Tiger Badge without Earning it

[IllowaScouter 10]

Yep, I worked with my son on all of the Tiger requirements that I could. The other parents weren't helping their sons with the requirements. All Tigers got the Tiger badge at B&G, even though we only did one (1) den requirement for the badge. I feel cheated, but at least I know I tried to do the right thing. Hell, I think only 2 of us had the book. A few Tiger parents left scouts because no one was working on the requirements.

[Fancifulmist 10]

I am also facing this issue with my Tiger Cub den. In January, our small pack merged with another local pack. In our Tiger den (even before we merged), I was covering ALL requirements during the den meetings. When our two packs merged, I was suddenly faced with picking-up 3 boys from the other pack who had obtained their Bobcat badge without knowledge of ANY of the requirements!! These boys could not state the motto, promise,law or demonstrate the handshake, salute etc. We are getting them up-to-speed through weekly repetition of these things but it is apparent that most parents don't reinforce or review anything with their sons.

We had a Pack meeting last night in which MOST of the boys (5 out of 7) earned their Wildlife Conservation belt loop. The two who didn't earn the award hadn't attended the last den meeting where we reviewed ALL of the requirements and had fun doing it! While I was awarding the 5 boys, the mother of one of the boys who hadn't earned the award hollered out angrily in front of the entire audience, "What about MY son, ____?" I was embarrassed, her son was humiliated. I explained that I simply could not give any child an award if they had not earned it through attendance and participation at the weekly den meetings. After the award ceremony, this mother angrily confronted me in front of my den again and stated, "This is kind of late to find out about this now! He went to the go-see-it! Why didn't he also get this award?" At this point her son burst into tears. I explained that the go-see-it didn't pertain to this award and this award had been earned through participation at the last den meeting. I explained that the requirements could be easily met at home before the next den meeting, where I would discuss what he had learned and that he would then be awarded the belt loop at the next Pack meeting. She stalked away and then confronted me angrily AGAIN near the end of our dinner. Once I was home (emotionally spent), I emailed LENGTHY letters to ALL of the parents detailing each and every achievement that each boy had to complete before earning their Tiger Cub Badge and how to complete them. Most of my boys don't have their books even at this date! I then offered my email and cell phone number (as I do with every Den emailing) and asked people to contact me with any questions. In reply I received a nastily toned letter AGAIN re: her anger. At this point, I so frustrated at having to repeat things nine million times to a person who doesn't seem to listen or care until her son doesn't get a badge! Any suggestions?

[Snow_White 10]

Fancilfulmist,

 

Sorry that you hear about this kind of ordeal - it is hard on kids, parents, and DL's.

 

I wanted to point out, however, that parents are the primary Akela for belt loops and pins, and that the Scout is not required to review what he did with his den leader in order to earn the belt loop. If you had notified the den in advance what was being covered at the den meeting, the Scout might have been able to complete it at home and be called up with the rest of his denmates to receive the award. (Of course, there are always parents that need to be a PITA, and you can't fix that.)

 

Not trying to be too critical, but I can see the situation from both sides.

 

[Greaves 10]

FancifulMist, I want to cry for that boy.

 

I'm a Webelos Den Leader, and most of my boys received their (earned) rank last night. I made time beforehand to talk to the one boy farthest away from the award, and sort of went over the things he needs to do to earn his rank. I made time afterwards to talk to his parent about what the son needs to do. Everyone was very chill about it--but I'm working with forth graders. They are more emotionally mature than the Tigers.

 

I have a lot of absentee kids, especially during the seasons--football, baseball, soccer, whatever. I send a den-wide email after every meeting, so that every parent knows what we did, where they can learn the requirements, and so on. It might be overkill, but I would far far rather over-do it than under-do. That kind of communication makes it hard for a parent to work the "I didn't know!" excuse.

 

The wildlife conservation belt loop requires a boy report to his den on an endangered species.

[ScoutNut 147]

Why is it that the boys do not have their Handbooks yet? Is there a problem with cost? Can the Pack, or the Charter Organization help out? If this is a problem in all of the Pack's dens, then you might consider having a discussion at your next Pack Leader's Meeting on including Handbooks in your Pack's budget for next year.

