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Son is ready for palms, but does not want SM conference


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Younger son Patrick earned Eagle last June. He has enough merit badges for gold palm, yet he still hasn't asked for a SM Conference for his bronze.

 

Since, as his SM and Mom I can't do his SM Conference, I asked him about it and if he'd like me to find someone else to do it. He said "nah, I'm busy right now being SPL. And, you know, with band and school and all..." Then he said, "I'll just wait till after the summer working at camp and next year I'll work on getting the palms signed off."

 

You know, it's never been about the advancement for him, so I guess this just goes with who he is. Still, I wonder if he will feel badly about it later that he was eligible for the palms, but just didn't take the time to sit for a SM conference and BOR. Then again, he has 18 months until he turn 18. Maybe he will find the time.

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Yeah, such is life sometimes. Sometimes some of the kids just need a kick. How hard are the conferences in your troop?

 

Some kids I'd just let it go. Other times I might steamroll their objections. Have an ASM track down your son, sit down with him, and do the conference. He may even thank them for doing it.

 

Just FYI, I don't think there is any BSA rule that you can't do the Scoutmaster conference. It may be your rule as Scoutmaster, but you could change that if you wanted to.

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I don't know that palms mean all that much to a lot of kids (or adults). People make such a big to-do out of Eagle and I suppose that's understandable, but palms are relatively easy to earn, don't get the same recognition/hoopla, and maybe they are kind of an anticlimax.

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I think Lisa is right. I earned one palm and I hardly remember anything about it. I'm sure I no longer have it. My son earned two, but only because I kept reminding him that he might as well just do it if he had the merit badges. After Eagle, it just doesn't seem very important. GWD, I'm sympathetic to your son.

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After striving to achieve Eagle, the palms seemed anti-climatic. I was working on my silver when I turned 18...I needed two more requirements for the Public Health MB but the counselor couldn't see me the day before I turned 18. It's my own fault for waiting till the last minute, and knew it even then.

 

Not finishing the palm doesn't bother me. In fact, the bronze and gold palms were pretty casual affairs.

 

I imagine your son is enjoying not being on the advancement fast track, and if he's concentrating on his SPL role, kudos to him...it speaks volumes because he's giving back to the younger scouts, and honing his leadership skills...much more valuable than the palms.

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In reply, yes, not doing his SM conference since I'm his Mom is a self-imposed rule. Don't want any appearance of favoritism.

 

Our former SM who serves on our Committee just to help with Boards of Review did his SM Conference for Eagle.

 

Yeah, I guess palms are somewhat anticlimactic after earning Eagle. Older son earned a silver palm and who knows where the pin is.

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Oops, my bad! I do have it. It's still pinned onto the medal, DUH! But it goes to show how little the palm means, to me at least, I didn't even remember it was there and I've seen that medal many times - without noticing the palm. GWD, this is one of those things that isn't worth the sweat.

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I only earned 2 MBs after Eagle, enough for Bronze and Gold Palms. I am proud of them to this day.

 

In the troop I serve, no one in active memory has completed their BOR early enough to follow through with a palm. Then again, I don't think any of our Eagle had enough MBs for a palm. However, that should change in a year or so. We have a Star scout (transfer) who already has enough badges (short of a handfull of Eagle reqd) to have 3 palms. In spite of the "rumors" of him from his original troop, I have found him to be engaging, energetic, have excellent skills, is very respectful, yet is pleasantly mischeivious. In 3 months, he has already had an impact on our other scouts and I hope he will continue to do so.

 

But back to palms. To some scouts, it is just not important. Looking back, it would have been nice to have picked up a silver (and I had many opportunities to do other MBs), but I have no regrets that I did not go that far. Even after earning my palms, I stayed active as a youth for another 5 years (including Sea Exploring).

 

I am sure he will feel fine about his decision.

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Skipper, not to be a drudge or anything but you said "I only earned 2 MBs after Eagle, enough for Bronze and Gold Palms." Doesn't it take 5 additional merit badges and three months active time in a patrol to earn a palm? That was what I had to do to earn mine.

 

I am just asking.

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If your son discussed his palms with you the SM, it sounds as if he has done his SM conference. It doesn't have to be anything official, just a conference. It sounds as if he isn't interested in the palms so that should be the end of it. His only step left is BOR which he'll have to set up with the CC and committee. All you can do at this point is give him encouragement to follow through. It might be a good idea to find out the reason why he is reluctant to follow through. It may take a few "SM Conferences" to get your answer.

 

Stosh

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I agree with pretty much everyone else. I got my Eagle just shy of 16 and continued to be active in both Scouts and Exploring even taking on leadership roles in my OA lodge. I just never felt the palms were that important and didn't mind not getting them.

 

Granted, I needed three more merit badges to earn even the first palm, so maybe that had something to do with it, since I wasn't really interested in getting more merit badges. If I had all the badges done,though, I probably would have found the 5-10 minutes necessary for a SM Conference.

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