I just think the camp director is happy we didnt mention BARE NAKED LADIES

                              (Walk off )

                              be sure to have the boys write this about 2 weeks before presenting, otherwise things could get lost