mac3mpc

It's a tough decision that you have to make, my friend. On one hand you want to do what's best for not only the troop, but ultimately your own son, and on the other hand you want to do what's best for your family at home.

If your wife is truly against the idea, I would have to say that I would probably decline the position. Your still going to be there for your son as an ASM, guiding him and watching him grow through the program without the extra time commitment and stress factor.

Sorry for the double post.

You didn't mention how old your son was. Will he be with the troop for a while? Will this be a long term commitment for you?

Or is he an older boy who might be a couple of years from aging out?

That might be something for you to take into consideration.

I know we've had SM step in for 1 or 2 years until their sons have aged out and then step down. Then another ASM would step in to take over.

My husband is currently an ASM, but we know he is the "heir apparent" for the SM position when the current SM's son ages out in a couple of years. Someone else may end up doing stepping in, but right now it looks like he will be it. Our son is only 12, so we'll be around for a while.

Bottom line, you need to do what's best for you and your family. If it's going to cause too much stress on your home life, you should decline the position. You need to think about your family first and then the boys.

Good luck with making this tough decision.

I learned early on when my oldest on was just a tiger cub (he's now 19 and aged out), that I either needed to get involved or lose my husband and son to scouting. Mind you this realization came when I had just given birth to our second son, my husband brought the two of us home from the hospital, deposited us on the doorstep and immediately took son #1 off to a popcorn show and sell.

Since that time, I've helped with den activities, been advancement chair for the pack for years (even for 2 years when I didn't have a son in the pack because I knew I had another one coming in), been on the pack committee, the troop committee and I'm now the troop committee chairperson.

Mind you we also have two daughters. So while all this was going on, I was also involved with the girl scouts so that they would have the opportunity for a great program. (My troops were and are outdoor/ camping type troops, not artsy-craftsy, cut and paste.) I have been the cookie mom and the leader for both my oldest daughter, who received both her Silver and Gold award, and now my youngest daughter, 10. We've done volunteer work, traveled, camped, and experienced all sorts of things that they would have never had the opportunity to do outside of scouting.

Her troop happens to meet on the same night as the boy scout troop.(Coincidence? I think not.) My co-leader's son is also in the boy scout troop, so we've started calling the girls the little sister troop. They've come down and been taught things by the boys such as how to make monkey bread and on a family camp out, how to make a fire safely and properly, what poison ivy looks like in the spring, etc. Sure, I could have taught them, but it breaks things up to have someone different show them once in a while and the girls do admire the boys and what they do. My daughter can't wait to be 14 for the Venture Crew. 4 years......

What I'm trying to say is by getting the girls and the wives involved you can have a true family experience in scouting. It doesn't have to be us and them. They don't have to be scout widows. Yes, there is a huge time commitment, but in the end time spent with the family while the kids are young is so very worth it. I look back on the time I spent with my two older kids when they were in scouts as some of the best moments in time. I was never a girl scout myself, but I don't regret getting involved as an adult. Not for a moment.

Sorry for being so long winded.