Re: Question from a new den leader
Steven G. Tyler (sgtyler@EROLS.COM)
Sun, 20 Sep 1998 12:39:35 -0400
Lisa Conatser wrote, in part:
> A brand new Wolf den leader asked me today about "parental jealousy". The old
> "why does Jimmy have more awards than my little Stevie?" type issues.
>
> I suggested that when this occurs to explain to the parent just what Jimmy
> did to receive the award in question, point to the appropriate written
> resources, smile, and offer to assist little Stevie if needed.
>
> Any other suggestions that you would like to offer?
Good response. I might just add that boys tend to advance at different
rates -- some are most interested just in the social aspect of getting
together and having a good time, while others really catch on to the
"advancement" part of the program, aggressively pursuing completion of
the available awards. If appropriate, it might also be mentioned that
occassionally the "over-achievement" is the result of *parental*
pressure and goals, and that this, in the long term, is more likely to
be counterproductive. The best parental approach, IMHO, is gentle
encouragement and involvement, rather than rigid goal-setting and
pressure.
> At times jealousy among
> the younger age groups can be very difficult to contend with. This den had
> a few physical altercations among the children as Tiger cubs over who had
> and/or deserved the iron on paws.
This can only be increased if the parents buy into the competition. If
the parents instead help their boys understand that advancement it is
*not* a competition, but an individual challenge, some of this may be
defused.
--
YIS, Steve on Cattail Creek <Steven G. Tyler>, Severna Park, MD, USA
"The Computer Counselor," Technology Consulting for the Law Office
Advancement Chair and de facto Webmaster, Troop 339,
Baltimore Area Council, BSA (http://members.aol.com/troop339/)
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