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BDPT00

A New Video Regarding Kids With Special Needs

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@@BDPT00, if you find any units that have experience with Autism-spectrum kids you might want to direct them here. They can work with this organization to get "certified" as Autism-friendly. The families with Autistic kids are great at finding sites like this. If these families can find troops accepting of such kids it may reduce placing these kids in the wrong unit to begin with. 

 

I suspect the biggest problems come from ADD/ADHD kids. Families with kids with more profound needs usually ask a ton of questions and know before they enter a unit if that group will be right or wrong. It is the ADD/ADHD spectrum -- or parents who don't give a darn -- who may not do that due diligence. Well, that's been my experience.@ might have another perspective.

Edited by Bad Wolf

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And yet again . . . Thank you.  I'll check it out.  Never seen this site before.

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Of course this problem isn't just a unit issue either.  We had a unit that had a SM who would take in any kid into the program.  A lot of them had physical and emotional problems.  Well, the SM's wife became ill and he had to drop scouting.  No one wanted to take over the program because of all the special needs kids and so the troop folded.  How do I know this?  4 years later I have started my new troop 2 blocks away from where this unit's COR was.  The council made sure the boys had all given up on the idea of BSA before asking me to start a troop.

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First BPT00 I have a son with special needs High functioning autism and your statement   "These kids can be a real pain in the butt" is the main reason I do not tell people he is unless they need to know.  Then and only then I do not tell them until after they meet him thanks Badwolf for standing up to her !!!

 

Now for the families that left because of the special the only way I can see that working in there favor was if the kid was violent other wise do not let the door hit you on the way out.

 

I also agree with the no baby  sitting option I have been to most of my sons den meetings working as Assent Den leader function for most of the time just recently is asked his den leader if I can have my den meetings at the same time and if she can handle him her response was "Hell yes his is a dream to deal with"

 

I went to cub collage and they had a kids program for our kids I dropped him off and then during one of the breaks checked in on the Leader and asked how we was doing she told me he is doing fine then told me about how her son has the same issues and not to worry about it.

basically he makes me become more of a helicopter parent then I want to be.   

 

One I am starting to tear up as I write this scouts has done more for my son in the two years almost that he as been in the program then school.  He is gaining self confidence making friends something he does not do at all (because he does not care). He really loves the program and I would be really upset if somebody in my pack said "Ether he goes or I go" just because he will sing the same tune over and over again uselessly TNT DYNAMITE.

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@@BDPT00, if you find any units that have experience with Autism-spectrum kids you might want to direct them here. They can work with this organization to get "certified" as Autism-friendly. The families with Autistic kids are great at finding sites like this. If these families can find troops accepting of such kids it may reduce placing these kids in the wrong unit to begin with. 

 

I suspect the biggest problems come from ADD/ADHD kids. Families with kids with more profound needs usually ask a ton of questions and know before they enter a unit if that group will be right or wrong. It is the ADD/ADHD spectrum -- or parents who don't give a darn -- who may not do that due diligence. Well, that's been my experience.@ might have another perspective.

I'm sorry but I haven't had a chance to watch the videos yet.  The link Bad Wolf provided is the same organization that I noted as well.

 

I think there is a relationship between how profoundly a child is affected because, if for no other reason, the parents have to get over their denial faster that parents of children that are more NT.  That said, there are plenty who never get over their denial and simply disengage.  Unfortunately, my experience is it is usually the father.

 

the thing that goes unmentioned too often with the parents, and the reason you get the tears @@BDPT00, is that by the time their boy is boy scout age they've already been engaged full time, for 8 or 9 years, in the fight for services, fights with the schools for accommodations, arrogant comments from people in restaurants telling them they need to discipline their child better or leave, child-rearing experts who can't spell autism telling them their kid is just a picky eater and if he went to bed hungry a few times he'd get over it, fearful that every time the phone rings that their boy had a meltdown at school, etc. Being always on guard/on watch makes one suspicious of about everybody.

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I was an ASM for many years and currently a Special Olympics coach in several sports for a longer time. I have a now adult son with autism. I gave up on scouting because of how the adults treated my son, not how the kids treated him. The boys were great. My son's paperwork was always getting lost by the adults. He completed requirements up to three times for some badges before the adults would finally admit he had done the work. The last straw was when the troop decided to work on the disabilities awareness merit badge. They did not tell me and scheduled it when I would be out of town for a Special Olympics event. The boys told me about it and what they were required to do to get the badge. They did not cover the requirements and gave out the merit badges for showing up and drawing a wheel chair.

As an engineer, I am driven to find the root causes of a problem and it became clear there are two issues: 1. Some individuals see a special needs child achieving a merit badge or rank advancement as cheapening the accomplishment for their own son. 2. The second is a more broad issue. Some religious thought see cognitive challenges as a result of poor parenting.

The former can be addressed though leadership but the second has it's origins in the very organizations that sponsor most scout troops. My autistic son's older brother is an eagle scout and an accomplished officer in the military. My autistic son's younger sibling is an outstanding ivy league student who has done charitable work on several continents for a summer job. I will put the results of my parenting up against anyone.

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@@Ahoydave, sorry you went through that...and more sorry for your son. I wish you lived near my unit...your son likely would have Eagled faster than some of the other kids we have.

 

I've found that being an Eagle at heart is by far MORE important than being an Eagle on paper....or being a "paper Eagle".

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Ahoydave,

I'm very confused by your statement regarding religion, cognitive challenges, and parenting.  Can you clarify that?

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I had been a scout leader since my older son was a Tiger cub through eagle scout and on to college. I took the experience of my autistic son to show me the reality I was blind to.

 

The concept that autism, ADD, ADHD etc. is a result of bad parenting is not unusual particularly in conservative churches. It has even been promoted on conservative talk radio.

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I had been a scout leader since my older son was a Tiger cub through eagle scout and on to college. I took the experience of my autistic son to show me the reality I was blind to.

 

The concept that autism, ADD, ADHD etc. is a result of bad parenting is not unusual particularly in conservative churches. It has even been promoted on conservative talk radio.

I'm a member of the one most conservative religions on the planet and no one, from priest to pope, promote that these things are the result of bad parenting. I do know some churches that are that are that whacked out, but not the religion itself.

 

If you're willing to share I'd be curious to know what denomination was pushing this agenda.

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I'm with Bad Wolf.  This sounds like a very broad brush statement, and I don't agree with it at all. 

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