Re: Ideas for Women in Scouting
ALICERAE@AOL.COM
Fri, 11 Dec 1998 15:15:18 EST
Regarding Judy Yeager's response, I have a few notes to add:
I couldn't agree with you more. I have found that those men who don't want
women in their troop also treat the other women in their lives like dirt.
They have no respect for any woman and feel threatened by those women who have
achieved a position equal or higher to theirs. National policy allows women
to hold any position that is favored by the Troop Committee and Chartered
Organization. A SM does not have any right to deny someone to hold a
position. Sounds like a SM who runs the troop instead of the boys!
My ASM (who is also a woman) and myself took our 9 boys to summer camp last
summer. The camp director (who has been doing this for 27 years) said he
never saw a group of boys having more fun or who were more respectful of
adults. He also noted that my leader and I were "tougher on our boys than any
man he had ever seen".
I make sure that parents of new Scouts know that the leaders in our troop may
be female, but if they are looking for a "den mother" they are looking in the
wrong place. I take pride in NOT mothering my boys -- I've been a single
parent for 15 years and I definitely don't have a momma's boy -- my boys are
independent, self-reliant, confident and work together very well. Yes, there
are those Cub leaders who move into Boy Scouting and continue to do everything
for their Scouts -- men and women.
Actually, in a troop I was in a few years ago, I had some boys who had a
problem with a woman who expected them to work and not a woman who did
everything for them. These boys are used to their "mommies" at home doing all
those chores for them and making sure that everything is done just right.
They didn't like the fact that I expected them to pull their weight (difficult
things like washing their dishes and putting up their own tent) and they
fought me on it and went home complaining to their parents.
That troop is now run by a male SM (who was my ASM at the time) who does
everything for the boys. Talk about mothering them! He doesn't expect
anything from them, I mean anything. Two weeks at summer camp and boys are
not expected to DO ANYTHING. They do what they want and the SM feels that it
is okay.
As far as boys coming out of a tent in their underwear ---- why would they
have to do that? Does the SM do the same? Where have they learned that
behavior? Sounds like they need to learn about safe haven and respect of
others.
My boys have had no problem with me being the SM. Parents and I have a clear
understanding of my job and theirs. I am upfront and honest with them and let
them know that there is no difference between a man or a woman holding this
position -- except for the fact that I can't teach them to write their name in
the snow and when I go to the bathroom while we're backpacking I will use
another tree ---- they look at how I have raised my son and they see that I
don't "mommy" him either.
Look at how an adult treats their own child and look at what type of parent
they are. That will tell you right off what kind of Scout leader they will
be. It has nothing to do with gender. These men need to pull their heads out
and realize that having women in these positions is an asset, not a detriment
to a troop's program.
Come visit one of our campouts sometime and take a look. Glad to have ya!
Alice Rae
Scoutmaster, Troop 26
Napa, California
Mt. Diablo Silverado District
"a good 'ol Bobwhite, too" WE3-41-95
