Re: Eagle Court Parent Dilemma
CHUCK BRAMLET (chuckb@AZTEC.ASU.EDU)
Wed, 14 Apr 1999 08:27:51 -0700
Auntie Beans asks about how a boy can "honor" his father when the
father has been absentee, and not done much but the boy wants him
there anyway.
Interesting that this question should pop up _now_ considering the
ECOH that just occurred in my Troop a couple of weeks ago. I had
wanted to post about it, but it was still a bit too personal to step
back and write about. You'll understand when you finish reading
this.
Three boys got Eagle in a joint CoH. This is usual in our Troop, and
was the _boy's_ wish. One of the boys had both parents present, and
a "normal" family. Another's mother had died of cancer when he was
working on Eagle. Then there was "Roger". Roger's father had moved
out, and in down the street with a "younger, prettier model" when he
was about 12. The family situation was such that I _never_ saw his
father at all.
The first boy I mentioned got his Eagle in the standard ceremony.
The second one, when his fater was escorted to the stage, the father
stopped by his wife's mother and brought her to the stage with him,
to fulfill the part usually played by the mother.
Roger's mother was the only one escorted to the stage, and she did
both functions. Then, the Scoutmaster asked 7 of the Troops current
and previous leaders to the stage. These were men who had had a
"significant" hand in helping Roger in his difficult times, as well
as on his road to Eagle. There were several ASMs, a couple of MCs,
and two previous SMs. I was one of the 7. He presented _all_ of us
with the Eagle Father's Pin, as a thank you from him for our help.
He asked that when we wore it, to remember him.
I found this quite moving, and haven't been able to write about it
yet. Until now. I honestly wonder if he would have made Eagle at
all if _any_ of the 7 of us had not been around.
So, what I am saying is that it is entirely within precedent for this
boy to either have both fathers on stage with him at the same time,
or to call his natural father to the stage and present him with a
father's pin also, after he has recieved his Eagle Medal. I would
say that whatever the boy wants to do is fine - it's his day.
YiS,
Chuck Bramlet -- I "used to be" an Antelope! WEM-10-95 Member DNRC
ASM Troop 323, Firebird District, Grand Canyon Council, Phoenix, Az.
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The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of
comfort and convenience, but where he stands in times of challenge
and controversy. -- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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