Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 (edited) I'm new and unsure where to go to about this. I have noticed our cub master likes to put people on blast over private matters/conversations. This time it was really over the top. Like I can understand reminding people not to smoke/drink during camping trips but this was just "wow". This is a situation I would think would have been best solved privately considering it was regarding a private conversation about another parent trying to intimidate and harass the other. It started spilling into occuring at meetings (following around, staring down at, etc) and there are concerns it will end up with kids noticing the tension. The harasser has already been put on final warning for an act of violence towards his own scout. This posting just made it an even more hostile environment, showing that the one being harassed is not welcome at all. It is a small group, so yes, everybody knows who it is about. No, it's not like the one being harassed is responsible for the others actions. It is uncalled for. Edited June 28, 2019 by Natgeo2019 Link to post Share on other sites
RememberSchiff 3662 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 @Natgeo2019 welcome to scouter.com 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ParkMan 1293 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Welcome @Natgeo2019! As I think you sensed, no - it's not necessary. There are just some people who like reply-all. Perhaps a direct word to the Cubmaster to let him know you find it uncomfortable to get these kind of emails. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 28, 2019 Author Share Posted June 28, 2019 (edited) 19 minutes ago, ParkMan said: Welcome @Natgeo2019! As I think you sensed, no - it's not necessary. There are just some people who like reply-all. Perhaps a direct word to the Cubmaster to let him know you find it uncomfortable to get these kind of emails. It isn't even an email. It is on a Facebook group site as an announcement. It is quite detailed. I sense there is hostility towards the one that was voicing concerns in that the master is accusing them of being a bully for doing so. Quite backward attitude. Not sure if the accused and the cubmaster are friends or what. It is just awful to cry about negativity when this in of itself is very hostile, negative and targeting. The one that came to the leaders in private was not causing problems around the kids, but they are acting if this is the case. It is a very sensitive subject matter and I am being vague here. I am afraid to speak up for fear of also being a target of another public rant. Don't make waves as they say... Eta: they say the issue is in the bylaws, but I can't find anywhere where it directly states one parent cannot discuss issues or notify a leader thereof, privately. Edited June 28, 2019 by Natgeo2019 Link to post Share on other sites
ParkMan 1293 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Politics are often the hardest part of Scouting. Lots of units politics end up getting in the way of brining good program to the Scouts. In my experience, there's generally three ways you can deal with someithng like this. talk to the person making waves and let them know you are uncomfortable publically shame them into stopping - i.e. your own post to Facebook or bringing it up at a leader's meeting go over the person's head and ask for someone to step in. i.e., the CC or COR supervises the Cubmaster and you could ask them to interviene As I mentioned before, I've found the first to be most effective. I find that a direct conversation can work wonders. I do find it helps to make it about you, not the other person. i.e. don't say - you shouldn't make posts like that. do say - we're a small community and it makes me really uncomfortable when to have this kind of conversation in front of everyone. Of course, personalities are different. You may find that taking this approach doesn't work with your Cubmaster's personality style. Link to post Share on other sites
Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 28, 2019 Author Share Posted June 28, 2019 2 minutes ago, ParkMan said: Politics are often the hardest part of Scouting. Lots of units politics end up getting in the way of brining good program to the Scouts. In my experience, there's generally three ways you can deal with someithng like this. talk to the person making waves and let them know you are uncomfortable publically shame them into stopping - i.e. your own post to Facebook or bringing it up at a leader's meeting go over the person's head and ask for someone to step in. i.e., the CC or COR supervises the Cubmaster and you could ask them to interviene As I mentioned before, I've found the first to be most effective. I find that a direct conversation can work wonders. I do find it helps to make it about you, not the other person. i.e. don't say - you shouldn't make posts like that. do say - we're a small community and it makes me really uncomfortable when to have this kind of conversation in front of everyone. Of course, personalities are different. You may find that taking this approach doesn't work with your Cubmaster's personality style. I have talked with the person it is about considering that we are friendly and I know what the situation is. It is very sad. This person is so horribly embarrassed that they don't plan on attending any events for at least awhile if not leaving entirely. Others feel the same way I do, but are not openly voicing their own feelings. I will try to find a way to bring it up amicably to see if the posting can be removed and further issues be dealt with privately, as I believe it should be. Link to post Share on other sites
FireStone 423 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 Does anyone else have access to the administer the fb group? It shouldn't be one person with total control over it, so things like this can be deleted. Link to post Share on other sites
Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 28, 2019 Author Share Posted June 28, 2019 Just now, FireStone said: Does anyone else have access to the administer the fb group? It shouldn't be one person with total control over it, so things like this can be deleted. One person/couple maintains it Link to post Share on other sites
FireStone 423 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 3 minutes ago, Natgeo2019 said: One person/couple maintains it That's a problem. Minimum 3 unrelated individuals should have admin rights to any unit social media accounts or unit website. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 28, 2019 Author Share Posted June 28, 2019 5 minutes ago, FireStone said: That's a problem. Minimum 3 unrelated individuals should have admin rights to any unit social media accounts or unit website. The only one posting claims to have other leaders they speak with and decide issues on with, but we have no idea who those others are. There are maybe 15 scouts at best in the entire unit. Link to post Share on other sites
perdidochas 658 Posted June 28, 2019 Share Posted June 28, 2019 1 hour ago, Natgeo2019 said: One person/couple maintains it As Firestone said. It's improper to just have a related couple as admins. it probably fits the letter of the law,though if two admins are involved. https://filestore.scouting.org/filestore/mission/doc/Social_Media_Guidelines.doc Link to post Share on other sites
Natgeo2019 1 Posted June 29, 2019 Author Share Posted June 29, 2019 I just noticed that the Two Deep policy was quoted here in trying to justify public shaming; says according to that policy one adult cannot privately speak with another about an ongoing issue. [The offender was provoking fights for no reason, the other wanted to squash it privately] Forgive me, but isn't that policy about having 2 adult leaders on outings for youth safety, not this kind of matter? Link to post Share on other sites
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