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Re: Are you afraid?

Deb Williams, CPA (DEBW@VTVM1.BITNET)
Mon, 20 Feb 1995 11:43:22 EST


From: Deb Williams, CPA
Controller's Office: Financial Reporting Section
Virginia Tech 201 Southgate Center 0312 (703) 231-8556
I want to respond to the comments of Tony & Bob on the disruptive boy.

While I agree wholeheartedly that at times we have to ask some boys to leave
I would strongly encourage those leaders that deal with the boy to seek
the guidance of: their Higher Authority (God, Allah, etc.)
the boy, himself in a quiet meeting (after speaking with
the Higher Authority)
the parents
and with (please be anonymous) a GOOD special education
councelor--NEVER, unless you have written
permission, reveal the boy's identity!

...Before you ask the boy to leave the troop.

Let me explain why. I have two sons with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD).
One son has the hyperactivity piece (ADHD). Depending on the degree of the
disorder, a child with ADHD (or ADD) can be disruptive, disrespectful, and
seem to consciously disobey and even to put others at risk.

Can the leader get through to this boy? Usually, BUT only with some extra
training, help from the parents, and if the child is medicated during school,
sometimes asking for the medication to continue on scout functions. And
sometimes the parent has to become involved in the Troop (we are).

There are 5 boys in our Troop of 25 boys. They are the toughest ones to
work with and they are the ones that tend to drive us NUTS the most. But
when we practice the rules of working with kids with ADD the WHOLE troop
does better. I've decided that most of the rules are just common sense
parenting and why am I so dumb I can't remember to use them all the time...
Because they take extra effort and work.

I'll never forget my shame when working with a young boy that I asked the
parent in desperation to remove his son. Thankfully, the Dad had more patience
than I did. He explained that the child was being adopted by his family
and had been mentally abused. Could he please work with me to keep his
son in the group. We did. His son became an eagle scout and a finer
young man couldn't have been asked for. And I got a lot older and was much
wiser when it came to dealing with my own sons.

It is hard to make the decision to ask a child to leave. The safety of
other scouts does need to be considered. My suggestion is to cover all
the bases first, then after you have done everything else, go back to
your Higher Authority and do as you are inspired.

Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City

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