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How do you get through to parents?


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Mom,

 

In this case, I think it would be okay to shoot the messenger - when they got back. The SM or AM shouldn't have sent a broad group message to everybody that some were sick. He should have sent messages to the parents of those who were sick. Really sick, not kinda sorta sick.

 

During our week of summer camp, not a day went by that at least one scout had a stomach ache ( too much candy from trading post) ( or eating way too much Texas Pete on a dare during lunch) or a cut , or a scarpe or a busted lip ( horseplay ) ( my son actually) , or some reason or another.

 

I think think that whoever sent the message did more haerm than good in the way they sent it.

 

I couldn't imagine it being any worse than sending a text saying: " A scout died in accident at camp - we'll contact you later." All that message does is create a ton of anguish and worry.

 

Now, we have a ban on phones during camp. We do not care if the boy call/ text each other while on teh way to or home from camp. They can call their girlfriends or other scouts who are not on this trip.

 

But once we get to camp, phones arer off and left in the trailer.

 

Exception: Ipods and mp3's. Some scouts will listen to music during down times or that short time after going to the tent but before going to sleep. Some use them as alarm clocks. Some use them as cameras. Our AC has one of the driod/ iphone/whatever all in ones that calls, texts goes online and is also his every day camera.

 

As for communication the SM, the AC and myself all had our phones with us 24/7 and charged up( plug in at ad min building) .

 

It just depended where we were at camp as the signal is hit and miss.

 

But hey, all parents also had the camp rangers buisness number and the phone number of the ad min building in case of emergency.

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No need to wonder! If there was a true emergency,(injury or illness where transporting would pose a problem) a "runner" (the ONLY time running was allowed in camp) would be sent to the nearest program area, each of which was equipped with a CB radio.

 

@FrankScout, I realize that there must have been policies and procedures in place; what I am wondering is what did the boys and their parents do? I would imagine the former simply made do without their texting, music, and games, while the latter trusted their sons would be OK unless they heard otherwise. I can understand momof2cubs point -- there should have been better communication from the leadership (something as simple as "parents whose boys are sick enough to be taken to the hospital will be contacted individually; if you don't receive an individual message then your son is fine") -- but I don't think that is a reason to allow cell phones or other electronics on an outing.

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I couldn't imagine it being any worse than sending a text saying: " A scout died in accident at camp - we'll contact you later." All that message does is create a ton of anguish and worry.

 

I don't have to imagine. I can tell you that all the cell phones in the troop (including one with the FD dispatcher on speed dial) could not outrun the state trooper showing up at that parent's door. Simply put, the names of the dead or injured are not broadcasted until the families of the afflicted are notified. The SM couldn't hazard a guess until I (the trailing car) showed up, then we went over the roster, and he took the siblings of any who would have been in that car to the hospital. He was not permitted to call us with any info until the police were certain that next of kin were at the coroner confirming the identification of the scout. Even moms of injured boys were not told of the fatality until they were in the ER with their boy.

 

All of the texts and calls in the interim (except to the CC) were useless rumors which I did not repeat to the next caller. The boys who had cell phones did not want them on.

 

Point is, moms, when it's your kid, folks will do their best to make sure you're the first to know. When it's not, the most you can expect is general info. We do that for belly aches so that we have that discipline down for dehydration, broken bones, and worse.

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Timely subject -- I got back an hour ago from a week at BS camp with our troop. We have a no-cell-phone policy with the boys, and they do just fine with it. I agree that if you allow a homesick child to call home, they will be going home. Also, scouts don't get to use my cell phone to call their parents to bring them non-essential stuff that they forgot. I bring extra bug spray, suntan lotion, pillows, flashlights, etc., as well as cards, some other games, comic books, etc., so if they forgot their favorite pillow, that's a bummer! We'll let a (non-homesick) scout call his mom or dad if they accomplished something really amazing, however, like mile swim.

 

We had one truly sick scout with a 101 degree fever, and I called Mom & Dad right away to have them pick him up. Parents have to trust the leaders. If they don't, why would they allow their kids in the troop????

