Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
ShutterbugMom

Do you repeat requirements?

Recommended Posts

So, new to the forum, but a situation came up recently where we were doing the sporting event thing for Games Tigers Play (cub scouts Tiger requirement).

 

One of the parents disagreed with the sporting event I chose (asked for input multiple times, didn't get any) and decided not to show up.  Now her son is in jeopardy of not receiving his belt loop.  Do I just ask them to go to an event of their choice and do A B and C or is this a situation where I need to bring the whole den again?

 

It seems unfair to the kids who took the time to meet to have to meet again due to this one parent's decision.

 

How do you disagree with a sporting event played by a den?  Please share the rest of the story.  Is soccer or kickball against someone's religion?  About the only sports I could legitimately see someone complain about are those with full contact - tackle football, rugby, etc.  Sounds like you might a have a future problem parent on your hands if they have issues with something this early and this benign. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

probably dodge ball...

which by the way has I think been among the most fun our boys have had in all of scouts so far....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

probably dodge ball...

which by the way has I think been among the most fun our boys have had in all of scouts so far....

 

I almost mentioned dodgeball, but was posting during a meeting and had to cut it short.  Dodgeball should be a required rite of passage - right up there with learning to swim and ride a bike.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Actually the sport was a rowing/crew.  Lots of high school teams were there, it involved racing, time-trials, etc.  The parent in question has a preference for the usual team sports, basketball, football, etc.  I wanted to expose the den to a sport that was relevant to the region I live in, is actually a challenging TEAM sport and requires planning and real effort to be successful.  Not unlike the other "traditional" sports.

 

I got some really good feedback from the other parents, the kids had fun, and everyone learned something new.  The cubmaster and all the leadership has been supportive.  But yeah, I'm thinking there may be a disconnect with this particular person.

Edited by Caramon45W

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Actually the sport was a rowing/crew.  Lots of high school teams were there, it involved racing, time-trials, etc.  The parent in question has a preference for the usual team sports, basketball, football, etc.  I wanted to expose the den to a sport that was relevant to the region I live in, is actually a challenging TEAM sport and requires planning and real effort to be successful.  Not unlike the other "traditional" sports.

 

I got some really good feedback from the other parents, the kids had fun, and everyone learned something new.  The cubmaster and all the leadership has been supportive.  But yeah, I'm thinking there may be a disconnect with this particular person.

 

That's a pretty weak move by that parent.  It's one thing to have a preference for certain sports, but it's another to be so narrow minded that you can't expose your kid to something out of your own norm.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Childhood is not the idealized growing up into what you are supposed to be in this world, it is growing up into what your parents expect you to be.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Actually the sport was a rowing/crew.  Lots of high school teams were there, it involved racing, time-trials, etc.  The parent in question has a preference for the usual team sports, basketball, football, etc.  I wanted to expose the den to a sport that was relevant to the region I live in, is actually a challenging TEAM sport and requires planning and real effort to be successful.  Not unlike the other "traditional" sports.

 

I got some really good feedback from the other parents, the kids had fun, and everyone learned something new.  The cubmaster and all the leadership has been supportive.  But yeah, I'm thinking there may be a disconnect with this particular person.

 

This family might need educating on the 'group' concept of scouting.  Their son should of attended to enjoy the company of his little buddies and build his social relationships and because he is part of the den.  I am not suggesting that you single them out for an type of communication, just all the tiger parents as a whole.

 

This most likely is the first "club" the son has been involved in.

 

Best of luck with your tiger year.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

In our Webelos den we have 9 boys.  We usually have about 7 in attendance at various meetings.  We have changed days to accommodate what we believed to be the most people. (We had a couple complaints a month after the fact....they had a chance to speak up but did not.)

 

So this weekend is the big pack camp out and we plan to do some of the Cast Iron Chef and Webelos Walkabout requirements, such as cooking a meal and completing the 3 mile hike.

 

Only 6 of the boys are coming.  So do we repeat the requirements at a den meeting or just tell them to complete them on their own?  

 

What do you usually do in your group?

 

I am a Webelos den leader with 12 regular scouts. In the beginning, I was a bit delusional, telling parents how imperative it was to attend all the meets between now and February so that we could get the requirements covered with plenty of time for each & then when sports hit, if they had to pick and choose, it would still give them a chance to do both along with letting their scout rank up. Of course, things happen and come up.  They can't make it every single time.

 

I wanted to go with the whole "if I don't see it, it doesn't count'" approach but there are some things that just won't work like that. For those who have made all the meets but say one, I have talked to their parents at the end of another meet, had them stay over and work with me and a few other scouts who didn't mind staying over to get them caught up (or close to it until the next meet.)

 

For those who have missed multiple meets, well, they've made no effort thus far to get with me about making the items up. Come B&G, if they haven't completed the adventures (to where I know they did and wasn't just told they did,) they will not rank up at that time. I'll offer once more to work with them with a few other scouts, if they're willing, after B&G to get them caught up before June 1st *but* I won't fudge the paperwork or award the rank to them just to be nice. I know a lot of people will but that patch isn't required to move up. If you want it, you're going to have to earn it. I will give a chance or two to catch up, as long as it doesn't hinder my scouts who do show up like they should but if I know they're not taking it seriously, I will not waste my time.

 

For Webelos Walkabout, we just voted on a definitive date to go on it. I had every parent give me input (half were at the meeting and voted then, the other half were through a phone call or text.) I will not make this up unless we have a legitimate reason to. Every single parent knows when it is and said that date worked for them. Barring horrible weather or an emergency, I expect them there.

 

We will see how it goes!

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I like the previous comment about "getting out of the one and done mentality".  

