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Inappropriate CubMaster Actions?


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I agree with Pack212scouter. I think we can get whipped up in a fury and get into "groupthink" mode really easy when it comes to kids. It starts out with peeing in the woods, "well, it could have been (fill in the blank with outrageous MINOR possibility).."Yeah, and even (fill in the blank with something that probably won't happen yet a little bit more outrageous)" You see where I'm going. Something like the "yeah, and MURDER!!!" quote from the movies.

 

Did the other adults/leaders have much to say about it? If it has been mentioned in the previous posts, I must have missed it. Either approach the CM in private about it (You and the others who noticed it and called it a problem) OR bring it up at the next leaders meeting or Committee meeting. Give the guy a warning before you start calling it a YP issue, calling the COR, etc. Good grief, volunteers are hard to find, much less volunteers who are energetic and actually excited to be there.

 

 

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"Not in this house"

 

That is the comment I have made (and my goodly wife) when something comes up (came up... they are all much older now) with our kids and a possible action. "But Mr. Xyz said it was okay".. No. Not with our kids... And here is why...

Our children always knew if we had a standard of behavior "in our house" then they were expected to behave the same way in someone elses house. AND we were always ready to explain why. If not right then ("because I said so!") then at a not-too-much-later time.

Potty humor? Peeing within sight of others? Making fun of others physical appearance or body parts (booty?)? I made clear that MY children were better than that.

Sanitation? Have that Scouter read "How to Sh*t in the Woods" by Kathleen Meyer. The polluting of rural watersheds begins with improper disposal of human waste. Teach your Cubs to pee wherever they get the urge and the next step is defecating along the trail whenever they get the urge. We are not only teaching backwoods ettiquette here, but how to be "gentlemen " and "ladies" in ALL situations.

 

When an older Scout was observed by me making fun of another Scouts ethnic name, I spoke to his dad and presto, the problem stopped.

 

I have not seen in this thread much mention of the OTHER parents attitude here. Do they consider it "cute"? Or are they bowing to the named "official", the CM?

YP issues, sanitation, respect for the environment, LNT, "polite society" behavior, encouraging maturity, Scout Promise and Law issues

(Courtesy, Kind, Obedient, Healthy, Clean,), this CM needs at beast a sit down and coffee talk and at worst a facilitated confrontation with the Pack Committee.

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Wow. What a story. Guys like this have no business wearing a uniform.

 

My response is much simpler. I don't care if their parent is present or not. I don't wait for the parent to notice their child, if I see a Scout behaving inappropriately I call it out. Yes, it takes guts. But after the first time, it gets a lot easier.

 

parents misbehaving? I treat that one a lot more tenderly. I call the parent aside, and in the view of other parents (similar to youth protection setups) tell them that their actions are inappropriate for the outing and to politely get with the program. If they cannot, I ask them to leave. Truly, I had this conversation as a Tiger Leader with our Committee Chair years ago. No one else would do it, but it had to be said. CC quit the following day. Yes, it took a little time getting someone else to stand up but the Pack was much better for it.

 

Difficult decision, ugly circumstance but the Pack was stronger for it. Could I have left? Yes. But that was my school, my sons friends and things needed to change. I decided that as uncomfortable as it was, I wanted him in that pack so I would need to be the "point of change."

 

KJ- you had the strength to call it out here in this forum, and you do have the strength to do it in a meeting or campsite.

 

Go for it.

CMM

 

CMM(This message has been edited by Cubmaster Mike)

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