 

Also, I don't want to be getting calls from parents during the week unless it's very important, or something a like a scheduling change for when little Johnny is getting picked up for his dentist appointment. We had one parent repeatedly call early in the week to make sure little Johnny wasn't eating too many slushies, was getting enough sleep, etc. Every one of those calls ate up about 20 minutes of my time while I was trying to take care of important camp or scout matters.

 

Most parents "get it", but one or two each year don't get it. Generally the ones that don't get it are the ones that have never had to supervise more than their child. The ones who "get it" are the ones who trust us, allow their son to be independent, but do thoughtful things like bringing ice cream to the campsite during siesta on a 95 degree day.

 

A friendly but firm e-mail to parents BEFORE camp, laying it on the line why we do things like we do, and why there are certain camp rules, goes a long way toward getting the parents on board before camp

 

We had a GREAT time again this year.

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Going back to the OP (about getting thru to parents, not just about cell phones)...

 

The easiest thing to do is hold the scouts accountable for themselves.

 

Kid shows up with banned item (soda, candy, cell phone, chainsaw, etc...) - it gets confiscated and locked up at the CO's location (if able to prior to departure) or gets locked up in the SM's vehicle for the duration of campout.

 

I make the scout come to me WITH a parent to retrieve the item(s). That way I know both scout and parent receive the SAME feedback on WHY the item is prohibited and why it was confiscated for the campout.

 

If it is a recuring problem with the same scout, then they can get themselves dis-invited from troop campouts. 99% of the time, its a "I'm so very sorry, I didn't realize x,y,z wasn't allowed, it won't happen again." and it doesn't.

 

The one time I had pushback from mom and dad - it was the kid's last campout and last scouting event. He was quitting anyways. He is not missed.

 

You can debate the merits of soda, candy, cell phones all you want. Each unit has their own restrictions and reasons for them. Find a unit you either agree with, try to change the rules, or find a new unit.

 

But, if you are a member of the unit, then you agree to follow the rules of the unit - period. To do otherwise is unscoutlike in my book.

 

Put the responsibility on the SCOUT. That is what we are trying to teach the YOUTH anyways. First time mom or dad embarrases the scout because of what THEY packed for him will be the LAST time junior lets mommy pack his stuff for camp - period.

 

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You can debate the merits of soda, candy, cell phones all you want. Each unit has their own restrictions and reasons for them. Find a unit you either agree with, try to change the rules, or find a new unit.

 

But, if you are a member of the unit, then you agree to follow the rules of the unit - period. To do otherwise is unscoutlike in my book.

 

That's fine advice for the parents, but the OP is wondering about what the unit can do. And regardless of expectations, the more rules there are, at least past a reasonable minimum, the more conflict there will be. Every rule the troop imposes has the chance of creating friction, so think about rules as a form of currency. You only have so big a "rule" budget before you have to start "borrowing" from the parents in the form of friction, conflict and goodwill*. That doesn't mean don't have any rules - you need some - but it does mean choose them wisely. Don't get lulled into the false belief that rules are free since it's so easy to write them down in the by laws.

 

Save your budget for the important stuff. A Scout is Thrifty too.

 

* I'll insert my boilerplate commentary on A Scout Is Obedient: If you expect someone as honorable as a genuine Scout living the Scout Law to be obedient to your rules, you owe it to that remarkable young man to only create the most respectable rules.

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Mainly, it's one mom.

 

She's the worst of them all. Other parents totally get it . Matter of fact, those parents say it's okay to whatck the scout on the back of the head if necessary! :)

 

I'm almost to the point of taking a hand stapler and stapling the broken rule to her forehead everytime she does.

 

And again, it's not like she's purposely trying to be malicious about it...she just truely thinks that she and her son's situation dosn't quite apply .

 

 

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Oh, I get it. Super mom wannabe.

 

Best solution (easiest for me because it's my favorite activity): more back-country hiking.

 

Second best: shakedown ala Seabase style. All personal gear must fit into a 12" br 24" mesh duffel. Sleeping bag presented empty and rolled before packing. Backpacks presented empty. Trailor provisioned and loaded. Packs provisioned at arrival site. Drivers may only drop off boys and no gear.