 

In a successful Boy Scout Troop, there are activities scheduled every month, if not every weekend.   The Scout (and his family?) always have the option of attending or not.  Hikes, campouts, movie nights with the Patrol, etc.  it is up to the boys to plan and the adults to support.

The Webelos Den  is intended to be an introduction to this "boy led" culture ("you mean I can do that?"), but it doesn't always happen.   One three mile hike and no more?  Surely there is more than one park or neighborhood trail they can explore.   Schedule them, with input from the parents (school calendar?).   Let the boys decide if it would be fun, and let them convince the parent that it is a good thing to put on the calendar.  Find another creek to pull crawdads from, another museum/zoo/historic ship to visit. 

Get a good tree ID book for yourself, or from the library, or enlist an uncle who can talk about how trees are important (?Scout Troop?)  and point out that hickory or white ash (baseball bats!) along the trail.

 

Scout Leaders are about OPPORTUNITY, not NECESSITY.   All you can do is OFFER, and teach:  By example, and instruction.   What they miss is their lose, .  Don't blame yourself too much. 

Oh, and go to RoundTable in your District.  You will find sympathetic Scouters there, both successful (you define!) and trying hard to be.  Learn from each other, enjoy each other's company.

 

See you on the trail!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

 

 

Oh, and go to RoundTable in your District.  You will find sympathetic Scouters there, both successful (you define!) and trying hard to be.  Learn from each other, enjoy each other's company.

 

 

 

Our Roundtable is a nightmare to put it politely. We have three packs in our district total and only people from our pack attend along with our DE, RT commissioner and a few others that have nothing to do with our pack. The meeting is based on how to bring in more money every single time (for said district.) Our suggestions are ignored and not everyone there is willing to help. Any time we bring up something we would like help or input about, we are told to address it at our PCM. So now, that's the only meet most of us leaders attend. Our Pack Committee Meets are amazing. I look forward to those every month. We have great leaders who are eager to help one another. I must say I'm jealous for those districts that apparently have great roundtables! 

 

(Had to get that out for us who have PCMs instead of RTs.) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Faith,

 

    My district's Cub and Boy Scout Roundtables have always been excellent, and the staff over the years has also been great. Some meetings better than others, but they've always asked for input (every July at a special Roundtable meeting) and used most of it. Sounds like Roundtable staff training is nonexistent or ignored.

    I will assume that PCM stands for Pack Committee Meeting. As long as everyone is somehow getting the district and council updates and sharing them at your PCM's, sounds like that's the next best thing to a correctly executed Roundable program.

 

Party on,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

sst3rd

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Faith,

 

    My district's Cub and Boy Scout Roundtables have always been excellent, and the staff over the years has also been great. Some meetings better than others, but they've always asked for input (every July at a special Roundtable meeting) and used most of it. Sounds like Roundtable staff training is nonexistent or ignored.

    I will assume that PCM stands for Pack Committee Meeting. As long as everyone is somehow getting the district and council updates and sharing them at your PCM's, sounds like that's the next best thing to a correctly executed Roundable program.

 

Party on,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

sst3rd

 

You are correct on PCM. We never had district roundtables until a year ago. We always had pack committee meets (mislabeled as roundtables) until then. Sometimes district people will attend but we get most of our info from online or calling around. The staff training is nonexistent, if it exists, we were never made privy to it. We will continue with our PCMs until we can do more at the RTs :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I like the previous comment about "getting out of the one and done mentality".  

 

In a successful Boy Scout Troop, there are activities scheduled every month, if not every weekend.   The Scout (and his family?) always have the option of attending or not.  Hikes, campouts, movie nights with the Patrol, etc.  it is up to the boys to plan and the adults to support.

The Webelos Den  is intended to be an introduction to this "boy led" culture ("you mean I can do that?"), but it doesn't always happen.   One three mile hike and no more?  Surely there is more than one park or neighborhood trail they can explore.   Schedule them, with input from the parents (school calendar?).   Let the boys decide if it would be fun, and let them convince the parent that it is a good thing to put on the calendar.  Find another creek to pull crawdads from, another museum/zoo/historic ship to visit. 

Get a good tree ID book for yourself, or from the library, or enlist an uncle who can talk about how trees are important (?Scout Troop?)  and point out that hickory or white ash (baseball bats!) along the trail.

 

Scout Leaders are about OPPORTUNITY, not NECESSITY.   All you can do is OFFER, and teach:  By example, and instruction.   What they miss is their lose, .  Don't blame yourself too much. 

Oh, and go to RoundTable in your District.  You will find sympathetic Scouters there, both successful (you define!) and trying hard to be.  Learn from each other, enjoy each other's company.

 

See you on the trail!

 

I totally understand about not having a "one and done" mentality.  However, it does seem ridiculous that the den leader would need to go one 3-4 hikes just to ensure everyone has had "time" to complete it, or doing the cooking, since that is a bunch of prep work.   We did the hike twice, the cooking twice, several other activities twice.   Out of our 9 boys, we have 6 I would consider "active."  Of the parents, two families really help a bunch.  However, I would like to see the other parents step and lead a bit.  Yes, we have asked.  Multiple times.  Via e-mail and straight to their face.  It's not just scouts -- the same people end up helping at scouts, at church, and at school.  In a perfect world, I wish each family would step up and lead an elective.  That would be WONDERFUL!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Whether it be a musical concert, a sport event, some form of entertainment, trip, or outing, NOONE out there is going it 3-4 times so that all the kids get a chance to sing, play or enjoy.  Every seasonal concert, every football game, every theater production meant you showed up when it was being held or you missed out on it.  End of discussion.

 

Where does it say that one has to do something over and over until everyone with other priorities out there gets a chance to participate?  Sorry, Charlie, the train has left the station.  Once for sure, twice is nice, but that's about it for most events.

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

×