 

Are your adult Tiger Partners attending every Tiger meeting and outing with their Tiger?

 

Were the Tiger Teams aware they were working on the Wildlife belt loop? Were they aware that the belt loop was to be finished at that den meeting?

 

Are you using Shared Leadership at all? For the Tiger Teams who are not getting things done at home, have them run a meeting for one of the requirements they are missing.

 

Since most of the boys do not have the Handbook (still boggles my mind), it is hard to expect them to know what to do at home. Give them specific "homework". Let them know that for the following meeting they are to do a chore at home together, and then share what they did with the rest of the den. Do a den newsletter with all of the info on it and hand it to the Adult Partner each week.

 

Perhaps you can copy pages from the Tiger Handbook for those who do not have it.

 

For Bobcat, the Tigers do NOT have to MEMORIZE ANYTHING. They simply have to SAY, and in some cases explain, and DO. Most of the requirements can be accomplished in 1 or 2 den meetings. With repetition throughout the year, and in coming years, it eventually becomes second nature to the Scouts. Again include the Adult Partners in this. Do a relay race of Partner vs Tiger, sticking words to the Promise and Law up on a board in the correct order. How are/did the parents complete the YP section if they do not have the Handbook?

 

 

[Snow_White 10]

"The wildlife conservation belt loop requires a boy report to his den on an endangered species."

 

Good point, I didn't check the requirements on this one specifically. Most of the belt loops can be completed at home without den involvement.

 

 

[Fancifulmist 10]

Hi everyone,

Thank you for your responses. To answer some of the questions raised:

 

1. I have had a Den website that I run in order to keep everybody informed. This includes a calender of events, links to our Council events, what we are planning for the next den meeting and a complete list of the Bobcat requirements listed for everyone on the website. I have a monthly calender that is printed out and distributed at the den meetings along with a schedule of event with a weekly breakdown that lists EXACTLY what will be covered at each den meeting and what Achievements the activity fulfills.

 

2. Most of the boys from the merged den do not have their handbooks. Out of 7 boys, we have 3 boys who have their handbooks. It is not a question of money, but motivation on the part of the parents to buy it. I have requested them to buy it, I have offered to go purchase the books myself if they will just give me the money to cover the cost of the handbooks all to no avail. I request at each week's den meting for the boys to please bring their handbooks to the next meeting. Aside from purchasing the books on my dime, which I cannot afford to do, there is not much else I can do. We have asked our Cubmaster if we could use some of the money from popcorn sales to help purchase books, but we were told that it would not be fair to purchase individual equipment/supplies for boys when the popcorn sale was accomplished by the pack as a whole. In essence, unless the purchase will benefit the pack as a whole, we will not be given funds to help cover any costs other than arts/crafts supplies for den meetings. Again, I just started as a Tiger Den leader this past Oct/Nov of '09. So, this is all new to me as well. @ Scoutnut: thank you for the suggestion! It would be very worthwhile to discuss just adding the cost to the Pack's budget as I have noticed this problem with MOST of the boys in the Pack, regardless of the den.

 

3. Until I took over, the Tiger Cubs were being dropped off by their parents. Most parents would leave and return to pick them up at the end of the meeting. I sent out an email reminding parents that Tigers had to have an adult partner present at all times and the parents have been good about staying during the meeting for the past month or two. However, they do not interact with their sons during the meeting for the most part. Some parents are great and are VERY involved which I love. That is the way its supposed to be! I have 3 Tiger parents who are great and help run the meetings/activities. We share as much leadership as possible between the 4 of us. For the young man mentioned in the incident, NOTHING is being done at home, which is why I try and cover everything at the den meetings so he won't fall behind. I feel horribly for him as well and had discussed with him privately how easily we can make sure he earns this award before the next Pack meeting. Emotionally he seemed disappointed, but he did not erupt into tears until his mother spoke out in anger. This young man has some pretty significant aggressive and hyperactive behavioral issues but not anything we leaders can't redirect. His parents have always dropped him off and left until I asked everyone to stay. When they do attend meetings, his mother seems angry that she has to be there so I feel very sorry for the guy

