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It's a mess!
David F. Delman (Delman01@COMPUSERVE.COM)
Wed, 1 Jul 1998 00:48:52 -0400
<<28 Jun 1998 22:40:38 Joe Marsh <propwash@AIRMAIL.NET>>
<<--An On Line Helpful Response
<<29 Jun 1998 09:06:53 Brian Nielsen <BN1@COMPUSERVE.COM>>
Howdy TX-JoeM,
Hot and Humid enough yet!!
Well understanding all sides of your situation
and her/son's situation may not be much help??
Just what you wanted to hear RIGHT??
We should STRIVE to INCLUDE
Reluctantly EXCLUDE when worthwhile
and EXCLUDE in a Helpful way
that holds a future HAND of INCLUSION.
I am sorry to write that YOU (JOE) from Texas
can't deal with this situation. All of us
have limits as to what and who we can deal =
with and change when we are standing next =
to it or them. If most of us where were you
are we would also not succeed assisting her
and him. She is strong willed.
There is nothing wrong with admitting
your or someone else's current limitations.
Recommendation #1
If you can find a mature OUTSIDER e.g.
a Unit or District Commissioner they might
be able to get her to HEAR what she can't
hear from you and CHANGE in time for your =
troop's next experience. The OUTSIDER has
an advantage to YOU and HER even if less
qualified than you. A sad yet true fact
about how most people currently deal with
close relationships versus the outside
expert.
If she can't change in time so that YOU are =
happy that the boy will be getting the most out
of scouting EXCLUDE him/her. This exclusion
keeps you sane and helpful to ALL the boys
as well as sends him/her and the dad an
important message of caring, and limitations.
Consider exclusion like a Time-Out.
If you can't bring in the OUTSIDER in time
than go to your Committee and have them
call an emergency conference with the family.
The Troop side should include one or two
mom's. This conference is for you so that =
HER difficulty will not be seen as a contest
between you and her. Be up front about Exclusion
as a necessary current motivator. Also please =
make sure you call your DE or SE and keep them =
informed as to your positive efforts and attitudes.
It is a Tough one, yet HEY you are a Scout too =
and consider this as a learning experience on
the SM to Beaver pathway.
GOOD LUCK for TX-JoeM and Her/Him/Nam-Vet
YiS, IMHO, and may we each attempt to live the SO,SL,SS,SM
Mr Dave (Hawleyton, NY (Baden-Powell Council=
Terry Howerton Sakima Group, Inc. SCOUTER Magazine Kansas City |
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