 

I prefer the former because nature does a lot of the work for me!

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Nothing beats a good shakedown and packing the vehicles the day before you leve...

 

It won't stop the kid from bringing a phone in their daypack, but it does cut down on the illicit case of soda...

 

It's also good for the parents to see what the other kids *aren't* bringing, and some ideas on what type of gear the older kids have collected.

 

With first years, we did a preliminary on Thursday where the bags were checked out by more senior Scouts. That gave the boy/parent time to get the missing items before the real shakeout and packing.(This message has been edited by Eolesen)

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>>If the camp has rules against drugs, weapons and such, I'd publicize those and expect them to be obeyed. But I wouldn't search Scouts or their possessions without something akin to probable cause.

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JMH- I agree with you 100%. My point was more on placing the responsibility with the scout.

 

My son recently bridged from webII to a troop. One of the campout rules for the troop is no Pop-Tarts for breakfast. Ok fine. I don't really agree with the rule, but I told my son he is not to pack pop-tarts. If he doesn't like the "rule" he should get to 1st class rank, get on the PLC and make a motion to change the rule. Until then, he is a "follower". he might find out there is a good reason for the rule.

 

There is, above and beyond the nutritional value... the youth leaders in the troop want the scouts to COOK meals on campouts to meet the spirit of "prepare" in the requirements for ranks. Openning a package and consuming is not really "preparing" is what the SPL told some of the boys last month. I would tend to agree.

 

As for the one parent that thinks the "rules" don't apply to her and her offspring - don't have any good advice there except for someone to step up and have a candid conversation with her about how her son is outside the bell-curve on a recuring basis with regards to showing up to outings with "banned" items. The OP states she is not malicious, but is rather oblivious... well then make her less oblivious. Sometimes all that is needed to correct the issue is to have someone point it out to a well meaning, but clueless parent.

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Perhaps emphasizing to parents the very real dangers of sugary snacks attracting megafauna into their child's tent (and the tents of other children) is the best way to discourage parents packing snacks for their kids.

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>

 

 

 

I recall a camping trip at Glacier National Park. One person cleaned all the trout we caught and he SMELLED like a dead trout!

 

 

We decided that was good, because none of the rest of us were likely to have to worry about bears that night. The guy did a major clean up before lights out that night ---on his own initiative.

 

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How difficult is it to make a 30 second phone call? "Hi Mrs XYZ, this is Mr ABC over at Camp BSA. Everything is fine, we just wanted to let you know Johnnie got a stomach bug, nothing serious, he's drinking fluids and we are taking very good care of him, and doc says he'll be back on his feet in a day. Kaythanksbye!

 

Multiply that by 300 boys on the two outgoing phone lines at camp, consider that not every call will take 30 seconds, and you have a series of courtesy calls that takes up several hours. Your unit isn't the only one in camp.

 

Bottom line, if you don't trust your leaders, your son should not be going to camp.

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We had 38 people at camp, so that means the SM would have spent at least 38 minutes on the phone. With there only being a few places at camp that get cell service for most providers, the SM would have to go away from the boys to one of these locations to use his phone--sure there were enough adults to monitor the scouts, but that does mean the SM is going to miss out on an hour of time making phone calls for no real good reason.

 

You assume that the SM can use the camp phone to make these calls, but since that phone is for emergencies only, the SM can't tie up the line making call after call.

 

Short 1/2 minute call assumes he can get thru on the first phone number given, not having to call the 2nd phone number or 3rd to actually get someone. That's assuming no adult asks more questions or really now wants to talk to the scout with the upset stomach.

 

Expecting the scoutmaster to call every parent for small issues is expecting too much. If someone goes to ER, parents are notified. If someone goes to nurse and needs to stay there or go home, parents are notified. if they require treatment of broken bones or stitches, sure. Of course the scoutmaster called the parent of the scout with heart problems, when he was at the nurse with a stomach bug because he was having heart palpitations from the dehydration. They stayed on the phone for hours with the nurse on that one.

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