Re: The kid, not us Dads/Moms
Amick Robert (amick@SPOT.COLORADO.EDU)
Thu, 23 Jan 1997 12:24:15 -0700
Tough situation, but not uncommon. The bottom line of course is that it
is up to the Scout. I have seen similar situations where Dad was an ASM
and an Eagle, and had high hopes for son doing the same; but sometimes it
just isn't in the "cards" because son has other interests. Sometimes
Scouts have a tough time when a parent is a leader in the unit because it
puts what they perceive to be "undue pressure" on them ("oh, your dad
is the SM, you'll get special treatment..") or conversely, Dad holds
son to a higher standard than other Scouts in the Troop, even
unconsciously, and then wonders why son has problems. Dads who are
involved in the Troop have to make a special effort to be sensitive to and
deal with those situations on a regular basis, or they may get overlooked
and not talked about, until it is too late, and son drops out.
Other factors may be present too; Sometimes son doesn't have any real
friends in the troop, and feels uncomfortable; solution might be to find a
troop where he does have some schoolmates/Scouts who are friends even if
it isn't with Dad's troop. Or maybe you can get some of the son's friends
to consider joining so he will have someone to be with on troop
activities.
Sometimes son just doesn't enjoy
camping/outdoor activities, but may really be into other things like
computers, sports, etc., and maybe the Troop could provide some resources
for those interests. Outdoor activity is important but it isn't the only
thing Scouting is about. Versatility to meet the needs and interests of
all members should be carefully considered. Sometimes doing a
"brainstorming session" with all the Scouts will produce some great ideas
about what they would like to do and be a part of, and those ideas should
be pursued if at all possible.
Discussion with or by other older Scouts/Eagles with the
son may help get him interested. Just the fact that an older Scout takes a
personal interest in the younger Scout and tries to help him often goes a
long way in getting him interested, when adults just wouldn't have the
same influence. Older Scouts and Explorers are often "ten feet tall" to
younger Scouts and can really make a difference.
Most of all, you really need to find
out from the son what his interests are or aren't in Scouting, and in the
Troop in particular. If there is something that can be done to get him
interested in a particular aspect of the program, that might be an
inspiration for him to get active. Some Scouts really like first aid and
"moulaging;" others enjoy aquatics; so the list goes on.
Another problem that occasionally comes up is units that tend to stay in
a "rut" on program activities, and repeat many
of the same events, year after year. To some extent repeating certain
activities is OK especially if the Scouts really enjoy them and look
forward to them each year; but sometimes you need variety, and most of
all the program needs to come from ideas the Scouts have about things they
like to do.
If all these efforts fail, and the Scout feels that it just isn't his
"thing," you may just have to accept the fact that he would be happier in
different pursuits.
Maybe as he gets older (14-21) he would be interested in doing
something in Exploring such as a career/hobby specialty post, such as law
enforcement, ham radio, emergency services, engineering, business, etc. I
have seen a number of Scouts who were "burning out" on traditional Boy
Scouting get really fired up when they joined a Division of Wildlife, Law
Enforcement, Emergency Management or High Adventure Explorer Post.
So keep options open and look for alternatives to keep the young man in
Scouting in some venue.
Bob Amick, Explorer Advisor, High Adventure Explorer Post 72, Boulder, CO
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City |