 

4. @ Scouter: We do the relay race and other games to reinforce all the Bobcat requirements. I even made postcards with the words to the Law, the Promise and the motto printed on it. We use these at the beginning of every meeting to reinforce the concepts. What concerns me is that none of the boys from the merged den know even the 3-word motto and they have been Tiger Cubs since June '09! I'm not sure how the parents completed the YP requirements without handbooks because my den merged with theirs after they had been awarded the Bobcat badges.

 

Sorry for the long-winded replies...just trying to give these boys a good quality program. Thank you so much for the critiques and advice!

 

 

 

[ScoutNut 147]

Fanciful - Just a suggestion, at your next Tiger meeting have each parent sit, stand, kneel, whatever, right next to their Tiger. Explain to them they are a TEAM and will be working together in everything. Do not let any of them off the hook. Do not let any of them sit in a corner. Treat them like large Tigers. They do the games, songs, crafts, what have you, right along with their Tiger.

 

Have an opening ceremony for each den meeting (flag, Promise, Law, etc). Assign a different Team to lead it each time. Make sure they have the materials they need to do this.

 

Have a closing ceremony for the end of each den meeting. I always like using the Living Circle. You can incorporate everyone in it, including any siblings who happen to be there. We say the Motto as we do the Circle.

 

You need to get these parents invested in the program, and build the feeling of everyone being a part of the group.

 

It sounds like your Pack as a whole could use some help. Have you taken any training yet? Go to Roundtable, and drag some of the Pack leaders with you.

 

Good Luck!

 

[Fancifulmist 10]

Hi Scoutnut! Again, thanks for the recommendations! Luckily, I had always run the den meetings with the flag ceremony (Pledge, Promise and the Law) and I close with the Living Circle as well ("Akela, we'll do our best!) The boys have been using the printed cards I made to read the Promise and the law during the opening ceremony, but I honestly never thought about using different Tiger/Adult partner teams take turns leading it! Great idea! I will email all the parents about sitting next to their Tiger Cub today and then repeat it at the den meeting next week! I have done all the online training but still have to do my Leader Specific Training (scheduled tomorrow morning) and BALOO (which I will do on 5/1/10). I'd love to do Lord Baden Powell University, just don't have enough money to do so. I am a full-time RN, run a legal nurse consulting business on the side, volunteer at my boys' school and have 4 children under the age of 7!! But, I love Scouting and how this program positively affects boys' lives. I have two cousins (brothers), who are both Eagle Scouts, then West Point grads and are now Lt.Col and Col in the US Army (not to mention avid outdoorsmen and phenomenal civil engineers). They grew up in the worst area of town where I am originally from in upstate NY. Their parents kept them on the right track through Scouting/Church/sports activities. I plan to do the same for my three young boys and Daisy/Brownies/Girl Scouts for my toddler girl when she is of age! Just kind of frustrated dealing with a little parental negativity and lack of involvement with some parents Is this a common occurrence? If so, has any den leader ever successfully converted these parents into being involved.....ever?? Just want to know there is some hope! As far as the advancement goes, ALL of my boys will earn their Tiger badge by the time they graduate to the Wolf den on June 1st and we will have fun doing it!

On a positive note, we have already begun planning our camping activities this summer and everybody is excited! BTW, we as a Pack have agreed that all the current den leaders will "follow" their son's den as they advance. So, I will become the Wolf Den leader on June 1st. Do you think this is a good idea?

[ScoutNut 147]

Ahhh, some are easier to "convert" than others. But it is possible, so hang in there! You just have to make them really feel a part of the program. Unfortunately, there will always be those few who just don't get it, and some who are just downright nuts (sorry to say!).

 

Having the leaders move up with their dens is pretty much the traditional way to do it. I am glad to hear that you will be their Wolf leader next year.

 

Have fun at training and BALOO!