Heard any good jokes lately?

[Scoutfish 16]

Q: What do you call a schizophrenic Leader?

A: A committee!

 

[frank10 12]

It's back, I remember posting to this back in 2005.

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I can't see an end. I have no control and I don't think there's any escape - I don't even have a home anymore. Definitely time for a new keyboard.

[oldisnewagain1 42]

At summer camp two leaders were talking when a scout holding a cup ran by. A few moments latter the same boy ran by them again with an empty cup. This happens a few more times before the Scoutmaster stops the scout to ask him what was going on. The scout replied "The mess hall is on fire" to which the Scoutmaster replied "You can't put out the fire with a cup of water." The Scout smiled and said "Water? This is gasoline."

[sailingpj 18]

" The Scout smiled and said "Water? This is gasoline." "

 

OMG, I know him!!!

[sailingpj 18]

I just came across this one.

 

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised my friend I would meet him half an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

 

The man below says, "Yes. You are in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above this field. You are between 40 and 42 degrees North latitude, and between 58 and 60 degrees West longitude."

 

"You must be an engineer," says the balloonist.

 

"I am," replies the man. "How did you know?"

 

"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I am still lost."

 

The man below says, "You must be a manager."

 

"I am," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

 

"Well," says the man, "you don't know where you are, or where you are going. You have made a promise which you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. The fact is you are in the exact same position you were in before we met, but now it is somehow my fault."