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Not Quite Right in the Head - Our Responsibilities?


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This thread was spun from another thread.

 

"Aspergers syndrome.....gives me pause for a number of reasons in the troop......"

 

Yep. I've got one in the troop. No social skills. Aggressive (chased my son around with a sharp pencil), sullen, surly, unmotivated, brilliant.

Helicopter mom went to SLT and ITOLs to get herself ASM status to enable more hovering.

 

 

I'm all conflicted about this one:

 

Con: Mom is a pain in the butt, with social skills only marginally better than her son.

Pro: I'm sorta glad mom's around to sit on him.

 

Con: This boy requires way more patience, time, and attention than ten other boys.

Pro: This boy is the type that really could benefit from Scouting.

 

Pro: His first trip with the troop was our annual shooting trip where he qualified for his rifle shooting merit badge.

Con: Oh SH*T! We taught him to shoot.

 

 

We had hoped that he wasn't crossing over into our troop from WeebII. Announced intentions were for him to go back to the troop he had come from; but he's ours now.

 

I do know that I'll be extra nice and conciliatory whenever I have to hold him back or deny him advancement. He's been with us for ten months and still hasn't attained Tenderfoot. How do you teach character to a child who KNOWS that he is smarter than you, and only lights up when you hand him a loaded rifle?

 

And I really don't want him to know where I live.

 

Who else is in this boat? What are we gonna do?

 

 

They don't pay me enough for this....

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If you've met one kid with Asperger's, you've met one kid with Asperger's. Each Scout is an individual. We're in the character building and responsible citizenship business. Let's focus on that. A

in that boat with you.

 

 

have one that has no control over his frustration and anger and will strike out at anything close.....people objects doesn't matter. The best part, it is now a very well practiced excuse the boy spouts over and over and over again for everything.

 

If I feel he is ever a threat to the other scouts or scouters I will have him removed from the troop. That is my right to do so......

 

Irregardless what the self righteous do gooders say here..... I am not a trained mental health profession, I am not a social worker, I don't get paid for this..... I am just a youth scout that has grown up to be a SM for my son and his friend.

 

If that little angry autstic time bomb is going off, it isn't going to be on my watch or on my scouts

 

 

I know that not all autistic young men are violent....I have one out of 6 that is violent.

 

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Ya know the best part of your story Joebob....

 

 

If it ever happens that your little time bomb goes off. The news reporter with the bright red lip stick and the too short skirt will report in a serious somber voice " The shooter learned to about GUNS and shooting in the Boy Scouts".

 

I required mom to attend our shooting night with him.....which was the deal breaker.....cuts into her drinking time.

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BD- I agree 100%. I don't have the skills to deal with these kind of situations. Not in my pay grade,

 

We had one scout a few years ago with Aspergers. Had to delay advancement too. One summer camp he threw a knife at his Patrol Leader. His dad was in camp, and we sent them home and subsequently asked them to leave the troop. When safety is involved, you can't be hesitant.

 

Dale

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not dealt with this exact issue, but high functioning autism... dad came along on campouts... and the boy I first met I would've never guessed would be the young man I saw graduate from high school.

 

yes, if worried for safety of others - that comes first in my book. If parent can keep that under control then great, if not then no-go.

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We got a few and each is different. The Asperger's kid is actually the best one, but he doesn't stick with stuff, feels bad about it, eventually quits. I'm hoping he'll come back.

 

The behavior disorder kid gets a short leash. Violence = go home. The worst this kid has done was throw punches, and he manned up an apologized to the troop. He has eventually learned to walk away from situations that anger him. Now, he knows to send himself home. A parent is always with him.

 

If a parent doesn't agree with how we treat a kid or what we expect from them because their kid needs help, we show them the door.

 

If a boy gets a suspension from school, we expect to know the when, how and why, and the boy had better give a solid plan for improving in the future.

 

Some slower than others, but most kids who have us deal with them quickly and directly like that keep coming back better than before.

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Oh, and the kid who snuck a gun into camp? Not one of the "bad" or "crazies."

 

So, yeah, deal with the problem personalities, but don't ever think that in doing so, you've dealt with the problems!

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Councils need to establish special needs umits with paid professionals who are not only SMs, CMs, DLs, but are also professionally certified to deal with things like behavioral and neurological challenges.

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We had a special needs troop in our council, but it was mainly Down's Syndrome guys and they were a joy to work with. I spent a week of summer camp one year trying to teach one to swim. The autism/Aspergers guys seem to get "mainstreamed" because that's what parents demand of the schools. My wife, the school nurse, has a full class of emotionally disturbed kids this year, and she is ready to retire because of it. Every day is filled with screaming, violence and bodily carrying out of control kids down the hall. That's not fair to the other kids who are trying to learn. There is no "learning" taking place in this class...it is free babysitting and the parents are taking full advantage of it.

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Common guys. There are "normal" boys in our Troop who have gone on to commit crimes and special needs boys who take more work but can be great scouts and you can make a real impact in a life. It is heavy lifting and not for everyone.

 

It is a case by case thing. Each boy is an individual.

 

This is a well traveled thread and I think a consensus is no one has to tolerate a violent boy and that if a boy is high maintenance a parent needs to step in and support the unit to take up the slack.

 

BSA should not create special needs units but needs to step up with better support and tools for difficult scouts, period. But then my experience is (in Florida)the schools and churches do almost nothing. I have a special needs scout and basically we are on our own.

 

 

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"Not quite right in the head"

That's quite a label for someone who just happens to be wired a little differently. Does the prejudice stop at Asperger's, or do you include ADD and ADHD in this bucket of kids you don't want in your troop? Kicking them out of the unit isn't part of the solution. You might well be one of the most important people in this young man's life, and you're throwing away the opportunity. Do you want to help him succeed, or do you want to toss him aside, just like everyone else in our society? Thanks for helping.

BDPT00

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" The autism/Aspergers guys seem to get "mainstreamed" because that's what parents demand of the schools."

 

No, actually, its the schools that want them mainstreamed, they don't want the hassle of separate lesson plans, separate homework objectives, accommodations, etc.

 

We found as they got older there were no real accommodations so we dropped the IEPs.

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