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Why is parenting so hard?


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HI All

 

Is there anything harder than being a parent? Kyle, my 18 year old son is on the Canadian lakes in Northern Tier this week with his church group. All the boys in the group are Eagle scouts from other troops, so they are experienced in the outdoors. But Kyle is the only one with previous Northern Tier experience.

 

However, by the looks of the Minnesota radar weather maps this week, his crew is getting clobbered almost everyday with heavy thunderstorms. Its not like Kyle has never seen thunderstorms in the wilderness, our troop went three years strait with rain on every camp out. We thought of putting a sign on the trailer that said If its not raining, we arent camping. He has experienced many Oklahoma thunderstorms, especially that one that dumped seven inchs of rain in three hours alone with lightning so bad, the night looked like day. Kyle has experience in this kind of weather, so why are all my thoughts with him in Canada and not on my work here in Oklahoma? Why am I praying so much?

 

Is this the future of a parent? I thought when our children grew up and leave for college, the hard part of parenting was over. Am I wrong?

 

If you all wouldn't mind, could you give a small prayer for his crew.

 

Barry

 

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Barry,

 

I don't know if it gets any easier -- my son is 12 -- 13 next week and my experience is that it keeps getting harder!!

 

I'll keep Kyle and his friends in my prayers -- and you too!

 

Let us know how he made out when you hear from him.

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I'll keep them in my prayers...

Repost when they get back, and let us know how the trip was.

 

And yes, I agree, it does seem to get more difficult. Maybe it's the process of letting go, trusting your child's own judgement, doubting that you've prepared them properly, etc.

 

We had two of our children reach 18 this year, graduate from High School, and now getting ready for college. We feel your pain!

 

Take care,

ASM59

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Hey thanks for the comforting replies. I know I'm over reacting, but I just needed to talk to some friends. I will let you know how things go, but they don't get off the water until Friday, which must be part of the plan for me to grow a little.

 

Later we will get into how to not overreact to a cute blond blue eyed daughter who just got on the pom squad. She seems very popular with the boys all of a sudden. I'm learning that as far as fatherhood goes, girls are different from boys.

 

At least I know Kyle is trained, how do I train her from boys.

 

Thanks all for everything.

 

Barry

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What's that old line about "having a piece of your heart walking around outside your body"?

 

 

Barry, I just went to my niece Jenn's wedding and her father (my brother inlaw) told this story about letting Jenn and her three sisters begin dating.

 

He'd give them a talk about how they might spend time with boys who would put them in uncomfortable situations. He gave them each a quarter and said to tell the boys, "Well, I'm not sure, but call my Dad. And if it's OK with him . . ." :) I'm thinking those twenty-somethings still carry around the original quarter!

 

Personally, I'm happier knowing I'll have to deal with JUST canoes and thunderstorms! I'd be a wreck if I had to worry about a "cute blond blue eyed daughter who just got on the pom squad"!!! ;) GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE!!! ;)

 

jd

 

 

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Barry,

 

I'm 48 and my mom is 75. Guess what? She still worries about me, my 2 brothers and my sister. Add to that 5 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren and I'm surprised she can still function! ;) I think she said something about prayer like you did. Hang in there. I'll keep Kyle and his crew in my prayers.

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Consider fingers crosses and prayers said.

It isn't the parenting that is hard. It is the turning lose that is hard. My daughter is 36, son 32. It was hard to realize that they were adults when they reached their late teens and early 20's. They are great kids and I am ever so proud of them. But it is still hard to let go.

 

My mother died when I was 48 and she always said the hardes thing about being a parent is not needing to be a parent.

She was a great lady and she and my dad are my heros to this day.

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(shhh! it's a secret that parenting is the hardest thing in the world! we can't let our kids know, or else we'll never have any grandkids! ;))

 

He'll do just fine.

You'd do fine, right?

He'll do fine, too!

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Eagledad,

 

As one man to another, I'm impressed that you're willing to admit that you worry so much over your son. It's often frowned upon, even among Christian circles. I applaud your character you not only have a loving heart, but the courage to share it with others. Women often get chided for mothering their children. The truth is, men are just as protective, and often worry more than the mothers. Its definitely possible to be overly concerned, but Ive seen far more examples of parents showing no concern at all. With that said, I think you should probably let go - at least a little.

 

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

 

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My wife and I had the same experience two summers ago when my son who was 15 at the time was at Northern Tier. In rained 9 days out of what was to be a ten day trip. On the next to last day the weather was so bad they fout 3 foot breakers to make their way to an island where they were landlocked for a full day. Wet, cold and unable to find enough room to set up camp they went through most of their provisions trying to stay warm.

 

Seeing a break in the weather ther pushed off a day later than expected with only crackers and mustard to eat for the last day heading into base camp.

 

THEY LOVED IT!!! It was an adventure that they talk about still. They stayed together, helped each other, made good decisions and survived without any injuries.

 

Your son will be fine, he will have an exciting tand challemgiong trip he will always remember.

 

Praying is always good, even when they aren't in trouble.

 

BW

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Luckily for the fathers of daughters, boys are also REALLY DUMB!! Not necessarily about canoes and storms, just about "cute blond blue eyed daughters who just got on the pom squad"!!!

 

Chill, she's your daughter - one way or another, she'll knock 'em out!

 

jd(This message has been edited by johndaigler)

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