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Not Quite Right in the Head - Our Responsibilities?

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  • #61
    There's a not-so-fine line between conduct disorder and autism spectrum.

    And, that's exactly what committees are for. If a parent wants us to work magic with a kid, but won't come hiking and camping and be at the ready to take the boy home the minute he can't contain himself, then it's time to put and end to long suffering.

    Comment


    • fred8033
      fred8033 commented
      Editing a comment
      Agree with the not-so-fine line between conduct disorder and autism spectrum.

      BUT ... if a parent won't come hiking and camping ... that's not the solution either. There is a fine line here. Scouts need to work with scouts. Parents and adults need to be kept at arms length. Our troop has been very flexible and parents have helped greatly when the kids are autistic or other "ability" issues. But it's very different to need the parent to attend because you anticipate bad behavior and the scout being asked to leave camp. IMHO, you've got a bad situation. Scouting is about independence and trust. If you know he won't be able to contain himself fairly regularly (once a camp out or even every other camp out), then you don't TRUST him and scouting is probably not the right answer for him.

      IMHO, it's the job of the CC to deal with these situations quickly and delicately. Most importantly, deal with them. If that means removing the scout, so be it.
      Last edited by fred8033; 03-09-2013, 02:49 AM.

  • #62
    >>Scouting is about independence and trust. If you know he won't be able to contain himself fairly regularly (once a camp out or even every other camp out), then you don't TRUST him and scouting is probably not the right answer for him.

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    • #63
      In general I'd agree with you. I don't need a parent up my craw any more than a boy does. But if a parent is willing to sit quietly with us on the opposite side of the field and the boy is able to come to him/her to avert total meltdown, and the parent is someone the other boys can relate to a little, and the boy gets better and better as he matures ... plus we learn something about the boy that helps us understand what makes him tick. I chalk it up to a positive.

      We've seen it happen. We can work with that.

      Comment


      • #64
        >>Scouting is about independence and trust. If you know he won't be able to contain himself fairly regularly (once a camp out or even every other camp out), then you don't TRUST him and scouting is probably not the right answer for him.<<

        The worst moment of my scouting experience was telling two very good parents that their mentally retarded son was not safe on campouts. They knew we tried and that we were thinking for his best interest.

        We’ve told the parents of several scouts that they were required to attend troop activities closely with their son to help control his behavior, and strangely their son’s behavior suddenly changes most of the time without the parents having attend. Parents just needed a wakeup call.

        While we have had families quit our troop when parents were asked to help with their son’s behavior, we’ve never asked any scout to quit. The parents always made that choice. When behavior gets to the point of pulling the parents in for help, change usually follows one way or the other.

        Barry

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        • #65
          Test test, etc. test.

          Comment


          • #66
            We are lucky that we have a troop in the area whos SM's son has aspergers, so he gladly runs the troop and takes in kids who need more attention/patience.

            But its not just "special needs" kids that act this way. We have had kids in our cub scout den who have anger issues. One we worked with very closely, and he actually made an incredible positive change. He went from throwing scissors in his class at the teacher to actually saying yes sir and yes mam and listening to the adults after a year in the den. But we have others that don't respond so well and just have to sit out when they get out of control.

            As stated above, we don't have degrees in mental health and are not properly trained to deal with these kids. And its especially unfair on our own kids if some kids take more attention/time away from their activities. That is why we just go with the sit out rule, if you cannot control yourself to participate, you need to go home or sit out the activity while the other kids are having fun.

            Comment


            • Twocubdad
              Twocubdad commented
              Editing a comment
              I vote this as the best first post by a new member. Welcome Nola!

              Do you best. Know your limitations. Have fun.

          • #67
            It is a wash....the two scouts that used the scout with issues as an excuse has not come back......

            Comment


            • #68
              Basement,
              Even if the problem scout was the real reason that they quit, they probably wouldn't come back.
              Because it's a lot easier to sit on your duff playing xbox and txting rather than to get up and go to a scout meeting.
              In 8 years of doing this, I've only known of one scout who stopped scouting and then came back, and that was with a huge push from his parents. If you stop scouting, it seems easier just to stay stopped than to restart.
              But regardless, this isn't about the 2 scouts who quit. and it isn't about the scout who was suspended and should probably leave the troop.
              it's about the boys who are still in your troop, the ones who are there and they need the adults to sometimes step up and get rid of the bad apple that is causing grief to their friends.

              Comment


              • #69
                I don't remember anything anywhere in BSA material that says troops get to cherry pick the good kids from the neighborhood.

                If properly focused, some of my ADHD and Asperger's kids have done some remarkable things. I.e. one of my former troop's most successful popcorn sale was run exclusively by a 13 year old ADHD boy who was NOT on medications. His energy level for accomplishing it was better than anyone I've ever seen. He had the paperwork done, he was on task, he turned in sheets for the boys weekly after hounding them to turn them in, got the prizes lined up and distributed the popcorn to the boys far better than any adult has done in the past.

                Never underestimate the potential of your boys, ALL of your boys!

                Stosh

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