RE: Uniform redesign (fabric safety issues and hypothermia)
James H. Moss (JHMoss@Lawyernet.com)
Thu Apr 02 19:42:00 1998
Having someone in your group wearing cotton can also get you tied up. I
know this sounds a little far fetched, so I will explain.
I was working a commercial raft trip on the Dolores river. Cold trip.
Last day, 20 miles to the take out, small framed skinny girl is getting to
cold in her blue jeans. She goes a little out of it and we pull over and
warm her up. Back on the river less than 20 minutes later she is almost
out of it. by the time we get to shore she is barely conscious. We get to
fires started put her in the middle, flip two boats over her and start to
strip her out of the cotton. The female leader of the trip goes ballistic
accusing us of sexually assaulting this girl. (Church group.) She is
beating on us and trying to cover the girl up with stuff and the girl is
now unconscious. We pull the leader off and start stripping the girl and
the leader is swinging a paddle at us. The second time I got hit, I
grabbed the leader and tired her hands behind her back then tired her to a
rock.
While by now the whole group thinks, she is nuts, I am scarier nuts and
they don't know what to do. The other male leaders have no back bone and
would not help us with either the girl or the leader.
We get the girl, warm in a sleeping bag and back to a conscious
temperature. Find out she doesn't like the groover so she hasn't taken a
crap in two days, consequently she hasn't eaten or drank anything etc.
We send a safety kayacker ahead to get an ambulance (an unbeknownst to the
group leaders a sheriff at the take out) and haul butt out.
I put the female leader in a boat with another religious fanatic boatman
and tell him he can untie her when he feels safe.
I take off with the girl. Get to the take out about 30 minutes ahead of
the crew and send the girl to the hospital.
Explain to the sheriff what is going to happen when the leader shows up and
wait.
Female leader hits shore and starts screaming at the cop about the sexual
assault. After about 10 minutes he cuffs her and sticks her in the cruiser
and calls for assistance.
Eventually, I talk the cop into writing a long report to cover my butt,
letting the idiot out of the cruiser if she goes straight back to Denver.
He walks her over to the van, uncuffs her and puts her in the van and
talks to her for about 2 minutes with his index finger. Says something to
the driver and closes the door. The van took off and that is the last I
heard of the group.
Fun trip.
If a boy has enough intelligence, he should consider entering the ministry,
unless when he goes to the university, he is given to carousing, drinking
and wenching, in which case he ought to take up the study of Law.
James H. Moss, Attorney at Law
12340 W. Alameda Pkwy., Lakewood, CO 80228-2841
303-980-5353 Fax 303-989-2316
JHMoss@Lawyernet.com
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