Re: Angry Parent

Paul,

Been there, done that!!!

Shortly after we started this pack a very similar situation came up. Our
Tigers wanted to meet every week so they could get ALL of theALMIGHTY
paws. We being new and not really knowing better said ok. This was with
the understanding that the family activities would also be done outside
the den and "reports" given inside the den. Then "IT" happened. Someone
missed a den meeting and they didn't get the ALMIGHTY paw. OH NO!!! my
kid doesn't have as much stuff on his shirt as everyone elses kid.

The decision wound up being ours ( my husband and mine. ) We decided that
the point of all this wasn't the paw. We told all the Tigers and parents
that you couldn't make up a paw. Our reasoning was we didn't want to let
the parents or boys think the den wasn't important and that they didn't
have to attend. We also didn't want the boys to think the paw was the
most important thing. We felt it was a means to an end or an end to a
means, depending on how you look at it. It wound up being a very good
decision for our pack.

The parents knew they had to be there. The boys wanted to be there. AND
it helped to foster a togetherness of that den. That den has been our
biggest den to date and they seem to get along (the boys) fairly well.

I think it has also brought out the best in some of the parents. I think
if we had let them make up a paw outside the den the same comorodory
would not be there. The Tiger program is designed foster a togetherness
of the boy and his partner. There are plenty of family activities to do
outside the den. If you introduce the idea that what happens in the den
isn't important I think it will hurt you in the long run. Letting
parents have their way just because they can yell loud is also going to
get you in trouble down the road. When I did Being A Leader with my son,
a Bear, one of the things we had to talk about was making decisions that
not everyone liked. I had some first hand knowledge of that from
Scouting.

I guess what I'm trying to say is you and everyone else are going to have
to live with decision that is made for a very long time. ( there will be
a bigger fuss if you try and change it later) You can't give in to
pressure. You have to ALWAYS think of ALL the boys and what message is
being sent to them. We just didn't want the boys to think the paw was
the most important thing.

I wish you all the luck in the world and I'm sure you'll make the
decision that is right for your pack. Please let us know how it goes.


Robin Toomey
Pack 359
Coyle OK

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