Re: _WE_ have a problem

Rich Locke writes...

>People often have totally different perceptions of the same event
>or discussion. Some have different levels of sensitivity or
>"thickness of hide." Some folks enjoy a spirited debate... some
>don't.

For the most part, what you say is true. Many, however, recieve
posts that they interpret as flames, whether they were intended as
such or not. IMHO, If I send you a message, and you call it a
flame, then you got flamed. Some may consider a sarcastic response
as a flame, others may not.

It is unfortunate that sarcasm and humor conveyed by one's facial
expression or tone of voice don't make it very far in these email
discussions. That's why many of us use "smileys". I find it best
to word my responses to be as neutral as possible in emotional
content.

My point was that, agree or disagree, all posters need to take a bit
of time to consider how their reply is likely to be interpreted.

I would say though, that in general, disagreement is not flaming,
and neither is lack of affirmation or addressing a wider issue. But
I will _gaurentee_ you that if you say to your wife (or husband),
"Honey, when I look in your eyes, time stands still" you will get a
more gratifying response than if you say "Your face would stop a
clock". ;)

>I'll bet that there are some who will interpret this response as a
>flame on Chuck.

Being a refugee of rec.arts.books.tolkien, snide comments on this
list don't generally strike me as flames. No one here has, as yet,
questioned my parentage or ancestry on the basis of a post that I
made... ;) But that doesn't mean that a terse reply to another
poster shouldn't or can't be taken as a flame. I see an awful lot
of short tempered responses lately, and it disturbs me.

Again, watch the SO/SL.

YiS,

Chuck Bramlet -- I "used to be" an Antelope! WEM-10-95 Member DNRC
ASM Troop 323, Firebird District, Grand Canyon Council, Phoenix, Az.
mailto:chuckb@aztec.asu.edu
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The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of
comfort and convenience, but where he stands in times of challenge
and controversy. -- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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