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I understand about different schedules, too, since for three years my son's school schedule was different than everybody else in his troop. But on the very rare occasion where my son has had to arrive late or leave early from a campout or other troop function, I've always been prepared to drive him myself. My thinking is: if we're the ones who need schedule variations, then we're the ones who need to deal with the resulting transportation issues.
So my advice: next time, if you know your son's transporation needs don't fit with the troop's schedule, just plan to drive him, yourself (or don't plan for him to go). Then you won't need to worry about situations like this one.
And let your son's SM deal with the other aspects - sounds like he's on it. (unexpected Crew members showing up to a campout without prior notice, the Webelos 3 atmosphere, etc)